Grumpy Ones
by Billini
Summary: Fenris search for Varania brings him to Ferelden... where he meets an Elven woman who has good chances to give him the most challenging time of his life...
1. Alienage Life

I

Her eyes became small while watching the stranger. He was an elf, but he looked… alien. White markings went all over his body, and he was wearing a black armor with tight trousers. His movements were graceful and strong, even though he was carrying an immense broadsword on his back.

Normally she would have liked the view as he had a more than good-looking face. What she did not like was the slightly disgusted look on his face while walking through the alienage in Denerim. He seemed as if he did not really want to be here. And from the way he watched everybody and everything around him, he seemed to believe to be better than the rest of the elves who were attendant.

Prick.

He was probably an Elven servant, sent by his human master to do whatever he was told to do. She met elves like him before: Good-looking, thinking of themselves as superior compared to those elves who simply offered their goods on the market in the alienage. She hated these guys. They thought they could come, get what they were sent for and then make acquaintance with one of the poor elf girls somewhere in a dark corner. As if they had to be thankful to grip their attention! Pff…

"Oh, look at him", one of the merchant girls nearby said in this moment to her friend. "He is gorgeous…!"

"Mmm", the other one answered. "Do you think the size of his sword says anything about the size of… other things…?"

She rolled her eyes while the two girls giggled and then immediately went still when he suddenly approached them. She tensed and watched him carefully from her place under the tree nearby where she was sitting on the ground and carving.

The two girls watched him nervously when he stopped and asked: "I am looking for your eldest!"

Damn, not even good-looking, but also with some kind of raspy, goose bumps provoking voice…

The two girls simply stared at him and obviously weren't able to give any answer. He scowled and repeated his question harshly: "Where!?"

She rose silently and received a grateful look from the two merchant girls while she approached. Well, now she was good enough as it seems. Normally the two of them did not want to have anything to do with her. Not that it mattered. Or she cared.

The stranger felt her approaching and turned to her, sizing her up with deep green eyes. Now she could see that his hair was white and not pale blond.

"What do you want from the Hahren?" she asked and pronounced the Elven word for eldest. No wonder he hadn't used it. He probably didn't even know it!

"That is none of your business", he answered. "I need to talk to him privately."

"He is ill", was all she repeated, "and he is old. I won't allow that you talk to him if you do not let me know what you want."

The two girls gasped, and their looks shot from him to her and back. He had raised an eyebrow, mockingly, and crossed his arms in front of his chest. "And who are you to decide this?"

"The person who can lambaste you in case you make any problems!"

He chuckled. He actually chuckled! It wasn't an amused, but a dark chuckle, and she felt that she tensed and closed her fingers more firmly around the knife she still held. The truth was that her daggers were not here, but in her little house, and she would not stand any chance against him if he decided to use this broadsword against her.

Anyway, backing off was NO option.

Prick…

„Cassalia!"

She flinched when she heard her full name and the way it was pronounced. Even without turning around she felt Sinus, the hahren's son, approaching, and even without seeing his face she knew that he was not amused. Contrary to his father who had always been patient and yielding with her, Sinus had more than one time made clear that he thought the alienage would have been much better if she just left.

"What is it, Sinus?", she said without looking at him, still watching the stranger whose eye brows had risen in the meantime. "I have business here. This stranger…"

"… has sent a letter to us beforehand and announced his arrival", Sinus completed her sentence. "So I assume you do not plan to do anything with this knife in your hand, do you?"

Her knuckles went white while she could see the look on the stranger's face change from vigilant and tense to smug. Not one second his eyes left her face, and she knew – she KNEW – that he could see all of the emotions she was never able to hide: Her anger, her shame, her desire to just turn around and punch Sinus in his… but well, she already did this years ago when they both had been much younger and he had tried to kiss her, and afterwards he had been complaining for days. She was not sure if she could bear it again without killing him.

"Cassalia!"

"Don't call me that!" she hissed and did a step back. "It's Cassy!"

Sinus ignored her words and turned instead to the stranger. "I apologize for her behavior. She is… special. So you are Fenris?"

The Elven warrior nodded and watched him carefully.

"I am Sinus", the eldest son answered. "I read your letter and answered it. Not many elves in the alienage are able to read, but my master made sure that I learn it to be better able to serve him."

He sounded so proud, but all Cassy could feel was revulsion. "You mean he made sure that you become the biggest lickspittle of whole Denerim!"

His eyes became small, but instead of answering her, he just turned back to the stranger called Fenris and said: "Follow me!"

Her eyes met those of the white haired elf who had the nerves to take a small bow in front of her and then turned around.

"Sir, please…"

They both tensed simultaneously and looked to the merchant booth where the two elven girls were still standing. A human man had appeared and was touching the hair of one of the girls while stroking salaciously over the pommel of his sword.

Cassy knew him: He was one of the guards assigned to the gate between the alienage and the eastern part of the city and already had approached Kara, the young elven woman, more than one time before. So far she always had found a way to get out of his way, but obviously he had decided to become more brazen by touching her against her will in the middle of the day and visible to everybody around.

The sight brought unwanted memories back: The day more than eight years ago when Vaughn and his men had come and taken Shianni and the others with them. The day she had been too late and received the scar on her face…

"You!" she shouted and her knife jumped into her hand. "Let her go!"

The guard only raised an eyebrow at her words and continued stroking Kara's hair. She was pale and tense, and her friend's eyes went nervously from Cassy to the guard and back to Kara.

"I don't know what you mean, elf", he said as slippery as an eel. "I am only… examining the offered goods…"

And that did it. She charged… at least she would have charged if not a strong hand had grabbed her elbow and stopped her.

"Let me", she hissed and whirled around to the stranger who ignored her and instead looked the guard into the eyes.

"I am quite sure that not this woman is the one who should be examined by you, but the goods on the table in front of her. Don't you agree?"

The guard seemed to be irritated for a short moment, than he let Karas hair go and grabbed her waist instead. "Anything else you want to tell me, knife ear?"

Fenris fingers around her elbow stiffened, but still he did not let her go. So Cassy used the only option she had at the moment without fighting him instead of the guard: Her lovely voice. "Get your ass back to some human whore in the The Pearl. She at least will try to give you the impression that she likes you, although she will also see nothing else but a stinking coward in you…!"

Now she had the guard's full attention, and he finally let Kara go and turned to her instead. "Bitch", he barked. "If you don't shut up, I will…"

Fenris fingers fell away from her arm, but instead of using the chance to charge, she could only stare at him.

He started to glow. His tattoos – his markings – filled with silver-blue light while he took the sword from his back. And it really was an immense sword. She had no idea how he could hold it so easily and dangerously at the same time. "It's time for you to leave", was the only thing he said.

The guard stared at him and had become a bit paler. "What kind of Elven freak are you…?"

"The person who can lambaste you in case you make any problems!" he repeated exactly the same words she had said to him only some minutes ago, and she did not know if she should laugh or scowl.

The effect on the guard was definitely different from the effect her words had had on him. The human made a step back, then snarled and left with the words: "We will see each other again!"

She whirled around and saw Fenris stiffen, but he was - at least in this second - not the one she was angry about. "Why haven't you done anything?" she asked Sinus and then looked at the other elves. "All of you? Why is it a stranger that comes to Karas help?"

Sinus face gave away no feelings, but his eyes told her that he was ashamed.  
"You know what happened the last time we dared to raise our voice. Shianni and the others were taken away, you as well, and not all of you came back. It took weeks unless they stopped looking for you, Cassalia!" He pressed his lips together. "It is time that you finally understand: We have no rights in this world. All we can do is making sure to not attract anyone's attention. And people like you only make it worse!"

This is the first part of a little experiment I am currently doing on DeviantArt:

gallery/39024112#/d5c0fen

I hope you have fun with it!


	2. Get to know each other

"And people like you only make it worse!"

That did it. Damn, she was so angry she had the feeling she would burst each moment and punch him into his stupid face…

_Cassy, calm down_, her father would have said. _You have to learn that you cannot change anyone else. You can only change yourself… if this is what you like to do._

Damn, she missed him. He was gone for two months, and still it felt as if it had been yesterday. He had been the reason why she had never left this place, but now that he was not here anymore… Somehow she still was stuck in this place and could not go.

But he had been right. She could not change these people. But the last thing she wanted to do was changing herself. So she had to keep on living with the fact that she would always be seen as the troublemaker and the girl who did not know her place.

She made a step back, shaking her head. "I will not argue with you, Sinus. If you really think that it is wrong to fight for your people, to try to keep them safe from murder and rape, then… there is nothing left for me to say. "

With these words and the silence that followed she turned. Fenris was calm and watched Sinus with an expression on his face she could not read. Their eyes met briefly before she left, and she had the feeling that she had gained his respect with her words.

Not that it mattered. He still was a prick.

Her eyes went to his markings which looked normal again.

Rather a strange prick, but still a prick.

She went back to the tree where she had been carving, took her stuff and turned to leave.

Kara gave her a small smile and thanked her, and she simply nodded and said: "Don't go out alone, Kara. He will come back!"

She inhaled deeply when she had finally left the market area and found a quiet place somewhere near the bakery. She liked the smell of the bread although no elf would ever get to see it as it was directly brought to the human districts. Only the old, hard bread was left for them.

Concentrating on carving, Cassy tried not to think about what had happened. She knew that it was time to leave, but where should she go? Maybe to Solis… He had moved to Redcliffe some years ago. She had always avoided going there because she was afraid of his pity… and his annoying habit of pairing her off with one of his friends.

Still, the thought made her smile, but it faded when she heard a suspicious sound…

Her head came up, as well as the knife in her hand.

"Cassy…. It's me…"

A small sigh came over her lips when she identified her follower: Shianni.

She smiled when she saw her cousin. Shianni was one of the strongest women she knew, a person she adored and admired. Despite everything Vaughn had done to her, she had stayed strong and always fought for the rights of her people. In her own way: By speaking and arguing and never backing down. Queen Anora wasn't the most caring ruler, but nevertheless Shianni had managed to speak to her in the past to make it better for her people.

What a shame her attempts did not achieve the results she deserved. What happened with the guard was the best example for it.

"Cassy, calm down…"

"I AM calm…"

Shianni laughed and sat down next to her. "You are still angry."

"And I have every right to be angry", she grumbled. "Sinus is such a coward. And an idiot…"

Her cousin simply shrugged, and Cassy had to bite on her lip to keep herself from saying anything else. She did not want to remind Shianni of her past. And she hoped that her cousin had only learned from the others about her argument with Sinus and did not hear it by herself.

"I have the feeling… that it's time for me to leave, Shianni", Cassy calmly said. "You have your own way of fighting, but I… I cannot simply stay and look and do nothing."

"Then go and visit Soris… he has asked you so many times…"

She smiled. "Maybe I will do so. Why don't you come with me…?"

Shianni shook her head. "There are things for me to do here. The Warden Commander will be in the palace next week, and whenever he is here, he helps me getting a meeting with the queen and supports my every request."

"Because he really likes you, Shianni", Cassy repeated softly what she had told her cousin so many times before.

Shianni looked a bit rosy-cheeked, and she grinned. Thyr Mahariel had met her cousin when he came to Denerim some weeks before the end of the blight and had helped her to defend the elves from Tevinter slavers who had hold them captured.

Cassy had been one of them. Never would she forget the moment he had come and murdered the damn magister who had wanted to make slaves out of them.

Since this moment Shianni and he met each other from time to time, and although her cousin would never admit it, she seemed to like the calm Dalish. Thyr on the other hand seemed to have all the patience and time of the world to win her trust.

Cassy liked this guy. But she was the last person who should and could give advices in love matters, so she said nothing else to her cousin.

Shianni and she went back to the market place some minutes later. It had become dark in the meantime, and the streets were empty. Cassys eyes wandered carefully over the shadows as she expected to see the guard to make his threat come true, but he was nowhere to be seen.

After wishing Shianni good night, she went back to her father's house… and immediately stopped when she saw the light and heard voices from inside.

Frowning, she went to the building, grabbed the door knob and stormed inside.

Sinus and the stranger – Fenris – stood in the entry area of the house. The Elven warrior went rigid when he saw her, while Sinus tried to look self assured and sublime.

"Cassalia", he welcomed her. "It is good that you are finally here. I know we had some… communication issues earlier today, but I offered Fenris to stay at your house for the night. You are the only one who can offer him a single room, and he is our guest."

She stared at him. It was obviously that he had chosen his words carefully, nevertheless she said after some seconds: "Are you nuts?"

He seemed to have anticipated such a reaction, as he did not even flinch. Instead, he said: "Cassalia, I had hoped that even you would not have forgotten the word hospitality. Your father would have always offered a visitor to stay…"

Rage started to boil inside of her. He knew that her father was her weak spot. And he knew that she would never do anything to stain his memento.

"I apologize", Fenris said in this moment and took his luggage. "I was not aware that this is your house." With these words he wanted to leave, but she got in his way and snarled "Stay!" without taking her eyes of Sinus.

A smug look appeared on the face of the eldest son. He thought that he had won.

Fenris deep voice said next to her: "I don't think that is a good idea…"

"I said stay!" she repeated and finally looked at him. When she saw that he was frowning, she tried to calm herself and forced herself to add: "Please. Be my guest!"

For a long moment they looked at each other. She saw that he was struggling with his pride, but then he made a decision, nodded and said: "It will be only one night. Tomorrow I will be leaving at dawn."

She simply nodded and looked at Sinus again. "Anything else you want?"

"No." He went to the door and flashed Fenris a glance. "I am sorry that I could not give you better information regarding your sister."

Fenris' jaw went rigid. "Your help was welcome, Sinus", was all he answered after a short moment.

After these strange words the eldest son left and they were both alone.

Cassy examined the Elven warrior thoughtfully. "Your sister…?"

He went even more rigid and seemed to simply want to ignore her question, but then he decided – again – otherwise and said: "Varania. She arrived her in the alienage some months ago, but Sinus said that she left in the meantime."

She tensed. Varania…?

His piercing eyes locked with hers. "Did you know her? And if so, do you have any idea where she could have been going…?"

Oh, she knew her…. and how she knew her. Varania had come to the alienage many weeks ago and had always been different. She had been inapproachable and cool what basically had not been any problem for Cassy at all. But there had been something about the Elven woman which was kind of… odd. Cassy had not really trusted her and therefore kept an eye on her, and in the end her caution had made Varania confront her with the question what the hell her problem was...

"_You are my problem!"_

"_I?" Green eyes narrowed. "And who made you the new guardian of the alienage?"_

_She shrugged. "Instead of Sinus who is crawling at your feet since the moment you came here, I am not blind. You are hiding something!"_

"_So you are jealous?" Varania crossed her arms, while Cassy was hiding her laughter behind a cough. "I? Jealous? About what?"_

"_Sinus' attraction towards me!"_

_She simple shook her head. "Listen, I don't care what the two of you are doing. But I care about Micah", she looked at a young boy who was sitting nearby and watching them cautiously. "The two of you are spending a lot of time together, and he told me that you are his teacher. He might be an orphan, but you don't seem to be the kind of woman who has motherly feelings for a foreign child. So what are you teaching him?"_

_Varanias jaw tensed in a way which was – now that she knew him – very similar to Fenris'. She hesitated and finally said: "To use his magic!"_

_Cassy went rigid. Magic… That was not good. She had heard that the Ferelden circle was fighting for his freedom, but still the Chantry and the templars were responsible for the maages. _

_Templars like those arriving in the very same moment and looking for either the boy or Varania… or both…_

"What is it you know?" Fenris said impatiently and approached her.

"I was there the day she left", she answered quietly and did not back off. "She was teaching one of the orphans to use his magic, but templars came. I helped them to flee, but don't know where she took him."

A frustrated sigh came over his lips while he took a step back and stroked through his hair. She could sense how important it was for him to find his sister, and she had the feelings that he had experienced disappointments like this many times before.

"You are already looking for her for a long time, aren't you?"

His eyes met hers again. Why hadn't she recognized the similarity to Varania's eyes before?

Well, maybe because in case of the Elven woman she had always found them annoying, but in case of this warrior they were… fascinating. And in this moment they reminded her a bit of the eyes of a puppy.

Not that it mattered.

And he still was a prick!

* * *

Thanks for the favs and the review - they mean a lot to me ^^ BTW: I am looking for a Beta, so if anybody is interested, please let me know. I would appreciate it ;-)


	3. Without a trail

III

"You are already looking for her for a long time, aren't you?"

Fenris watched the face of the woman in front of him and wondered what she was thinking. Her expression was odd. A mixture of amusement and something else he could not quite figure out.

Well, the answer to her question was easy: Yes, he was now looking for quite some time for Varania. One year ago he had chased her off after killing Danarius, only to find himself months afterwards on a journey to Tevinter to bring her back. Hawke, Isabela and he had to find out that their trail had been wrong, but instead of Varania he had brought Mynari home with him, an Elven woman he had grown up with, although he had not known until meeting her. She had told him about his former life and his family, which had been both fascinating and thrilling, but also frustrating. Even though part of him had not forgiven his sister, he still hoped to find her. And as another trail had told him she might be in Ferelden, he had left Kirkwall and his friends and came here.

"Are you alright?" Cassalia's voice interrupted his memories. She frowned slightly.

"I am fine."

"So are you going to answer my question then?"

He pressed his lips together, than he turned and went back to his baggage. "I am looking for quite some time now, yes, but it does not matter. I… think I should go."

"I thought that we agreed you stay."

If he had not known better, he would have said she was offended, and a small smile appeared in the corner of his mouth when he turned again and answered: "All I remember is how you ORDERED me to stay!"

Now she was frowning again. "Oh come on, what have you expected? Sinus had no right to bring you here without asking me beforehand." Her eyes, from a darker green than his own, ran over his face. "Anyway, now you are here, I have a free bed, and besides, it's in the middle of the night if you haven't noticed."

He still hesitated, and her frown changed into an annoyed expression. "I promise not to molest you. Fine?"

He simply raised his brow as answer, but she ignored it and went into the back of the building instead.

"You can take my father's bed", she said. "He… doesn't need it anymore…"

He had followed her, but stopped when he recognized the slight trembling in her voice. "I can sleep on the floor…"

She glared at him over her shoulder. "On the floor? Are you kidding? What would that say about my hospitality…?" She grimaced and added: "No, seriously, you can sleep here."

He put his baggage carefully on the ground and asked: "Since when do you live alone?"

"Since two months." She did not look at him while answering, but continued prepare the bed.

"My sincere condolences", he calmly said.

She stopped and looked at him, her eyes wide. Then she laughed, and it was on him to frown.

"Your sincere… what?" she asked. And then she said: "You really ARE a prick, aren't you?"

Fenris tensed and looked at her as he was wondering if she was crazy. "Excuse me?"

She laughed again and saw him frowning even more deeply. "You know, the whole stuck-up and swollen speaking!"

"You mean the well-educated and polite speaking?"

She rolled her eyes and finished preparing the bed for him. "Don't be moping. It's just… well, you have a very special appearance for an elf…"

"Really?" His voice sounded dry, and when she looked at him again she saw that he was watching the markings at his arm.

"What do they mean?" she asked.

He looked at her. "Slavery!"

For a long moment she was silence, and her stomach clenched. There was something in his eyes… anger, resignation, rage. "I am sorry…"

He shrugged. "It's been a long time ago. I am… a free man now."

"I can see that", was all she could answer and felt a true smile appear on her lips. It felt kind of strange, and she realized how rarely she had truly smiled within the last weeks. "Are you hungry?"

He hesitated. "I would not say no to something to eat."

"Good!" She let him alone and went into the kitchen, starting to prepare the food. He followed her after some minutes.

To be honest she did not really have anything she could offer him… at least not anything fresh. So she grabbed some bread and jerky and put it on the table.

In case he was irritated about her lack of housewifely skills, he did not show it. Probably he was not irritated at all, given how he had experienced her today.

"Thank you."

His polite demeanor was still… strange, so all she could answer was: "You are welcome."

They ate in silence, both in their own thoughts. Eventually she asked: "What are you going to do now?"

"I will continue looking for her", he asked without hesitating.

"Without a trail?"

He simply nodded.

"In whole Ferelden? She could be everywhere?"

"Then I guess I should start as soon as possible." He appeared calm and determined.

For a long time she simply watched him, and he returned her look, his one eyebrow slightly raised. When she started to speak, she did not even know what she would say: "Look, don't get hold of the wrong end of the stick, but maybe it would make sense if you had somebody to accompany you."

Now he slightly bend his neck. "I am perfectly able to take care on my own."

She shrugged. "Listen, I am planning to leave as well and go to Redcliff. Why not travel together? These aren't the safest times. And to be honest: You aren't exactly looking harmless. So in case you want to get information, it could be from worth to have somebody with you who looks…" She ended abruptly and frowned.

"Less intimidating?" he helped her. A small smirk appeared on his lips while he was watching her face. She knew what he was seeing: A woman who was wiry and grumpy looking, with a scar on her face that had nearly cost her one eye. Not exactly the look of a woman somebody would voluntarily tell where an apostate and her pupil were hiding.

His voice brought her back. "I don't think that is a good idea."

"That is what you also said when you heard that you should stay her", she answered with a grin. "And look at you now: Hard bread and even harder meat, what do you want more…?"

He was thinking about it, but only for a second. Then he repeated: "I prefer travelling alone."

She frowned. "Do you think I would be a millstone around your neck?"

He hesitated a second too long with his answer, and she did not even give him the chance to say anything, but simply stated: "I am a fighter. My mother had been trained to become a Grey Warden. She taught me everything I know! And I bet that even you and your immense sword would have problems defeating me…"

It was obvious that he tried to hide a grin, and her temper exploded. "Are you laughing at me?"

He raised an eyebrow. "When you are in battle as short-tempered as in real life, than I have one reason more to NOT take you with me…"

She crossed her arms in front of her chest. "Alright, I just want to understand: What are the other reasons? And don't hold anything back!"

He frowned. "Why is it so important for you to know? We don't even know each other!"

"Well, I have made myself very quickly a picture about you, so I guess you did the same about me, right?" When she saw him hesitating, she added challenging: "Or are you too polite to tell me?"

He simply shook his head, a little annoyed. "As you wish. You move like you know how to use a weapon, but you are much too impulsive and blindfolded to be able to win a real fight against a real enemy. I guess you have trained your whole life, but never really used your skills in battle." He hesitated for a short moment and then added: "Despite the one time when you had to rescue your friends. For you it has a bitter aftertaste that you obviously have not been able to save all of them, and you still carry this guilt around with you like the scar on your face. You feel bitter and hate being here, yet you never had the courage to leave. And you like blaming others for all the things they don't know and understand and see, but you never tried to find a way to convince them otherwise."

She stared at him, silenced. He had spoken the words which described her so perfectly in such a quite manner. Never had anybody been so honest to her, not even her father or Shianni.

Oh, she hated him for it. But part of her was also exited.

But mainly she was furious, at least in this moment. "I was not leaving because of my father, prick!" she barked, grabbed her plate and his' and stood up. "And convincing these jerks otherwise is impossible as they have the cleverness of ants!"

"And I forgot to say", was all he answered, "that you seem to have a remarkable tendency of being childish."

She froze. Childish…? She was, apart from Shianni, the only person in this damn alienage who saw things clearly and not through rose-colored glasses!

"Alright, you asked for it", was all she said and let the dishes fall into the tub she used for washing up. Then she turned… and charged.

Her food met his chin and kicked him off his chair. If she hadn't been too busy going after him, she would have been fascinated by the sign of his flaming markings.

"Are you crazy?", he snarled while fending her off.

"Oh, somebody has a temper", she mocked him. "And to answer your question: Yes, I AM crazy!"

That was the last coherent words she said for a long time. Damn, the prick was good and moved as grace- and powerful as she already had expected. And he was fast.

They had both no weapons, but that did not keep them from using the whole space of the kitchen to fight. His advantage lay in his speed and tactics, while she was smart and determined.

And sometimes she liked fighting a bit maliciously…

He growled when she hit him in the back and nearly made him stumble, whipped around, and before she even knew what was happening she found herself with her back against the wall and 70 inches of furious elf pressed against her.

"Yield", he hissed.

She panted while a slow smile appeared on her face. He frowned, than his eyes widened as he felt the sharp blade of a kitchen knife pressed against his crotch. "You yield…"

They looked at each other for several seconds, none of them willing to back off. Then he pressed his lips together and decided that it was probably for the best not to rely on her sanity, and did a step back.

"I am going alone", was all he said before leaving the kitchen.

Her lips pressed together stubbornly. He wanted to go alone? Fine! It was not as if she NEEDED to go with him…

And yet she found herself eavesdropping the whole night for every of his move. He got up before the sun was rising, and she heard him hesitating at the entrance door. The next sound she heard made her freeze.

Had the damn prick just placed MONEY on her table?


	4. Farewell

Her first reaction was to jump up and tell him what he should do with his money, but then she inhaled deeply and tried to stay calm. Part of her knew that it was his way of saying thanks for her hospitality, but still it was also an insult. And if he really knew her as well as he pretended to do, he should know that!

The door closed silently behind him, and for some long seconds she simply laid on her bed and looked at the ceiling.

What was it that she wanted? Leaving? Going to Soris? Hoping that it was better in Redcliff?

What was it she was looking for?

She couldn't answer the question, but what she knew was that this warrior and the life he was living had made her curious. And it had shown her how few she knew about the world. All of her life, she had lived in the alienage and had never seen anything else. But that was simply not enough anymore!

She stood up quickly, grabbed her stuff and his money and left the building. There was no sign of Fenris anymore, but he could not been far gone. Anyway, there was one person she had to say goodbye before she left.

Shiannis face was tired when she opened the door. "Cassy?" Immediately she went vigilant.

"I am leaving", was all she said.

"Now?" Shianni sounded shocked and confused at the same time, and she had to smile.

"You know me, Shianni. I am not the person who prepares something like that and thinks it a hundred of times over… not like you."

Shiannis eyes ran over her face, than she nodded and pulled her in a tight embrace. "Take care of you", she whispered.

Cassy swallowed. "Yes. You as well. Oh, and Shianni… Maybe it is time for you to allow someone closer…"

Shianni raised an eyebrow and smiled slightly. "I could say the same to you. I assume our guest already left?"

She was blushing. Damn, she actually was blushing! "I don't know what you are talking about."

Now her cousin grinned. "Oh, you are sweet when you are embarrassed…"

"I am NOT sweet… or embarrassed." But she felt herself smiling again. "I will miss you, Shianni. You've been the only person who was… who is special to me."

Shiannis smile went soft. "I know. But now you should leave, before you start to cry…"

Cassy rolled her eyes. "Oh, come on…" But when she left, she really had to fight her tears.

It did not take Cassy very long to find Fenris. He was just about to cross the market place nearby the human chantry while the merchants started opening their booths. One of them, a dwarf, tried to catch his attention by showing him one of his swords, but he simply ignored him.

Cassy watched him out of the shadows. She was standing next to the entrance of one of the houses circling the market place and followed his every move.

"What are you doing?"

She flinched when she heard the childish voice and looked down into the face of a young human boy with hazel eyes.

"I… am waiting."

He frowned. "And why are you hiding?"

"I am NOT hiding…"

"Aren't you?" He did not sound convinced and crossed his arms in front of his chest, making a face. "I don't believe you."

"Listen, why don't you just… do something young boys are doing", she said impatiently while still watching Fenris who had in the meantime reached the other side of the market place.

"My mother told me to stay in the house and take care of my sister, but she is sleeping, and I am bored…"

"Is that my problem?"

He simply ignored her words and asked instead: "You are waiting for someone, right?"

She rolled her eyes. How could anyone be so young and so annoying at the same time…?

Obviously ignoring him would not solve the problem, so she simply answered: "Yes!"

"For whom?"

"My friend", she was answering due to the lack of a better idea.

And regretted it one second later.

"This one?" the boy asked and pointed at Fenris. "I am going to bring him to you…"!"

"NO!" she hissed and tried to grab his arm, but it was too late: He was already running over the market place and stopped in front of Fenris who look at him with an irritated look on his face.

Cassy was whirling around. She was not sure what she wanted to do, but definitely NOT be captured by ogling Fenris.

Of course she meant watching him. Not ogling. There was no reason at all to ogle him…

A human woman standing directly in front of her prevented her attempt to flee. She looked stressed and discontented and asked more than a little annoyed: "What are you doing in the entrance of my house, elf?"

Cassy froze.

"What's wrong with you?" the human woman asked. "Are you daft?"

Cassy exploded. "Get out of my face, human! Or do I look like a woman who wants to be asked if she is DAFT?"

The woman had paled and flinched back, her eyes going to the guards who were standing on the other side of the market place.

A strong hand grabbed Cassys elbow, and Fenris voice said: "I apologize for her behavior. Excuse us!"

And with these words he simply pulled her away before the human could do anything else. The little boy with the hazel eyes – obviously her son – stared at Cassy with big eyes, and suddenly she felt ashamed that she had not been able – again – to control her temper.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" the Elven warrior asked once they had left the market place.

"What the hell is wrong with her?" she replied and pointed into the direction of the market place. "I was just standing there…"

"… and observing me?"

"No… I was just…"

He raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms in front of his chest.

"I just wanted to give you something you seem to have forgotten!" she added, grabbed his hand and pressed the money into it. "Here!"

He had tensed when she had touched him and was looking at the coins. "I just wanted to thank you."

"You wanted to insult me!"

"Don't be absurd." He sounded irritated.

"Absurd? Obviously you don't know much about life in the alienage, Prick! We might not have a lot, but what we have, we share. And we don't ask for anything in return!"

He was silent for a moment, than he closed his fingers over the money and said: "I…"

"You apologize. Yes, I know. But you know what: I think you did not really mean it friendly when you put the money on my table. You just have been a coward!"

He frowned. "And what should I have feared?"

She smiled into his face and answered: "Me!"

He stared at her, and she was completely clueless about what he was thinking. Then he chuckled and shook his head, a small, but sincere smile appearing on his lips. "You are exhausting, Cassalia Tabris!"

Her own smile changed into a grin. "But I am right, aren't I?"

"About me being afraid of you? No. But you are right about your assumption that I wanted to… avoid you."

She pressed her hands to her heart. "That is not very nice. I am heart-stricken."

Now he snorted. "After our little argument I thought it would be better to leave for good. And I was not sure if you would let me…"

"… so you decided walking off without a word? How very thoughtful of you…"

His face became serious. "Even if you don't want to hear it, I apologize. It was …", he hesitated and was so very obviously searching for the right words that she had to grin again, "… interesting to meet you."

"Interesting is a good start", she answered, shouldered her luggage and started to walk. "We can work on changing this to "fantastic" or "exhilarating" while travelling together!"

"We are NOT going to travel together, Cassalia!"

"Well, I am traveling into the same direction like you, so it will become difficult to avoid it", was all she answered. "And don't call me like that. I HATE it!"

"But it is your name!"

"It is a stupid name!"

"That your parents have given to you!"

"Well, I have never said that they had a good taste."

It was silent for a moment, and she looked at him over her shoulder. He was following her and frowning, but there was also a thoughtful look on his face.

"What is it?" she asked involuntarily. Why was it so damn important to her what he was thinking?

"You should be thankful that you remember the persons who have given you your name. And that you know where you come from." He sounded calm.

Now it was on her to be silent for a moment. When she started talking, her voice sounded oddly gentle in her own ears. "You… don't remember that?"

"No."

"Why?"

He shrugged. "That is a long story…"

"Well, then it is good that we will have a lot of time to talk about it, isn't it?"


	5. Masquerade

"Well, then it is good that we will have a lot of time to talk about it, isn't it?"

She continued walking without looking what he did. But she had a good hearing, therefore she heard the moment he set himself in motion and was following her.

It was strange, but the fact that she seemed to have convinced him pleased her. Normally people could not wait to get rid of her. And although he had been the same, she obviously had convinced him that it might be worth travelling with her.

Or maybe he was simply annoyed and would try to lop off when the next dawn was rising.

She was slowing down when they passed the Chantry. There were a lot of templars present in Denerim since the chantry in Kirkwall had exploded and the Fereldan circle had started to fight for its own freedom. Cassy did not know a lot about these things, but she knew that years ago Varania and the boy would not have had any problems living in the alienage without being captured by the templars. Now they had become extremely vigilant and also sometimes hostile.

The problem was: In the night when she had helped Varania to flee, she had distracted the templars. And even though it had been dark, she could not say how much they had seen of her face.

She tried not to look nervous, but she was. The templars all looked the same to her: There was no chance to find out how they looked, if they were angry or bored, if they were alive at all. The two who were guarding the entrance to the chantry stood motionless, and she had the feeling that they were watching her every step.

"Are you alright?" Fenris asked. He seemed to feel that she was stressed.

"I am fine. Let's just get out of here…"

Another templar appeared, although his armor differed significantly from those of the others. On his breastplate the symbol of a sun was shown, with a carved eye in the center.

The man did not wear any helmet and was watching his surroundings. Obviously he was important as the other templars tensed and saluted.

His eyes fell on Fenris and herself… and narrowed.

Not good…

"We should go", she said calmly.

Fenris seemed to have recognized as well that they had somehow caught his attention.

"Agreed", was all he said and they went around the corner.

The gate which led to another part of the city was directly in front of them. Guards stood bored next to it and watched the people passing by.

Behind them heavy footsteps suddenly approached.  
Fenris and she exchanged a look. "What have you done?" he growled.

"Lyrium Elf!" rumbled a loud voice behind them. "Stop!"

She raised an eyebrow: "Shouldn't the question be: What have YOU done…?"

He did not have the time to answer as the templars were approaching them quickly, and the attention of the guards was captured as well.

Fenris shifted his weight, lifted his hand to his weapon… and started to glow.

"And you ask me if I am crazy?" she hissed, grabbed his hand and dragged him with her into a small side street.

The templars started to shout and to ran, and their leader barked: "Get him! Alive!"

Cassy did not ask any further questions, but started running. "Follow me!"

Unfortunately she did not know this part of the city very well, but still she was able to make sure that Fenris and she were always some steps before their followers. But whenever she went around a corner, she saw him glowing out of the corner of her eye. "Can't you stop that?"

"What?"

"The glowing! We have to get out of here without getting even more attention, and you are not helping…" She stopped abruptly and cursed.

Dead End… and the templars had nearly caught up with them.

"Then we fight!" Fenris growled and drew his sword.

"Are you kidding?" she asked breathlessly. Damn, why wasn't he out of breath at all…?

But there was no time to answer the question. She had to take care of the situation… and one furious, glowing elf.

"Help me up!"

He did it without hesitation, even though he must fear that he then might have to face the templars alone. When she was on the wall, she hold out her hands: "Come on!"

He shook his head and changed his stance to face his enemies, turning his back to her. "You won't be able to pull me up!"

"If you let your sword where it is, I can do it. I am strong…"

"Never!" he growled and grabbed the damn sword more firmly.

She froze and stared at the back of his head. The weapon meant something to him. So much that he was not willing to give it up. And his faith in his fighting skills was big enough that he was willing to take the risk.

Stupid.

But also impressive.

And damn sexy. Even though he still was a prick.

With a sigh she jumped back into the street, landed next to him and drew the daggers her mother had passed on to her.

"Cassy!" he growled warningly. "Don't…"

"Ah, and finally you know my name…", was all she answered before turning to the templars.

They had nearly arrived. And from the sound of their steps they were many. Too many.

One of them had to reasonable. What an irony that this time it was her.

She had seen the small opening between the house and the wall before, but had not really thought about it of being an escape. Anyway, Fenris and herself were both elves and much thinner than human men, especially when they were wearing heavy armor. It HAD to fit.

Without warning she bashed against him and pushed him between house and wall.

"What are you doing?" he hissed, completely taken by surprise.

"MOVE!"

"Are you crazy?" He seemed to repeat himself today. "There is not enough space!"

"Then suck in your stomach!"

"Cassy", he barked, but finally tried to move. She continued pushing and knew that only with her help they were able to reach the other side of the house. His armor scrapped over the wall, and he was constantly cursing in a language she did not know. When they had reached the other side, she already heard the templars surrounding the house, grabbed Fenris hand and dragged him between the laundry of the neighbor house which was drying outside.

"Don't you think they will look here?" he growled.

"Not if you are calm", she answered, "and STOP GLOWING!"

"I can't!"

"Stubborn elf", she hissed and embraced him due to the lack of a better idea. "Arms flat on your body!" she whispered. "And lower your head!"

He had tensed but did as she asked.

The templars passed the house. Looked into the opening they had used to get on the other side. If they were careful, they would look here as well, but Cassy hoped that they would not expect them to be so brazen to stay nearby.

And she was right.

"They can't be far gone!" one of them said. "Find them! I don't want to have any problems with the seeker!"

Cassy breathed a sigh of relieve when the sound of their steps were finally softening.

Then she realized how close she was to Fenris: Her tights were pressed against his', and his warm breath ran over the skin on her neck. She shivered involuntarily, and it had nothing to do with their successful escape.

"You can let me go now", he dryly said.

She closed her eyes to calm herself, but did not hesitate one second with her answer, choosing the same words he had used to describe herself only some hours ago. "Sorry. I just wanted to make sure that your impulsive and blindfolded behavior is over…"

Making a step back, she looked into his eyes, even though her cheeks were still colored. His smug expression had changed after her words to an annoyed one, and she was glad to see it as it would distract him from her momentary insanity of finding him attractive…

"So", she asked. "What now? What have you done to grab the attention of this Seeker? Who is he anyway?"

Fenris pressed his lips together. "I can only anticipate what might be the reason for his behavior."

She rolled her eyes. "Could you please use words even a stupid alienage girl understands?"

"Sure." He smiled at her. "But don't hide you light under a bushel."

"Very funny", she answered ineloquently, but had to hide a smile. She liked the fact that he was so quick on the trigger. Normally most people just ignored her comments or frowned.

"I was living in Kirkwall for the last years", he explained. "And… I was… I am a close friend to the Champion."

Her eyes widened. Even in the alienage they had heard about what had happened in Kirkwall six months ago. The champion was a mage who had freed the local circle and declared its autonomy.

"Wow", was all she could say. "No wonder this templar-seeker guy does not like to see you here. He probably thinks the Champion has sent you to start another revolution…"

"Possible", he answered dryly, "although absolutely absurd."

She frowned. "Why?"

"Because I don't like mages."

She raised an eyebrow. "Yet you helped to free a whole circle."

"It happened more out of coincidence."

"WHAT?" She laughed. "How can something like this happen out of coincidence?

He shrugged. "It's a long story."

She rolled her eyes. "Oh, I heard that before. Anyway: We should try to get out of the city. But before", she watched him critically; "you have to change your clothes."

He frowned, but she ignored him, watched the laundry instead… and started to smile widely.

"What about this one?" she asked innocently and dragged a green woman's dress from the rope. "It would really suit your eyes…"

He frowned and said: "Very funny."

She crooked her head a bit to the side and bit on her lip. "Honestly, Fenris, if you add a hood and put your sword aside – and change your stance – you might also be…"

"Are you saying that I look like a woman?" He sounded more irritated than all the times before she had called him a prick, and she had to choke her laugh.

"NO! No, of course not, your highness. Well, but elves ARE slender, and it is still relatively dark, so…"

"No way I am going to wear a dress, woman!"

"Oh, now it is woman? It looks as if you are not only a prick, but also an arrogant prick who thinks that women aren't equal to men…" She crossed her arms in front of her chest and did her best to hide her amusement.

He stared at her and looked not only furious, but also kind of distressed.

A laugh burst out of her. Actually she laughed so hard that tears came to her eyes. His own eyes were narrowing, than he grabbed the men's clothes next to him and went behind a sheet to change.

"Don't be angry, Fenris. I was only joking. You are of course extremely manly", what he was indeed, "and no way anybody could think you are a woman". No one would ever think something like that. You had to be blind to see anything else than a gorgeous Elven man in him…

Damn it, why can't she stop thinking like that about him…?

Well, the reason became obvious in the very same moment: When he started to glow again – quite obviously he was NOT amused – and his outlines became clearly visible behind the sheet. His moves were choppy and angry, but that did not change the fact that he was trained and muscular for an elf. And his profile was… nice. Noble. Like the profile of a … prick.

"Have you lost your voice?" he asked.

She cleared her throat while looking somewhere else. "Only in your dreams."

He chuckled and sounded less angry. "Believe me, I would remember such a pleasant dream…"

Before she could find a good answer to that statement, he already appeared again in front of her and put his armor pieces into his baggage. He wore a simple leather trouser and a linen shirt, both a bit too big, but it would work. All they needed to find was a hood to hide his markings and his hair. Unfortunately none was here…

"What about you?" he asked.

"What is about me?", was all she answered with a frown.

He nodded into the direction of her leather tunic and the trousers. "You should change as well", he added, took the green dress and threw it into her arms. Then he said innocently: "It suits your eyes…"


	6. Past

He nodded into the direction of her leather tunic and the trousers. "You should change as well", he added, took the green dress and threw it into her arms. Then he said innocently: "It suits your eyes…"

Fair enough, she thought while grabbing the dress and making a face. Then she went behind the sheet and changed into the dress. She was too slender for it – obviously it belonged to a human woman – and Fenris raised an eyebrow when she appeared again.

She turned her back to him. "Help my tying it down", she ordered.

Silence, followed by a dry: "Your wish is my command, Mylady!"

When he started to pull on the tie fastening, his movements were practical and efficient… and she nearly lost her breath. "Do you want me to die?" she choked.

"No", he answered, "but to calm down for a moment."

"Look who's talking. I remember you cursing permanently when I saved your live!"

"I would not have died."

"Oh", was all she answered while turning back to him. The dress was still too long, as well as the sleeves, but at least it was not dangling anymore around her body. "I forgot that you are inviolable…", her eyes went to his markings and she felt herself frowning. "Your aren't inviolable, are you…?"

He chuckled. "No. But I have fought nearly all my life and faced templars more than one time before…"

"When you involuntarily helped to free the circle of Kirkwall…?"

He pressed his lips together and went silent, suddenly unwilling to talk even more about his past. "It's time to go. I have to find Varania!"

Well, it seemed that his friendly and teasing behavior was over. He had become again the grumpy looking warrior she had met only one day before. Strange that she had the feeling to know him much longer than that. At least she understood that letting somebody close was not what he did easily… and quickly.

They remained silent while walking side by side into the direction of the city gates. The people on the next market place were busier than those nearby the chantry, standing at the booths and bargaining with the merchants. Cassy told Fenris to wait in the shadows and bought him a hood. Fortunately a gentle rain was falling, so he did not look suspicious… apart from his way of moving. And scowling.

Growling as well.

Oh, and not to forget the glowing…

"Why are you grinning?" he asked warily.

"Oh… never mind. Come. Let's go…"

She stopped abruptly when templars appeared on the other side of the market place and  
made an announcement: That they were looking for an Elven warrior with strange markings who was a companion of the Champion of Kirkwall and therefore an enemy of the Chantry. Whoever helped him made himself an enemy as well.

Cassy und said Elven warrior exchanged a look.

"I don't believe that", she said. "How can it be that there is always something happening when you are near…?"

He sighed. "As companion of the Champion of Kirkwall I can tell you: Welcome to my world…"

She did not ask what he meant, although she was more than a bit curious to find out more about him. Instead, they silently moved in the shadows nearby and watched two templars talking to the people while the rest was leaving… directly into direction of the city gates.

"Shit. They are going to guard the gates!"

"What have you expected?" he growled. "That they only tell the people to pay attention and then go back into the chantry to pray?"

She shot him an angry glance. "Excuse me, your highness, but I am not familiar with hiding from templars and plotting with revolutionaries…"

"I am NO revolutionary…!"

"Well, they seem to think otherwise…"

He growled something which sounded like Anders.

She frowned and whispered: "What is an Anders?"

"A mage."

"One of those you freed?"

"No. He is the one who blew up the chantry in Kirkwall."

She froze and looked speechlessly into his face. That was… not good.

"You should go!" he added more calmly. "It's too dangerous for you staying with me."

At first she was kind of flattered that he seemed to care about her security, but then her eyes narrowed. "Are you trying to get rid of me again?"

He sighed. "Cassalia…"

"It's Cassy…"

She gasped when he suddenly pulled her deeper into the shadows and saw why: The templars came directly into their direction, and there was nowhere for them to go without grabbing their attention.

Fenris tensed while his hand already went for his sword.

She grabbed it and put it on her hip. "There are other ways", was all she said, wrapped one leg around his waist and pulled him closer. "And keep your hands to yourself, prick!"

There was nothing he could do as the templars had nearly arrived. But he was tense as a stone, so she whispered: "Can't you at least TRY to look passionately? When you stay like this they are going to think that I am molesting you and will come to your help. What lets me think again that you have indeed a bit of a woman in you…"

He pressed against her, and suddenly not one, but two legs were around his waist and his fingers not only on her hips, but lower… much lower. His breath, warm and pleasant, tangled with hers.

"Better?"

Much better…. Of course she did not say anything like that, but wrapped instead her arms around his neck and kept track of the templars, her face partially hidden in his hair and hood. One of them looked into their direction, but immediately the other way. Then they were gone.

"Alright, you can let go of me now", she whispered, and he gently put her to the ground.

She cleared her throat and made a step back.

He did exactly the same. For some seconds an awkward silence followed, interrupted by his rough voice: "I apologize."

She raised an eyebrow. "Why?"

"For touching you in such an inappropriate way."

She shook her head, irritated. "But I asked you to do so? What is the problem…?"

He pressed his lips together and answered nothing, but looked instead back at the market place, a frustrated frown on his face.

She really did not understand him. One time he seemed to be a know-it-all, and in the next moment he appeared to be kind of insecure. As if he did not really know how to behave casually when dealing with strangers.

"You have a vision in your head how it is the right way to behave, right?"

"Excuse me?" He looked at her again, irritated.

"A vision", she repeated. "And whenever you do something that makes your behavior differ from it, you think of it as inadequate?"

His frown became deeper. "I have standards, yes."

"Standards?" Her eyebrow rose. "So it is not your standard hiding with a woman in the shadows and making out?"

"At least not with a completely unknown woman", he answered dryly. "And another standard is not talking with a completely unknown woman about making out in the shadows."

"So maybe doing it would help to overcome your issues?" She had no idea where THAT had come from.

"I don't see the need in overcoming anything", was all he answered while watching her with narrowed eyes. "Why do we have this argument anyway?"

She was not sure about it herself, but somehow his way of apologizing himself all the time – in this polite, prick-like manner – got on her nerves. She felt stupid when he did it, and she also had the feeling that he acted more like himself when he simply did not think at all.

There might be another time to discuss this idea, but not now.

"Never mind. Let's concentrate on finding a way out of here."

He nodded. „We should wait for the night, and then…"

"And then what? They will be even more vigilant in the night. No", she shook her head. "There has to be another way…"

They were both considering the different options they had, and in the end Cassy always came back to one and the same idea.

An idea she did not like at all. But she saw no other option.

"Alright", she sighed. "Follow me."

"What's your plan?" he asked warily, but did as he was told.

"I have a … contact which might be able to help us get out of the city…"

"A contact?"

"Yes…"

He frowned. "What are you hiding?"

"Look, just wait and see by yourself, alright? It's… difficult to explain…"

He looked more than a bit skeptical, but stayed calm while following her through the streets. When they approached her goal, he raised an eyebrow and gave her a side glance, but did not say anything.

She opened the door to The Pearl, Denerim's biggest brothel, without hesitation, even though everything within her rebelled against it. She had never been here before, and she definitely had never planned to go here.

Well, things changed…

The smell of perfume and other things filled her senses, and she had to force herself not to turn around and leave.

A dark haired woman approached them when they entered the main room. "Welcome", she said with professional voice while watching Fenris and herself carefully. "My name is Sanga. What can I do for you?"

Suddenly Cassys voice did not work anymore. This place was so damn embarrassing…

"We are looking for someone", Fenris helped.

"I see", Sanga said patiently. "One of my girls, or one of my boys?"

Fenris watched Cassy expectantly. He did not seem to be embarrassed at all.

"Tara", she finally managed to say.

Sanga nodded and went to her book. "The two of you?"

Cassy closed her eyes, than simply nodded. When Sanga named the price, she gulped. Unbelievable, that people were really willing to pay such a price for… this.

"Here's the money"; Fenris calmly said and gave it to the woman. "Which room?"

"The third one on the right. You have one hour."

"Thanks." He took Cassy by her elbow and dragged her with him.

"You seem to be familiar with such an… environment", she squeezed out.

He simply shrugged. "Hawke had sometimes business to do in the Kirkwall brothel." When he saw her raised eyebrow, he added with a little smirk: "Not this kind of business. It is just a place, Cassy. And I guess we are not looking for this woman to share the bed with her, are we?"

"Of course not!" she hissed. "It's just… I don't understand how someone can sell himself like this." She waved with her hand.

"And yet you know such a woman." They arrived at the door to the room Sanga had mentioned. "Anything I need to know before going in there?"

She pressed her lips together. "Only that you might need to hold me back from punching her into her face…", she finally said and opened the door.

* * *

_I think I maybe talk a little bit about Fenris' "background" in this story and my own headcanon about him:_

_Fenris and Hawke are close friends, although the basis of their relationship is rivalry. Devon Hawke is an aggressive-sarcastic mage, but he also always fought for Fenris rights and never let him down._

_Devons LI is Isabela, therefore Fenris had neither the possibility to make sexual experiences with Hawke, nore with Isabela._

_So what he has learned within his seven years in Kirkwall is to trust his friends, but he is still kind of "withdrawn" from the world. And now it is the first time that he is doing something pro-actively and out of his own decision. So far he was always reacting, no matter if fleeing from Danarius or following Hawke._

_Last but not least: In my head canon Fenris has ONLY been Danarius bodyguard and nothing else. So he never experienced sexual violation, but what he might have seen... who knows_


	7. Irritation

Cassalia pressed her lips together. "Only that you might need to hold me back from punching her into her face…"

Fenris was not sure what to make out of this statement, but he was curious.

And normally he was NEVER curious. Sometimes interested, most of the times annoyed. But never really curious.

Mynari had told him that he had been different when he was younger. He had met his childhood friend during his visit in Tevinter, when he had been looking together with Hawke and Isabela for Varania. Although he had not recognized the Elven servant in the house of his former master, he had felt some kind of … closeness to her. And during her travel back to Kirkwall and the time afterwards, she had told him a lot about his former self.

Absurdly, he had been some kind of womanizer. And he had been lively, open-minded and curious.

So the complete opposite to the man he was today.

An Elven woman laid on the bed, only wearing a whiff of nothing, while her long, dark hair was spilled around her. She raised an eyebrow when she recognized Cassalia, looking at her out of purple-blue eyes.

She was beautiful. Yet Fenris could not stand her. A beautiful face meant nothing.

"Look who's there…", she said and played with strands of her hair. "If that isn't Cassalia Tabris. I have to admit, my dear… I am surprised to see you here…" Her eyes went to Fenris. "But I am even more surprised to see you in the company of such a handsome elf. Tell me, gorgeous one, what did she pay you to come with her to this place…?"

"Shut up", was all Cassy said. "You know that I would NEVER EVER come to this place if I had not a good reason. We paid for your… services. Meaning you have to do whatever we want, right?"

Tara raised an eyebrow and stood up, approaching them with sensual movements.

"Well, that still depends on the kind of service you are asking for, Cassalia. But I am… open for a lot of things."

Cassys spine went rigid. Her jaw tensed, and her hands became fists. She really hated being here, and he suddenly had the feeling that there was more about the relationship between the two of them then simply dislike for what Tara was doing.

"Don't play games, Tara", Cassy growled. "I don't have time for this. I know that there is a tunnel leading directly from the wood nearby Denerim to The Pearl. I heard one of you guests talking about it once. In former times it was used so that rich, MARRIED man could visit one of their whores while officially being on the hunt." Every word dripped of despisement.

There was only a slight change in Taras stand, but Fenris saw it. She became vigilant, although her face betrayed nothing. "Why are you looking for it?"

Cassy smiled widely. "Let's just say you don't want us to be here longer than necessary. For your own security..."

Taras eyes became small. "You know that I could call for our guards."

"Fenris", Cassy answered without looking at him. "Would you mind showing Tara your little glowing trick?"

He sighed. "I can't…"

Now she looked at him. "What? Why?"

"I am not furious enough", he answered and shrugged.

Tara laughed. "I have no idea what is going on here, Cassalia, but you are still such a damn freak! And no matter how gorgeous he looks like, he seems to be exactly as freaky as you are…"

And suddenly glowing seemed to be no problem at all for Fenris…

„Shit!" Tara flinched and stumbled backwards, her mouth opening to cry. At the same time Fenris moved so quickly that Cassy could nearly not see it. One moment he stood next to her, and the next moment his hand was over Taras mouth and she was thrown onto the bed.

"Be calm", he growled. "Nothing is going to happen to you. Just tell us where the tunnel is!"

Taras eyes were wide and her skin pale. Cassy had the feeling she would pass out every moment, but then the exact opposite happened: Her eyes became small, and her legs came around his waist.

It took Fenris completely by surprise when she pulled him down on her and whispered: "You know, I like it a little bit rough in bed. And I like the way you smell…"

"You stupid BITCH!" Now Cassy moved quicker than she had ever done before, pushed Fenris to the side and slapped the other woman into her face. "Get your traitorous hands off him!"

Tara had frozen, but now she was becoming very vivid and started to fight her, with her nails and her damn teeth. "You stupid cow! Get away from me! It's all YOUR fault that I am here…"

"My fault?" Cassy hissed. "Are you nuts? You went here VOLUNTARILY because the life in the alienage wasn't good enough for you!"

"It only became worse after what Soris and you did!"

Cassy froze and moved away from the other woman. She could not believe what she had just heard.

"You have told the guards where he and I were hiding!" she said calmly and accusingly.

"YES!" Tara hissed nastily. "I did it to bring this whole absurdity to an end!"

Cassy simply snapped, but before she could charge and show the damn bitch how ABSURD she could be, Fenris pulled one of her daggers and knocked the other woman with its pommel out. Again she had not seen it coming, and neither had Tara who dropped unconsciously to the bed.

"What have you done?"

"I made sure that the two of you would not kill each other", he said dryly.

"But now she cannot tell us where the damn tunnel is!"

He scowled at her. "Do you think she would have told us while being choked by you?"

She pressed her lips together. "I would only have choked her a little bit..."

He shook his head and watched her intensely. "Are you even sure that this tunnel exists?"

"Why should somebody talk about it if it wasn't the truth?" she answered furiously. "The times in which human man had the great dignity to go to a brothel in private are long ago…" He sighed, and she frowned. "What?"

"Do you have to make out of everything such a drama?"

"Drama? Listen, Prick, if not for me you would still be in the city and play cat and mouse with the templars. So do you really think that it is a good idea to insult me?" Oh, she was furious. Really furious. And she still had the desire to punch somebody. "And don't you dare to apologize now", she hissed when he started to say something in return.

He stayed calm… and then he really had the nerves to smirk.

That did it. Part of her knew that she was behaving irrationally, but as always she could not stop herself and tried to let her fantasy of punching someone come true.

Her pity – and his luck – that he was so quick. Within seconds he grabbed her, spinned her around and pinned her arm to her chest while pressing against her back. "Relax!" was all he said and did not even sound breathlessly or furiously at all.

Relax? How the hell should she relax while this bitch was lying on the bed, while he was behaving so damn rationally… and was so damn close? Neither the material of her dress, nor of his shirt avoided that she could feel the warmth and hardness and strength of his body. Normally it was always herself who was head and shoulder above the rest when it came to speed and strength, even – or even especially – over other Elven man. The fact that he had been able to overcome her so easily was annoying.

But also thrilling.

And suddenly her anger changed into something completely else.

Damn it, why did she have to be so erratic? One moment she had the wish to punch him, and the very next the urge to lay him in a good and proper way.

That was not her at all. She did not take these things casually. Intimacy… it was always dangerous and made you vulnerable, so she had only allowed very few men in her life to come so close. And none of them had been like he was.

He seemed to sense the change in her stand, as his grasp at her arms became loose. "Calm again?"

Calm? No, not exactly, especially not when he treated her like a child and did not seem to have any reaction at all at her nearness.

Her first reaction was to simply move away and shake his hands off, but then she reconsidered.

Well, to be honest she did not reconsider anything at all, she simply reacted and angled her head to look at him over her shoulder.

He tensed when she did it, and his hold was becoming more firmly again. Her faces were from one moment to the other close… really close. So close that she could feel his breath ghosting over her lips.

Tara might be a bitch, but she had been right about one thing: He really smelled good.

For a very short moment they stayed in this position, both completely motionless. Then he let her go, and she moved away from him, suddenly remembering that she was neither a temptress, nor a beautiful woman he probably wasn't able to resist. She was simply… herself, and unfortunately that had never been enough for anyone in the past.

"Alright", she managed to say without looking at him. "The tunnel. He has to be somewhere in the cellar. So let's try it the traditional way: Searching for it!"

He nodded and opened the door. She was not sure, but she had the feeling that his skin was a little darker than before.

When she saw him waiting next to the door, she stopped and looked at him confused, than realized that he indeed held the door open for her.

"You… you are so damn strange, Prick", was all she could murmur, than she went past him and left the room.

He followed her outside. "I don't like it when you call me like that, Cassalia!"

She tensed, than sighed. "Point taken. It's just… you are really irritating."

"So are you."

She gave him a side glance and saw that he did not watch her, but observed the empty hallway in front of them instead.

"Do you know where the entrance to the cellar is?" he asked.

"Well, let's think…. No? I haven't been here before. Unlike you I have not regularly visited a brothel before."

Now he was giving her a side glance. "As I said, it wasn't for amusement."

"Sure." Steps could be heard in front of them, and a man cleared his throat. If it was one of the guars he would wonder why they weren't in one of the rooms and probably take a closer look…

This time Fenris and she had the same thought at the same time, and when he pushed her against the wall and she wrapped her arms around his neck, it did not feel so strange anymore. Actually it started feeling… familiar.

Out of the corner of her eyes she saw that it was really one of the guards appearing around the corner.

Fenris brought is lips to her neck.

Her eyes closed, and she involuntarily pulled him closer and felt his body settle more firmly against hers. What was it that made her behave in his presence even more irrationally than she normally did?

The guard chuckled and left them alone.

It was definitely time that she started to say something cheeky instead of blushing like a virgin every time he had touched her.

"You seem to enjoy making out with a nearly unknown woman at last…"

He gently let her down and answered: "There are worse thinks than holding a beautiful woman in your arms…"

They both froze at the same time: He because he obviously had not thought before talking and Cassy because she could not believe what she'd just heard. She knew that he was not mocking her, because even though she only had met him some hours ago, he had always been honest.

Well, now she was REALLY blushing.

And for once speechless.


	8. Darkness

Well, now she was REALLY blushing.

And for once speechless.

„I…. you…" Oh my, now he had also brought her to stumble over her own words. " Oh please, that is such a… prick-like saying…"

He had seemed a bit embarrassed as well, but now he was raising an eyebrow. "You think it is prick-like to tell you that you are beautiful?"

"I…. Oh, forget it. Just let's get this over with and find a way out of here."

She turned and therefore could not see his reaction on her words anymore. Frowning, smirking, all was possible. Somehow he was as unpredictable as she was, in a calmer, more catlike manor. As if always ready to pounce, drag her to the ground… and have his way with her…

Oh, come on Cassy. Calm down again…

Luckily the door to the cellar appeared directly behind the corner and was unclosed. Silently Fenris and herself moved downstairs and passed some store rooms where they grabbed a hand lantern to lighten their way.

The sound of feminine footsteps caught their attention, and they saw Sanga come to pass the store room in which they were hiding. Only one minute later the woman came back, accompanied by a human man who gave her money.

A scraping sound could be heard while both disappeared. The same sound Cassy had heard shortly before Sanga and the man went back upstairs.

Fenris and she moved like one person, rushing out of the store room, and saw a stone wall at the end of the next room glide to the side. A mechanical sound could be heard.

"Shit", Cassy shouted and started to sprint.

"Cassy!"

She did not react, but jumped through the narrow opening between wall and secret door and threw herself to the side to make space for Fenris. While doing it, the lantern slipped from her hands… and smashed on the floor. The last thing she saw was Fenris landing catlike next to her, than it became dark.

"Shit", she hissed. "The damn lantern..."

"… is broken", he ended her sentence tensely. " I have not only heard it, but I can also feel it. I stepped on some of the pieces."

"Oh…" She remembered that he was not wearing any shoes… "I am sorry. Is it bad?"

"Don't worry. Let's just move on."

She nodded although it was pitch-black, than started to follow the corridor by touching the wall. Fenris was directly behind her, silent like a ghost.

"You know, your glowing trick would be really helpful now …", she eventually said.

It started to glow behind her.

"Hey, I thought this is only working when you are angry?" she laughed and turned around to him. "You aren't angry now, are you…?"

She stopped abruptly when she saw his face: It was pale, his lips pressed together, and a thin sheet of sweat covered his face. When she lowered her eyes, she was not really surprised to see that he had lied to her for the first time… but she was more than shocked to realize what a good liar he could be, because his feet were full of blood.

"Are you crazy?" was all she managed to say, and it sounded a bit hysterically. "Why haven't you said anything?!"

"I did not think… that it would be so worse…"

"Ever heard about adrenaline?" she hissed. "Aren't you long enough a warrior to know that you should check an injury instead of ignoring it?" Furiously she pointed at the ground. "Sit down!"

He pressed his lips together, but then did as he was told. His movements were careful while sliding down the wall of the corridor.

She kneeled next to him and started to inspect his feet. "Give me your water bottle!"

He obeyed, and she opened the bottle. "Dressing material?"

After scanning their baggage he shook his head. "There is none."

"What? Why? I also have none, but at least I did not expect to go on a journey…"

"I… guess I have never needed it and therefore forgot it."

"You have never been injured?" She raised an eyebrow. "Are you kidding? You don't have to play the unfearful and unvincible warrior anymore to impress me…"

He snorted, and then flinched when she was not so careful anymore by withdrawing the slivers.

"I never needed dressing material because there was always a mage nearby to heal me." While shaking his head he chuckled darkly. "I never really understood… until now."

"Understood what?" she asked while continuing to treat the wound.

"That I never have been able to escape magic. And that at some point… I did not want to do it anymore. At least not as much as I once had…"

She did not fully understand what he meant, but did not ask further questions when he became silent again. Step by step… She was no patient woman, but she understood that this warrior had to be treated carefully.

"Do you want to tell me what this is all about between Tara and you?" he asked.

She shrugged and shortened her dress to her knees with one of her knives. "Tara and I…. we never came along very well. She was the sweetheart of the alienage, loved by everyone, while I was always the little troublemaker." Carefully she started to clean his wounds. "When we became older, she was becoming… discontent. She realized that being together with the most popular Elven boy wasn't so interesting and promising anymore. They all could not offer her what she deserved… at least that was what I heard her saying to one of her friends once."

Fenris was listening attentively to her words and was relaxing. Normally that would have been fine, but not when relaxing also meant that his markings started to glow weaker and weaker…

Cassy pressed a bit harder against his foot. He flinched, and the markings came to life again.

She gave him a rueful smile and then continued. "Anyway, when my cousin Soris and I helped to free some other Elves who had been taken by nobles and… mistreated badly, she had seen where we had been hiding… and had told the guards. Only afterwards I have found out that the guard captain had been her lover, but her betrayal did not make him leave his wife for her. " She gave him another glance while a sly smile formed on her lips. "Apart from that, they had not been able to catch us. We were too quick…. and they too silly."

He chuckled. "That does not surprise me. But it explains why you have been so furious." His eyes met hers. "Thank you, Cassalia Tabris, for bringing me here and overcoming your pride, only to help me. That… it is unexpected."

That expression on his face… She had seen it before, this look which reminded her a bit of a puppy.

Apart from the fact that it again brought a lot of inappropriate thoughts to her mind…

"You are welcome", she forced herself to say and then continued treating his other feet. "And now concentrate on continuing to glow. If it helps, I can make you angry again because I think hurting you all the time is not really an option." She watched him through strands of her hair. "Or are there any other ways to make them glow…?"

He stared at her, than crooked his head slightly to the side. "So far I only made these two experiences. "

"Mmm… so they always start to glow because of negative feelings?"

He thought about it for a moment, then shrugged and answered: "I guess it's more about intense feelings."

And suddenly she had again a lot of inappropriate thoughts in her mind…

"I see", she quickly said and continued treating his other feet, inwardly cursing that her hair was braided at the sides of her face and therefore she could not hide her blushing – again.

She felt his eyes on her, intently. "Are you alright?"

"Yes, sure."

"I mean… you seem to be a bit shivery…"

Her head flew up. Was he teasing her?

He smirked. Just a little bit. And he also looked quite pleased.

Prick!

Her first reflex was to treat him again a bit more roughly, but then she decided otherwise and pulled his foot more firmly in her lap. "Alright, let's see…" Carefully she reached for the markings on the back of his foot and let her fingers slightly run over it. "Do you feel that?"

It was calm for a long moment, and she started to wonder what the hell she was doing. But backing off would have been even more awkward, so she simply did it again, this time more firmly. "Maybe like this…"

The markings started to glow more intensively, and he pulled his foot back.

"Did I hurt you?" Now she was looking at him.

He watched his foot, a strange expression on his face. "No." His voice sounded strange as well, a bit hoarse. "I think it is fine now. Let's search for the exit!"

She nodded and got up, not helping him because she knew he would hate it. At least she would hate if somebody would help her in a situation where she already was vulnerable.

Her eyes were still on his feet, but then went to her own legs which looked pale in the soft light of his markings. "I think we can use the darkness to change again into our regular clothes. We have to be quick and armed once we are outside again."

"True."

While they took the clothes out of their baggage, his glowing faded, and it went pitch black again.

For some minutes nothing else could be heard than the rustling of their clothes and their breathing. One time they touched involuntarily when reaching for their trousers, winced and continued changing their clothes.

Cassy was just about to close her light leather armor when the glowing started again.

"Are you alright?" she asked anxiously and turned around.

His face could hardly be seen, but if she would not have known better, she had said he was embarrassed.

"Yes", he said tightly.

She frowned. "Look, Fenris, I thought we had clarified that this is the wrong time for wrong pride…"

"I am fine", he answered harshly.

Well, now it was time to get furious again. "Are you? So tell me: Which kind of intense emotion is this time the reason for you changing into a firefly…?"

* * *

Fenris flinched and did not know where to look. Fact was: Neither pain, nor anger had been the reason for his glowing markings. But no way he would tell her the truth… or admit to himself that he maybe had thought a little bit too intensely about her changing into another clothes…

"Well?"

By Andraste, why could this woman not let things be?

"My feet are still aching", he finally managed to say and felt his face become hotter.

Was he blushing? He had never blushed before…

He eyes became narrow. "I don't believe you. I took care of them, but you are glowing even more intensively than when you stepped for the first time into the slivers and tried to hide that you are hurt."

Of course he was glowing even more intensely: This whole conversation and the reason why he originally started to glow was simply embarrassing!

"Let it be, Cassalia!" he growled.

"Ah, now it is Cassalia again", she hissed furiously and frowned. Whenever she did it – and she frowned regularly – a small wrinkle appeared between her brows which was kind of cute.

Cute? If he had not known better, he would have thought he had injured his head, and not his feet.

"Fenris", she stated more calmly and crossed her arms in front of her chest. "I need to know these things if we travel together and don't want to gain even more attention…"

"Well, I guess than it's better our ways separate once we are out of this tunnel", he murmured darkly before thinking about what he said. "I did not want you to come with me anyway. "

Silence followed. His markings were now full awake, but the reason was this time clearly rage… and disturbance. She confused him, as well as his feelings when looking at her. He only knew this woman for one day, but still her face seemed familiar. Her scar, the way she moved, the way she scowled… like now.

But she did not only look furious. For a short moment he also believed to see hurt, but then she was already turning around. "Fair enough. But let me tell you one thing: If you are really as determined to find your sister as you pretend to be, than you would not refuse my help, but be THANKFUL for it. You are a stranger in this country…"

"… and you never left the alienage. At least this is what Sinus has said. How could you help me?"

She flinched at his words, but did not stop walking. "Forget it. I was a fool to think that offering my help would be from any worth to you. No, wait", she whirled around, "YOU are a fool to REFUSE my help. And don't think that you can come back to me once you realize what an idiot you have been. You want to separate once we are out of here? Fine: We separate!"

The following silence was full of unsaid words. Fenris told himself that he did not need to have a bad conscience because she more or less had forced herself upon him. Anyway: She also had helped him, and without her he would now be probably interrogated by a Seeker…

Still: He had never asked her to do it. And he would not allow that gratitude would make him take her with him.

It was better when he continued his journey alone.


	9. Alone again

Cassy was alone again. Not that it mattered or felt unfamiliar. Since Soris had moved to Redcliff and her father had died, she had been alone most of the day. Shianni hat preferred staying at home while she loved being outside, but none of the other elves had really wanted to be with her.

Well, to be honest there had been one or two trying to approach her, but she had always been… not so nice to them.

She liked being alone.

What she did NOT like was being treated like a silly, clingy and intrusive girl. That was exactly what Fenris had pretended to see in her: A girl who had forced herself upon him.

_Well, actually you did, Cassy…_

_Oh, shut up…_ she answered the reasonable and unfamiliar voice in her head.

After leaving the tunnel – the entrance in the wood was hidden in the ruins of a decayed summer residence – they had separated. She had not waited or really looked at him, but simply taken her baggage and said: "I wish you luck, Prick!" Then she had gone and left him behind her.

She knew that she had behaved childish. But in this moment it had felt great to go and leave him behind without looking back.

Now she felt horrible and could not even say why. Yes, she might have had a small – a tiny – interest in the Elven warrior. And yes, she had also been attracted to him, but only a little, a tiny bit.

Ironically the thought concerning her most about travelling without him was that he could get into problems. It was absurd: He knew how to fight and defend himself. On the other hand he was so damn proud and stubborn and did not know when it was time to simply back off and swallow his pride.

She was also no expert in doing it. But sometimes you simply had no other chance if you wanted to survive…

*Forget it, Cassy* she told herself. *Forget him…*

Easier said than done.

With a sigh she looked at the map and saw that she had been aimlessly gone into the complete wrong direction. Her way brought her now deeper into the wood, but she had no desire to sleep next to wolves and bears, so she turned and went back to find one of the trails mentioned in the map. In this direction there also seemed to be a village, probably inhabited by woodcutters. She had seen the evidence of their work on her erratic way through the wood.

While approaching the village, she suddenly heard the voice of a child and then a deeper, raspy voice answering.

She tensed, than sneaked off to the place where the voices came from.

Cassy knew that it was Fenris who was speaking. She had never met a man with such a voice, and she had heard it a lot of times within the last hours, probably more than some of his own friends as he did not seem to be the most communicative person.

Actually that should have been a reason NOT to follow the voices. But she did it nevertheless.

"Boy", Fenris just said while she was hiding behind one of the trees and peeking at a clearing. The Elven warrior was standing in front of a young boy who looked at him suspiciously. "I am only a traveler who does not know this wood very well. So would you please tell me in which direction I have to go to find the shortest way to the east side of the wood?"

The boy, who was thin and pimply and about 10 years old, crossed his arms in front of his chest. "I could tell you", he answered smartly, "but first I want to know how I can get the same cool tattoos like you have!"

Fenris shook his head. "I already told you, there is no option that you will ever have the same ones. And believe me, you can be thankful for it."

The face of the young one darkened. "I don't believe you. The others always laugh about me because I am so weak, but with such cool tattoos they would not laugh anymore. So tell me!"

"No!" Fenris barked impatiently, then inhaled deeply when he saw the boy flinch and tried to save what could be saved. "Listen, boy, I would tell you if there was a way, but believe me, there is not…"

The eyes of the young one became narrow. "The oldest in the village will not like that a stranger is creeping around in the wood and stalking young boys…"

"Excuse me? I am neither creeping around, nor stalking. I am simply asking for a way…" Now Fenris sounded distressed, and Cassy knew why. His usual way of threatening people was with this child not applicable.

"They don't need to know", the young one answered sneakily, "just tell me what I need to know…"

Partly out of pity, but also because it was time to teach this boy manners, she appeared out of the wood. "Fenris, baby, here you are… I was looking everywhere for you…"

He tensed and glanced at her over his shoulder. She simply smiled at him, than looked at the boy: "Oh, look who's here. I think there is a girl searching for you…"

The boy froze and his cheeks became red. "A… girl?"

"Yes", she nodded. "Somebody with a name starting with S…. or was it C…"

"Sarah?" His voice was coming thick and fast, and he seemed to have problems to breathe.

"Ah, yes, that was the name", Cassy said. "She seemed to be nervous and exited…"

"I… I don't know…", was all he was able to say, than he stopped and trembled.

"Listen", she said conspiratorially, "we make a deal: You tell us which way to take, and I'll give you a tip how to win her over…"

He was a smart child and asked: "And how will I know that it works?"

She smiled. "I won HIM!" She nodded at Fenris. "And believe me, he was no easy prey…"

That seemed to convince the boy and he told them where to go. Afterwards Cassy told him that the best way of winning a woman's heart was to insult her and show her afterwards the cold shoulder. "She will be angry at first, but believe me, she won't stop thinking about why you don't like her. And then she will come to you…"

"Really?"

"Yes."

When the boy disappeared between the trees, Fenris stepped next to her and said: "This will never work…"

She shrugged. "Of course not, because he is an ugly, thin, know-it-all kind of child."

He chuckled. "He will tell them that we have been here…"

"He would have always told them, if only to show off. And we'll be long gone by then."

It was silent, then he asked: "We?"

She did not show any reaction, although she felt kind of caught. Again she had spoken before thinking. "I did not mean TOGETHER", she stated. "I thought I made myself clear. If you want us to travel together, you have to offer more than one of your apologies."

He frowned. "I don't see a reason to do that."

"Oh, than I obviously misinterpreted the HOPE in your voice when you just asked if we will be travelling together?"

"There was no hope."

"Bad luck for you", she answered and shrugged. "And good luck with the next young one who is bringing you to your social limits…"

Without another word she started to walk into the direction the young boy had mentioned.

She knew that he was following her, even though he waited some minutes. She also knew that this was ridiculous, walking in front and behind of each other, only some meters between them. But she would not be the one waiting for him…

When it went dark, she was looking for a place to spend the night and found a small clearing nearby. Hunting was no problem – she had trained herself in hunting rats and birds – but it took her some time to make fire.

The sound of steps let her look up. He was louder than he was normally walking, so he obviously wanted that she knew he was approaching.

"Fenris", she welcomed him.

"Cassalia."

She could not help herself but smile when she heard the tense sound in his voice. So she decided to make it easier for him and offered him a part of the bird's breast she had hunted before.

He hesitated, than took it and sat down next to her in front of the fire. "Thank you."

"You are welcome."

Silence followed, than he was speaking again. "I know you don't want to hear it, but I want to tell you nevertheless: I apologize for my behavior. You have been right: I should have been thankful for your help. Even though I have never asked for it."

She hid a smile. Of course he had to add the last words, but this time she did not get furious. Part of her understood him. She would have been the same.

"Sometimes you get help without asking for it", she said.

Again it was silent long for a long moment. "That is… quite new for me. I thought I had learned to accept it, but obviously I still have my problems with accepting it."

"Well", was all she answered while continuing eating. "Don't get used to it. I don't plan on making a habit out of it…"

He was just about to answer something, when a strange noise could be heard... and they both tensed simultaneously.

They were listening alertly and changed a glance when they heard something which sounded suspiciously like a painful moan.

Cassy rose silently and moved into the direction the sounds came from, drawing her weapons. Fenris was directly behind her, silent like a cat and fortunately not glowing.

Another moan, this time followed by a splashy sound.

Cassy started to move faster…. and stopped abruptly when she realized what had been the reason for the strange sounds.

A couple was lying on a small clearing and… well, was making love.

Passionately.

Completely naked.

And very explicit.

Cassy stared. She did not really want to look, but she also could not look somewhere else.

Damn, it was really time that she got laid again.

Out of the corner of her eyes a soft flicker of light appeared and went stronger with every passing second.

She spun around, grabbed Fenris arm and dragged him behind the next tree. "Stop it", she whispered.

He was tense as stone and his lips pressed together while his face slowly became darker. At the same time his eyes warned her to even dare say anything.

She raised an eyebrow, then let go of him and went back to their camp. By the time they arrived, she was grinning widely.

He stiffly went to his baggage and started preparing for the night while still glowing softly. The sounds out of the wood were increasing in the meantime and becoming even more passionately.

""So...", she eventually said. "Are you feeling well? You seem to be a bit… feverish…?" Nearly the same words he had addressed to her in the tunnel below the brothel.

He did not answer, and she smirked.

"It seems that the woodcutters take the meaning "close to nature" very literally…"

This provoked a low chuckle on his side. "Yes, it seems so."

She watched him thoughtfully. Actually it was kind of sweet that he seemed to be so embarrassed. From the way he looked like he probably had no problem at all winning women's attention, but still he seemed to be reserved when it came to this.

Apart from telling her that she was beautiful.

Their eyes met, and her breath was caught in her throat. Damn, but he really had the most beautiful eyes she had ever seen…

And again the words came out of her mouth before she could stop herself.


	10. Mages and Elves

And again the words came out of her mouth before she could stop herself.

"You are beautiful too, you know!""

He froze, as did she. She could not believe that she had actually spoken her thoughts out loud…

"I mean, from a pure biological point of view… ", she spluttered and waved with her hand. "You know… your bone structure is quite… good looking…"

*Shut up, Cassy…. Just shut up…. You are only making it worse with every single word….*

His markings were glowing more intensely, but he now also smiled, and it was no taunting, but a genuine smile. "Thank you."

"Mmm…" She started to open her small braid to be able to hide her burning face. "Welcome. But don't let it go to your head."

The couple in the woods finally reached their peak – at least the man – then it went calm.

"That was a quick one", Cassy murmured and stroked through her hair.

He chuckled and came back to the fire. "At least it was no ambush…"

"… only to our senses", she answered and grinned, while he was smirking.

"Yes, indeed."

It was silent again, but fortunately not a strange silence anymore. Fenris stared into the flames while she was loosening her second braid and then combing her hair with her fingers.

"I was wondering", he eventually said, "how you received your scar."

She knew that other people would have been offended if someone had asked them so bluntly, but she liked it that he did not beat about the bush.

"It is now nearly nine years ago, that I was about to marry a man I did not even know very well." He raised an eyebrow, and she shrugged. "It was a common practice, and my father thought it would be good for me. I hated the thought, but at this time… well, let's say, I still tried to fit in. But on this day… everything changed. There was a human noble who thought he could do whatever he wanted. He took some of us with him…. My cousin Shianni was one of them." She pressed her lips together and stared into the flames. "He… I was too late. And when I saw what he had done to her, I lost control. I killed him, but before he died, he was able to do this to me." Her hand rose to her scar while she fought tears of rage and sorrow.

"I am sure you did your best."

She laughed and said with tear-choked voice: "Yeah. But unfortunately my best wasn't good enough."

He did not say anything else, and she appreciated it. Sometimes silence was more worth than every meaningless word.

"So", he eventually said. "You think I am beautiful?"

Completely taken by surprise she looked at him. He smirked at her, a teasing look on his face.

"Yes", was all she could answer, "and not only because of the bone structure…"

"How sweet", an unknown voice interrupted them in the very same moment. "If we haven't here some BEAUTIFUL love-birds…"

Cassy closed her eyes. This could not be true. Finally the two of them were talking normally, and now THIS happened…

"What comes to your mind when you see these two, babe?" the man asked.

"That I am wondering why two knife-ears are alone in the woods", a female voice answered.

Fenris and Cassy became even more tensely when they heard the insult, but still did not turn around.

"Exactly", the stranger said. "And do you want to know what I am wondering?"

"Sure, babe", the female voice answered, and Cassy glanced at Fenris out of the corner of her eyes. He was relaxing again, but she knew the change in his demeanor: Ready to pounce…

"I think they are delivering something really valuable for their master… And I want to have it…."

All Cassy was able to do, before Fenris and she whirled around and charged, was rolling her eyes. How could someone be so stupid and talk so much instead of using their chance and ambushing them properly?

Fenris went for the man, she for the woman. The stranger was human, held to knifes in her hands and reacted quickly, although Cassy was still able to cut off some strands of her red hair.

Wait. Red hair?

Cassy spun around and charged again, trying to get a better look on the woman's face.

That was unbelievable. It really was the female part of the couple they had been involuntarily witnessed only half an hour before…

"Yield", Cassy hissed while letting her knifes speak. "I heard a good orgasm can be very tiring… Oh, wait…." She charged even more quickly. "Then I should probably only be worried about your partner…"

The woman's eyes narrowed and she hissed. "Shut up, knife-ear. He's the best lover in the world!"

The groan of a man could be heard from behind them, and due to the fact that Cassy had heard it before – although in passion – she knew that it was NOT Fenris.

"Looks like your lover boy has some problems…"

"Fuck!" the lover boy cried only some seconds later. "Babe, let's go. This fucking elf is GLOWING!"

And within seconds the two of them disappeared as quickly out of their life as they had entered it.

Cassy glanced at Fenris. He was still glowing, his face looking tense and furious, while he was holding his immense broadsword in his hands as if it would not weight anything at all. He looked really pissed, and she wondered what exactly was the reason for it.

She could not help herself and said: "Did they hurt your feelings, firefly?"

He shot her an annoyed and then, as he saw her face, amused glance. "No. I simply don't like it to be interrupted when…" He did not finish, so she helped him out.

"… when talking to a beautiful woman?"

Now he chuckled and put his sword on his back. "Exactly so. But don't let it get to your head…"

* * *

They woke up early the next morning and silently continued their travel. None of them started to discuss again if and why they should travel together, they simply did it.

Fenris was relaxed. It was a strange feeling he hardly knew, and yet it was there. Cassy was humming while walking next to him, but even that sound did not annoy him. Actually it was kind of soothing and mixed with the sound of the birds and the rustling of the leaves.

He watched her out of the corner of his eyes. She had braided her hair again, but he still saw her with open hair for his inner eye. Deep brown, mixed with red strands. A color which fit into the autumn wood surrounding them.

She had told him bluntly that she thought he was beautiful. A ridiculous thought, although he knew that he seemed to be attractive for a lot of people. Isabela had mentioned it more than one time, and there had been others too signaling him their interest. But none of them had ever caught enough of his attention to really let him consider lowering his guards. There were other ways of taking care of sexual release, and none of them included letting another person in his bed or life.

Hawke had asked him once, while being drunk and worried, if he had made bad experiences in the past, but that was not the fact. Danarius' interests had been focused on his power and magic and not his slaves, and Fenris had been valuable enough for his master to not offer him to one of his "friends". Anyway, when standing in the shadows of the events his master had arranged, he had seen a lot.

The memories made him flinch. If he only had had the will to do anything against it… But then he would be probably dead by now.

"What are you thinking about?" Cassy asked.

He hesitated and answered eventually: "Unpleasant things."

"Really?" she commented dryly. "I NEVER had guessed from the look on your face…"

He frowned and shot her a glance she returned with a wide smile. When she saw the look in his eyes, her smile faded. "Want to talk about it?"

"No!"

She shrugged. "Fair enough!" Then she jumped on a tree trunk lying next to the path they were taking and balanced on it.

He frowned. "Why are you doing this?"

"Because I can?"

He shook his head and hid a smile.

"I have seen it!" It sounded satisfied.

"What?"

"Your smile!"

He looked at her again, now amused, and suddenly she faltered.

"Damn!" she hissed and jumped back next to him on the ground. "Stop doing that!"

"Excuse me?"

"Stop looking at me with that puppy eye look!"

He bowed his head slightly to the side, frowning.

"Yes." Her hands waved into his direction. "Exactly THAT look… except of the frown…"

"I don't know what you are talking about", was all he could answer. "There are no puppy eyes…!"

A chunk of mud landed on his shoulder, and an unknown voice said: "Back off, Elven mage! Stay away from our village!"

The stranger had not even finished the sentence, when Fenris started to glow… and to growl.

* * *

He charged without letting Cassy any chance to hold him back. Within seconds he had grabbed the man by his neck – a field worker standing with three other men on an acre nearby the village they had been approaching – and lifted him in the air.

"I am NO mage!" His voice sounded furious and his markings were full inflamed when he barked the words. The man gasped and grabbed his wrists while the others were exchanging insecure looks.

Damn it, what the hell was going on here?

Cassy stepped next to Fenris and said to the stranger: "Let me guess: The two love-birds from last night are living here in the village and told a pack of lies because they did not know better …?"

"I… can't breathe…", was all she got as answer.

"Well", she repeated pitiless, "that is what you get when messing with an Elven mage…!"

The eyes of the man widened, while Fenris tensed.

"Let's go!" she said to him.

He hesitated, then let go of the man and shot him a last, angry glance. Cassy could nearly hear the four men gasping of relief when Fenris and she started to continue taking the road.

"Why did you say that?" he barked once they were out of sight of the village.

"What?" She frowned.

"Why did you tell them I am a mage….?"

She shrugged. "I don't know… it was kind of funny to see their faces…"

"Funny?" Now he sounded even angrier, and she was wondering what his problem was.

So she asked him: "What by your damn Maker is your problem?"

"My problem is that I HATE mages", he hissed and watched her out of narrowed eyes. "And it is not MY maker!"

"Fine!" She waved with her arms. "But why by Andraste's underwear do you HATE mages? You FREED mages!"

"That…. was something else…"

She raised an eyebrow. "Something else? So you freed mages – by coincidence you said – but actually you think you should not have done it…?"

The mages blight had never been anything she had thought about a lot, so her confusion came more from the fact that she did not understand his reaction at all. Neither did she understand his anger.

His markings were still glowing, and his jaw was tense. Without thinking she made a step towards him and took his hands in hers. "Fenris, calm down. Everything is fine. It was just a joke…"

"A stupid one!"

"Actually I think it was a good one", she answered and let go of his hands, now equally pissed like he seemed to be. "The only thing which is STUPID is your reaction…!"

"You know nothing about me", he hissed and continued walking. "Don't judge when you have no idea what you are talking about…"

"Oh, excuse me, your highness. I forgot that I am just a simple minded Elven girl and you the oh so educated men of world", she answered sarcastically and followed him. "So answer me one question, Prick: Why freeing mages when you HATE them? Weren't you able to…. I don't know…. just NOT do it?"

He whirled around. "Let the matter rest, Cassalia!" It sounded threatening.

Her chin was coming up. "Not if you don't give me a reason why you are acting so damn irrationally!"

His eyes became narrow. Then he answered and pronounced every single word he said: "I was a slave to a magister who carved these unbearable markings into my skin for the sole purpose of being his puppet. Is this reason enough for you to allow me to act STUPIDLY? Or IRRATIONALLY?"

Her heart skipped. A slave… She remembered all too well how it had felt to be captured by a magister on her own, in the few days – or had it been only hours? – in which the Tevinter slaver had put others and her into cages. If not for the Hero of Ferelden, she would now probably be a servant in Tevinter … or worse.

Or dead.

"I…" She wanted to tell Fenris how sorry she was. And that she knew at least a little bit how he felt. Then she saw the anger and also shame in his eyes and answered instead: "At least your markings are pretty... I mean, they make pretty patterns."

He froze and stared at her as if she had just lost her mind. Maybe she had, because only seconds later he looked as if he was willing to kill her for her insult. And then… His anger was washed away by a deep sigh and a low chuckle. "Always see the bright side of life?"

She relaxed. "Yeah. That's about the size of it…"

His eyes moved thoughtfully over her face. "Some years ago I might have killed you for such words."

"And what changed your mind? Not that I would like to complain or anything…"

He chuckled again and stroked through his white strands. "I guess my friends – mainly the Champion – helped me to understand that sarcasm and senseless ranting is not always a sign of stupidity or hostility."

Her eyebrows went up and her hands to her chest. "How charming you can be. I am flattered…"

A smirk formed in the corner of his mouth. "You are welcome."

She rolled her eyes. "Don't test your luck, firefly! Gosh, if I would not know it better, I really would think you are a woman. Such a moody behavior…"

His chuckle sounded genuine, but deep in his eyes she still saw bad memories.

There was so much to learn about this man, so many mysteries and scars that not only seemed to cover his body, but also his soul. On the other hand his mind was as bright as his tongue was sharp, and she really started looking forward to the next milestones of their journey.

"Do I want to know what you are thinking?" he asked dryly.


	11. Gut Feeling

"Do I want to know what you are thinking?" he asked dryly.

"I leave it up to your imagination", she answered with a grin. "Anyway, let's move on and leave these hillbillies behind us."

He nodded in agreement. After some minutes of walking she asked him: "Do you have a plan, mastermind?"

He grimaced. "Not exactly."

"That's what I thought…"

"Do YOU have a plan?"

She shot him a mocking glance. "Sure you want to have a suggestion from a stupid alienage girl…"

"Stop putting words into my mouth that I never said."

"But thought…"

"That is what YOU think!" he answered. "The only reason why I did not want us to travel together was because…" He hesitated.

"Yes?" Now she gave him a curious glance.

He shrugged. "I guess I was not sure if I could trust you."

"No", was all she said to his words. "I think you trusted me from the start. And THAT is the only reason why you did not want us to travel together."

"That does not make any sense."

"I think it makes a lot of sense. You are a lone wolf, even though you had worked together with the Champion in the past. But still… the way you move when arriving in a new location, the way you look at strangers… You are always on guard. And you don't trust your gut!"

He was silent for a long moment, than he answered: "My master had chased me after I had escaped. For years. There had never been a time or place where I could really feel save."

She moved a bit closer to him, captivated by his voice: Sad, angry, full of regret and also hate. Part of her wanted to touch and comfort him, but she did not give into the impulse. It would have been too much and too early, for both of them.

"I understand", was all she said. "But Hawke… I understood that he never let you down, right? He never betrayed you…?

"Yes."

"Although he is a mage."

"Yes."

"So… What was your first gut feeling about him?"

Fenris chuckled. "That he is strange, chaotic, a bit crazy… but honest. Integer. And strong."

She giggled and shut her mouth abruptly. Damn, she NEVER giggled. But the similarity to her was really significant, and he seemed to realize at the same time and grinned.

"So maybe trusting your gut isn't the worst idea, right?"

He stopped and turned, his look sizing her up. She became nervous, but did not show him. However, whatever he saw did not only make him relax, but also smirk a bit… and she was blushing again when he was turning away.

"Maybe you are right", was all he said while she was biting on her lower lip and following him.

A sound let them whirl around, their hands on their weapons. Only a few meters behind them a man had appeared and was raising his hands, his movements careful and non-threatening. For a few seconds a small flame appeared in his hand, than he closed his fingers, looked at them and steeped between the trees next to him.

Cassy and Fenris exchanged a glance.

"A mage", she stated.

"Obviously", Fenris sighed and then followed the stranger.

He was careful and tense, but if the mage had the intention to hurt them, he would have been able to do so before. So obviously he had other reasons to contact them.

Fenris shot Cassy a short glance and was pleased to see that she was careful too. He eyes scanned the environment and her hands where at her daggers.

"Be vigilant", he said nevertheless and she answered with a dangerous smile: "Always am, always will be. It is not the first time that I might have to defend myself."

"But I guess it is the first time that you might have to defend yourself against a mage?"

She shrugged. "Even a mage has a heart I can pierce, right? And apart from that he is also a man, so he has another very sensitive body part I can hit to disrupt his concentration…"

"That is no game, Cassy", he growled.

"Really?" She raised her eyebrows. "I thought he just wanted to train a bit…"

"Be serious!"

"Oh, come on, Fenris, if he had any hostile intentions, he would have…"

"Newly married?" an amused voice interrupted her, and the stranger appeared next to them between the trees.

"What?" she asked irritated, while Fenris' answered in a nearly indignant way: "NO!"

Suddenly she understood and shot him an angry glance. "Why by Andrastes underwear do you sound so horrified? There might be worse things than being married with me…"

Well, actually she had never ever thought about marrying and could not imagine herself as a wife at all, but... well, his reaction was still kind of offending.

"Cassalia", he started to say, and now it was on her to growl.

"Don't call me like that! After all we AREN'T married, right?" Her attention went to the stranger. "So, who are you and what do you want?"

The pale grey eyes of the human went from her to Fenris and back. He had light blond hair, a tanned skin and did not really look like Cassy had imagined a mage to look, as he was trained and muscular. The amusement had disappeared from his gaze and been replaced by sincerity and wakefulness.

"My name is Aidan. I guess you are lucky that I heard per coincidence the rumor that an Elven mage has passed the last village…"

Fenris' snort interrupted him. "I am NO Elven mage!"

Now Aidans look turned vigilant. "The villagers were quite sure that they saw your skin glowing!"

Impatiently Fenris shook his head. "I am NO mage. And if you are looking for someone supporting some kind of mage rebellion, I am definitely the wrong person…"

"Actually he did it before", Cassy added seemingly innocent, "but he is just so shy and does not like to have so much attention…"

"CASSY", he barked angrily and turned around to her, without letting the mage out of the corner of his eye, "what's that about?"

"Fenris", she answered as if talking to a small child. "Here is a Ferelden mage who obviously helps other mages. Otherwise he would not be here, but in the Ferelden circle, right?"

"And?" Now he was looking at the stranger again, who had crossed his arms in front of his chest and simply waited.

"And I guess he might help us finding your sister."

He was such a fool and had not even thought of Varania. Still his first reaction when it came to magic was caution… no, distrust.

His eyes went to the man's face. Had there been a flicker of recognition when his sister's name had been mentioned?

"Do you know her?" he asked and now turned back to Aidan. "Do you know where she is?"

The man stayed calm and then simply said. "I cannot trust you."

Cassy knew that Fenris would start to glow before it even happened. Aidan did not even flinch; he only raised an eyebrow and watched Fenris' markings.

"Don't look at them like this, mage", the Elven warrior hissed and tensed even more. From one second to another there was so much hatred in his voice that Cassy understood for the first time how much the things he had experienced in his past had poisoned his soul with anger and shame and hate. The few hours she had spent in a cage could not be compared with it at all.

"Fenris." Her voice was clear and calm. "Please, look at me."

He hesitated while Aidan was still waiting, than did as she asked.

She gulped when she saw the hunted look in his eyes, and this time she did not deny herself the impulse to touch him, but took his hands in hers. "He is just surprised. You are, aren't you?" Now she was looking at the mage, still holding Fenris' hands, and her eyes became narrow while sizing him up.

"Of course I am surprised", Aidan answered. "I have never seen any markings like this before. But I heard about an Elven warrior fighting at the side of the Champion of Kirkwall, having Lyrium marks…" Now his eyes went to Fenris. "Is that you?"  
His fingers tensed in Cassys hands, and she squeezed them reassuringly.

"I am", he finally answered roughly.

Aidan nodded while hope was rising in his eyes. "Is he here as well?"

"No!"

The mage tried to hide his disappointment, but Cassy had seen it.

"Now tell me, have you seen my sister?" Fenris voice still sounded hoarse, as if he did not really trust himself to hope. "Have you seen Varania?"

Aidan hesitated, than he nodded and crooked his head to the side. "Yes, I have. I helped her and a young boy to find a save place…"

"Where?"

Fenris' fingers were slipping out of her grasp, and she immediately missed the contact, cursing herself for the thought.

"I will tell you… if you do me a favor."

"What?" Fenris's eyes became small, and he made a step towards the man. "The favor will be to allow you to live, mage!"

"Fenris!" she hissed, stepped next to him and looked to the mage. "Excuse us for a moment, alright?"

Aidan simply nodded while she grabbed the arm of the furious elf and pulled him away.

"Are you nuts?"

"I won't allow him to blackmail me", Fenris growled and turned to go back to the mage, but she did not let go off his arm.

"Fenris, STOP!" Well, nearly shouting at him let him look back to her, his face furious and his green eyes blazing. "Don't be so damn stubborn. Let us hear what he has to say, alright? He is no bad guy…"

"And you know that how?"

A slow smile started to spread on her lips. Then she looked into his eyes and answered: "Gut feeling!"

The words did not really seem to convince him, but at least they washed a bit of his anger away. "I don't trust him", he said grumpily.

"Neither seems he to trust you", was all she answered and added: "I won't force you, Fenris. I have no interest in letting myself be made responsible in case this might not end well. All I can do is to offer…. well, my gut feeling." She shrugged and gave him a crooked smile.

His eyes wandered over her face, and she had no idea what he was thinking. Eventually he turned around and went back to Aidan. "Talk!"

"There is something I wanted to do for a long time", the mage explained calmly and ignored Fenris "charming" way, "but I never had the opportunity due to a lack of… let's say resources. I help apostates whenever I can, but we never stay together, to make sure that the templars have no chance to find us all in one place. Anyway, I received interesting information some months ago. After the events in Kirkwall the templars took their lyrium depot from Denerim away because they feared an ambush against the chantry. They brought it to several locations, and in case of one I know for sure where it is."

"You want us to help destroy the lyrium depots of the Fereldan templars?"

Cassy froze when she heard Fenris ask the question. His voice sounded completely emotionless, a fact that already was a sign that something was wrong. But apart from that he had slightly changed his stance as well.

She was not sure if Aidan had recognized it or simply reacted unconsciously in the right way: Calm. And honest. "Only one. I know how that must sound to you. And I understand that you have no reason to trust me. But I have to take this chance." Sorrow appeared in his eyes, and from one second to another he looked older than the mid-thirty years he seemed to be. "I have always been free. My parents have been travelling merchants and hid me well, while my grandmother – also a mage – taught me. Since the age of thirteen I have never seen a circle before. Then we were for the first time nearby Kinloch Hold, and…", he shook his head, "I was simply relieved that I had the opportunity to be free and walked away without looking back."

"Why are you telling me all this, mage?" Fenris interrupted him.

"So that you are able to make a decision", Aidan answered tensely. "After the events in Kirkwall the first mage refugees came to Fereldan. Grandmother had seen them arrive, blessed by the gift of forecasting, and send me to bring them to her. And so it all began…" Aidan pressed his lips together. "But I am no battle mage and no tactician. And I am neither so stupid nor so proud to pretend otherwise. I can help the mages to find safe places because I know the road, but the templars are getting mightier with every day. If I had the Champions skill or the spirit mage's power, than I would be able to…

"Stop it", Fenris barked, then spun around and just walked away, disappearing between the trees. "I… need to think…"

Cassy forced herself to let him go while Aidan's hands became fists.

"He is… just a bit grumpy", she eventually said and smiled halfheartedly. The way Fenris behaved at the moment was more than a bit grumpy. It was denying and distrustful and showed her clearly how few she knew about him.

Aidan nodded abruptly, than the two of them waited in silence for Fenris to come back.

Cassy was getting more nervous with every passing second. She had seen the hate in his eyes when it came to magic. Would he really support Aidan to be able to find his sister or would he decide that it was worth the risk to beat the information out of the mage?

But the biggest question was: Would he come back at all?

It took a load off her mind to see him walking back to them some minutes later, and a smile was forming on her lips… until she heard what he was saying.


	12. Change

It took a load off her mind to see him walking back to them some minutes later, and a smile was forming on her lips… until she heard what he was saying.

"I will help you. But due to the fact that this task is more than a bit dangerous, I have two terms!"

Cassy became vigilant while Aidan was raising an eyebrow and asking: "Two? Obviously it is not as important for you to find your sister as I thought…"

"Don't test your luck, mage", Fenris growled. "Do you want to hear them or not?"

Aidan hesitated only a short moment, his eyes narrowed, and then nodded with a sigh.

"Describe Varania and the boy", Fenris claimed. "I need to know if you really have seen her."

"She has red hair", Aidan answered immediately, "and your eyes. As for the boy: He is slender, with brown locks, brown eyes and a crooked nose."

Fenris shot Cassy a questioning glance, and she nodded. "Yes, that's him."

Aidans eyes went back to Fenris. "And the second term?"

"Cassalia has nothing to do with this", the Elven warrior said calmly. "She won't accompany us. And to specify: Even if she tries, we won't allow it!"

"WHAT?" Cassy whirled around to him. She could not believe what she had just heard. "No way! NO WAY! I will not let you do this alone!"

He simply ignored her and continued looking at Aidan. "These are my terms."

"No dice", she hissed and grabbed his arm. "Do you hear me? I will find a way to follow you if you even DARE letting me here. Forget it, Fenris…"

With a low growl he looked at Aidan, said "Excuse us for a moment!", and now it was HIM dragging HER between the trees and out of Aidans sight. Then he pushed her against the next tree and simply said: "No, Cassalia. Don't argue with me about this decision…!"

"The decision YOU made for me!" she hissed. She was so damn furious that she was trembling. "The decision you have NO RIGHT to make for me!" Her voice was growing loader and loader with every second. "Darn, you have been a slave! Shouldn't you know that there is nothing worse than taking away the freedom to decide something ON YOUR OWN!?"

"Cassy, don't make a mountain out of a molehill…"

She did neither think nor hesitate; she simply reacted and hit him hard against his chest. He had no idea how furious she was. Again he let her sound like a childish girl who could not take care of her own. Never ever would she allow him to do this on his own!

"Cassalia", he growled while fending her off.

Hearing her full name out of his mouth did it: She charged.

He was prepared, but not willing to really fight with her. Too bad for him! Before he even knew what was happening, his lip was split and his cheekbone bruised.

That let him finally come alive and REALLY fight her.

She did not stand a chance against him and understood for the first time that, when they had fought in her father's house, he must have contained himself. But now he seemed to have been unleashed and only seconds later she was thrown to the earth and pressed to the ground. "Stop it NOW! I won't change my mind!"

Her eyes narrowed, and she pressed against his palms on her shoulder blades. "Neither will I, PRICK!"

They stared into each other's eyes, none of them willing to back off, none of them willing to surrender. And then… something changed.

* * *

Fenris felt when it happened, as much as he saw it in Cassys face. The way she looked, the way her body pressed against his… all of it shifted slightly. The heat in her eyes did not only come from her anger anymore, but also from something else, something he felt as well in a way he had never felt before.

Mynari, his childhood friend, had told him stories about his relationships when he had been younger and whom he had been with. Afterwards he had remembered some scenes or events, also more intimate ones, but every time he had felt like a watcher and not like the person who had really shared these private moments with another person.

But now there was no way for him to avoid or ignore what was happening. Just as little as he could ignore his own reaction and his anger turn into a feeling which made his pulse become quicker and his throat dry.

"So", she whispered, her voice sounding husky. "Are we clear now? I come with you."

"No", he heard himself answering again, and yet it did not sound like before, but kind of teasing. He should not do this and stay strict, but the way she looked and the way she smelled – besides the way she FELT – made it impossible for him to think clearly.

"Fenris", now she was obviously trying to address his sanity. "Why do you want me to stay back? You know that I am able to fight. And I am also able to pick a lock, in case you don't know yet. And last but not least I am able to handle stubborn, glowing Elven warriors…"

He inhaled deeply, which was not the best idea because now her clean flavor felt his senses… "Cassy, believe me, it is better this way. Fighting templars is completely different from fleeing templars…"

She shrugged and looked into his eyes. "I know that. But I don't care. Besides, you know that you cannot forbid me anything, do you? I am free, as are you…" Slowly she straightened up, and this time he allowed it… which brought their faces close. He could feel her breath hitch and saw her dip her lids, hiding her eyes… and waiting.

For him. To take a decision. To make the next step.

It took him too long to clear his confused thoughts. Suddenly she pressed her lips together, and color flooded her cheeks which did not come from anger or passion, but shame.

"Forget it", she hissed. "I…"

He silenced her by pressing his lips to hers, forcefully, insecurely, hungrily. This was crazy… They did not know each other longer than TWO days! But…

The thought got lost when she opened her mouth to his kiss and pulled him closer, letting herself fall back into the leaves. Instinct kicked in and told him what to do, how to angle her head to be better able to explore her mouth, how to nip and lick and kiss in a way which was neither shy, nor insecure. Her arms came around his neck, and her fingers were stroking through his hair while she was moaning softly into the kiss.

When they both had to draw breath, her eyes were glittering and her breath going quickly. "I…" She licked her lips. "I am sorry that I hurt you. "

He cleared his throat and shrugged. "It's nothing."

"Nothing?" She skeptically raised an eyebrow. "You will have a bruise on your cheek tomorrow. And I tasted the blood on your lips…"

The words let them both blush simultaneously, and he stood up quickly and offered her his hand. She looked into his eyes, and he could nearly hear her think about how to behave.

That was the moment when they heard Aidan hiss and ran hastily towards them.

* * *

Cassy grabbed Fenris' hand and allowed him to pull her up to face Aidan.

"What is it?" Fenris asked warily.

"I planned to meet with another mage", Aidan said. "But he has problems."

Cassy frowned. "How do you know?"

The mage hesitated and did not meet their eyes. "That's… difficult to explain…"

"Well, then you better start", Fenris ordered warningly.

Aidan sighed and looked up. When Cassy and Fenris followed his gaze, they saw a crow landing on a branch above them and starting to polish its feathers.

"Grand-Ma", was all Aidan said and nodded at the bird.

It took Cassy a moment to understand, while Fenris immediately went rigid and hissed: "Witch!"

The crow shot him a mocking glance, while Aidan said: "She had a foreseeing, showing her that Derrik seems to be in danger. He is nearby, but for unknown reasons he cannot come."

"What exactly has she… it… well, your Grand-Ma seen?" Cassy asked and watched the bird suspiciously. The thought that it was an old woman was… strange.

"Her visions are not always clear. But she senses danger."

"So now you not only want us to help you destroy a lyrium depot, but also one of your apostate friends?" Fenris growled.

Aidan shot him an angry glance. "He is the only of my APOSTATE friends who can help us with our plan. He fought in Ostagar against the Darkspawn and survived!"

"Probably because he fled", Fenris answered unimpressed. "I heard nobody survived the massacre!"

Now Aidans eyes became narrow, and he made a step towards the Elven warrior. Although topping Fenris by half a head, he did not seem to intimidate him. "He survived by lying badly injured under the corpses of his friends while the darkspawn were FEASTING on them!"

Well, that finally let Fenris calm down and Cassy gulp. Involuntarily she started to tremble. The Darkspawn…. She always tried not to think of the day when they had come to Denerim and into the Alienage. She had seen with her own eyes what these creatures were able to do, without hesitation and mercy. Shianni and she had only survived – again – because of the Hero of Ferelden.

"Cassy?" Fenris' voice sounded concerned and his fingers touched gently her elbow.

"I am fine", she managed to say. "Let us help him, Fenris. Together."

Their eyes locked when she finished the sentence, and the memory of the kiss they'd just shared came back immediately. Never before had she been kissed like that, and never before had she felt so alive. He had come over her like a starving wolf and she had enjoyed every second of it, meeting his kiss with the same hunger. Still she could taste his blood on her tongue, and all she knew was that she wanted more of this.

More of him.

So if he dared to send her away again, she would cut his balls…

Well, probably not. But at least she would make him a scene he would never forget.

A small smirk appeared in the corner of his mouth as if he was able to read her thoughts. Thereupon she rose challenging an eyebrow and finally he sighed and said: "Alright, let's go and look for your friend!"

Aidan nodded in relieve and started to follow the crow who lifted off her branch and flew into a north—western direction. They had to run to be able to follow her, and soon Cassy concentrated on her breathing to be not completely out of breath once they arrived where they were going.

It took them twenty minutes to get there. The old lady-crow-witch-whatever thing did not allow them to slow down, but increased her speed instead.

"Do you know what your friend is doing here?" Cassy shouted while climbing down a hill which led them out of the wood into the direction of some fields.

"Actually I was looking for him when I found you", Aidan answered, sounding breathlessly. At least Cassy was not the only one. Fenris still seemed as if he had not run more than some meters. "He told me that he had heard rumors that another of his mage companions survived the battle. His family had originally come from this village", he pointed at a small farmer village in the distance, "and obviously Derrik really went here to look for him. But something is wrong…. Very wrong…"

"Oh, I like the sound of that", Fenris answered dryly. "Another mage, another apostate. This is getting better with every second…"

She grinned at him. "Well, you really should be thankful for meeting me than. At least I have no magic…"

"Which does not mean you are no trouble..."

He shot her a short glance while they were running through a cornfield. Her grin deepened. "I take that as a compliment."

He smirked, but when they left the cornfield his face became wary.

The village was small, not consisting of more than a dozen of houses. And it was quiet…. too quiet!

Aidan had slowed done and looked at the crow which had landed on a hay bale. The witch's eyes lay on a flat, long building nearby. Then she started to change in a whirl of light, and Cassy looked to the side while Fenris tensed and his hand went to his weapon.

"What is it, Granny?" Cassy heard Aidan ask and peeped to the old lady… to look away again. As she had expected: Naked.

And very old.

"Death and blood rule this place", the old woman said. Then: "Don't be shy, kid. Never seen an old lady before?"

Well, that seemed to be addressed to her. Cassy gulped and then looked at the other woman. "At least no old woman who has been a crow only seconds before."

Aidan's grand-mother, having the same pale grey eyes like he had, chuckled and allowed her grandson to lay his shirt around her shoulders. Then she looked at Fenris who was watching her carefully. "You don't need to be afraid of me, warrior", she said calmly.

"I do not fear you, witch", was all she got as answer. "But tell us what is happening here!"

"I am afraid", she said calmly and was looking again at the flat building, "you will get your answer soon enough…"


	13. A matter of practice

"I am afraid", Aidan's Granny said calmly and was looking again at the flat building, "you will get your answer soon enough…"

Cassy shot a glance to Fenris. She did not like the sound of that, and from his look neither seemed he. Anyway, they had both decided to help Aidan – well, actually SHE had decided it and he had got roped into her decision – so they would not back off now.

"Be vigilant", Fenris sad to the mage when he approached the building. "And prepare yourself for the possibility that your friend might not be the person anymore that he had been…"

Aidan looked at him over his shoulder, confused and angrily. "What do you mean?"

"From experience it is never a good sign to enter an empty village where a mage is missing. I would not be surprised if he is practicing blood magic inside of this building, maybe together with his friend…?"

Now Aidan stopped and turned completely. "And for WHAT?"

Fenris shrugged, not impressed by Aidan's angry face at all. "Power? Curiosity? The ability to simply do it? Who knows why mages act like they do…?"

"I DO", Aidan hissed. "If you might have overseen, I AM a mage. And I would never ever use blood magic…"

"… because I taught you not to do so", his Grand-Mother interrupted him. "But that does not mean that it is not used by your friend... "

Now Aidan got really furious. Cassy had the feeling that this was a rare event, so she just leaned back and watched. This wasn't the best time and place, but she had the feeling that what was going to happen would be important, if only to clear the air. "Are you just stabbing me in the back…?" Aidan hissed and looked down at his Grand-Mother.

"Don't be foolish, boy", his Granny simply answered, "all I say is that there might be the option that our warrior here is right." Turning to Fenris who looked slightly surprised and also a bit pleased, she added: "And don't think that I condemn the use of blood magic, warrior. Actually I did it myself when I was young…"

"What?" Aidan again.

"… but I decided after one… accident that it is too dangerous for me. And my little Aidan was so soft hearted and lively when he was younger", she smiled tenderly at old Aidan who was now blushing slightly out of embarrassment; "I did not want him to get into touch with it."

"So you confess that blood magic is dangerous?" Fenris stated.

She nodded. "Of course I do. It is as dangerous as all other magic as well. As dangerous as wearing a sword or a crossbow or daggers. Not magic or weapons are what we must fear, but bad persons using them. And there will always be those misusing their powers, and always others fighting against them."

Fenris had tensed and pressed his lips together. "I have heard that before, so many times. But mages are much more at risk to be corrupted by the power of magic than a warrior by a sword…"

"True, but they are also much more vigilant." The old woman's eyes went to Cassy. "Your partner is a challenging and distrustful one. But I have no doubt you are able to handle him well." Turning back to Aidan she added: "Than let's go."

While her grand-son was starting to argue with her about her usage of blood magic and the fact that she wanted to come with them, Cassy was turning to Fenris and grinning. "So: Do you also think I can handle you?"

He had watched the two mages grumpily and now looked at her: "No one HANDLES me."

She pursed her lips and made a small step towards him. He seemed distressed, and she did not like the look of him like that. Probably he would need soon enough all of his concentration and should not worry about magic or blood magic or anything else.

Distraction seemed to be a good idea. "You are right, probably MANHANDLING would be better…"

His eyebrows rose, and a small smirk appeared in the corner of his mouth. "Are you trying to make me smile, Cassalia?"

"Does it work?"

"Maybe… but still;" his face turned warily again, "be vigilant. There was a time when I blindly accused every mage of being bad, but I have learned that his is not the case. Unfortunately I have ALSO learned that mages who are NOT misusing their power are the exception."

His face was serious, and she nodded slightly. "Don't worry, firefly, I have no intention in leaving this world so soon. It has just starting becoming interesting… "

Their eyes met, and she blushed slightly. "I mean… this whole thing here. Meeting new people…"

His smirk deepened.

"Seeing crows turn into old witches…" Damn, his lips were simply so beautiful. They had a reason for being here, right? But she could not think clearly anymore…

And then the next words slipped again out of her mouth before she was able to stop herself…

"I want you to kiss me again!"

Well, she did it again: Speaking without thinking. His eyes widened, but he had no chance to answer as Aidan was opening the door to the building in the very same moment. Obviously his Grand-Mother had finally agreed to stay back, because she was just turning into a crow and flying away.

Silence was coming out of the building, and the complete absence of sounds gave Cassy the chill. Until this moment she had not realized that part of her had expected finding the habitants of the village inside of the house, doing something completely ordinary and harmless.

What they found was something completely else.

The building was empty, apart from a crater which reached into the deep. It nearly filled the whole arrival hall, and Aidan had to stop abruptly in the entrance not to fall. "What the…", he started to say, but stopped and pointed at something to his right. "There seem to be stone steps, leading into the deep…"

"This crater looks natural", Fenris said and stepped next to the mage, following his gaze. "Why should there be a stair?"

"Shouldn't the question be: Why by Andraste's underwear is there a crater directly in a building?" Cassy interrupted both and stepped between them, looking below.

For a long moment all of them were silent, lost in their own thoughts. It was obvious that whatever was down there – IF somebody or something was down there – would not be happy to see them. On the stone steps old blood could be seen, and the whole place smelled exactly like Aidan's Grand-Mother had predicted: Like death and blood.

"Alright", she finally managed to say. "Now everyone from us is saying what he or she is thinking, and then we decide what to do. Aidan, you start."

He gulped and eventually straightened his shoulders. "I think that Derrik is down there. I don't know what happened here, but I know that he might be in danger. Anyway…", his gaze went to Fenris, "I see that this task just… expanded. Help me finding Derrik, and I will let you know where your sister is. Derrik and I will afterwards try to take care of the lyrium hideout on our own."

Fenris slowly raised one eyebrow. "I don't like your way of switching from one agreement to another, mage." He was looking at the crater, frowning, while Aidan was clever enough to stay silent. "Alright, we go down. But only with equipment. Let's look into the other buildings for torches and ropes and stay here over night. Who knows…. Maybe the habitants are just out for a walk in the wood and will come back soon…"

Cassy chuckled darkly. "I don't think so. By the way: Is anybody interested in hearing what I think?"

Both men looked down on her, irritated. She was rolling her eyes. "What? Have you thought the "Let's tell what we think!" was only addressed to the two of you?"

Her words let Aidan smile and Fenris frown a little less. "So, what do you have to say, Cassalia?" the elf eventually said.

She shrugged. "I have no idea what is below there, probably something very ugly and disturbing. But I am quite sure that whoever had lived here surely has not decided that it would be a good idea to start living in the deep. So if there is still somebody in need for help, we have to do everything to offer it, don't you think?"

Both men were watching her thoughtfully.

"Even if it endangers your safety?" Fenris eventually asked.

"I can sleep when I am dead."

He did not smirk or roll his eyes, but stepped closer instead. "This is no game, Cassy", he calmly said. "Do you know what we might face when going down…?"

She froze. Of course she knew…. But was she really willing to face her biggest nightmare again? On the other hand: A crater in the earth did not automatically lead into the Deep Roads. He just tried to find a way to make her stay because of his stupid protective instincts….

"I know what I am doing", was all she answered, than turned and went into the direction of the nearest buildings. "Alright, let's look for some useful stuff and find a place to sleep. And don't worry", she shot both a glance over her shoulder and grinned, "in case you cannot sleep tonight, I will protect you."

Two hours later they had looked into all of the buildings and found torches, ropes and even supplies which were still enjoyable. They had packed everything together and decided to stay in the biggest house where probably the village's mayor had lived.

In none of the buildings had been signs of a battle, and when they split to go to bed – there were various sleeping rooms in the house – all of them were anxious. This was getting more mysterious with every passing second.

Half an hour later Cassy was still lying on her bed and staring at the ceiling, wondering who had lived here and what had happened to her. The room was definitely that of a young woman. Curtains with a filigree flower pattern were hiding the moonlight, and the wardrobe contained various pretty dresses. It seemed that this small village had been relatively wealthy, and the people living in this house did not seem to have lived the life of farmers like the other habitants.

But why the damn hadn't they fought? Had they been captured by night? Had the darkspawn come and taken the women with them, like they had done with some of the Elven woman in the alienage, before the Hero of Ferelden had arrived…?

Cassy did not want to remember that night, so she stood up and left her room, going to the washroom at the end of the floor. There had been a tub, and although she knew that it was too late to heat enough water to take a bath, she could at least clean properly with cold water instead of having another catlick in her room.

She tensed when the door to the washroom suddenly opened, but immediately relaxed when she recognized Fenris. He was wearing only his dark trousers and an armless dark shirt, his hair damp.

Her ease turned into something else when they looked each other into the eyes, both standing in the floor, neither speaking nor moving. Then Fenris cleared his throat and stepped to the side, holding the door to the bathroom open for her. "It is all yours!"

"Thanks. "

He simply nodded and she was walking towards him, feeling his gaze lying on her and her heart hammering. This was so damn silly: She should not behave like a girl, but she could not do anything against it. Still she could not read what he was thinking or if he felt the same attraction to her she felt for him, because he was always – apart from the kiss they had shared – so reserved. And she did not want to read too much into this event, because… well, even after she had told him so stupidly that she wanted him to kiss her again, he had not made any move to do so.

Of course it wasn't the right time and place.

But right now, no one was here, and none of them knew what would be happening tomorrow… Oh, she was so confused…

"Are you alright?" he gently asked when she passed him.

"Sure", she managed to say. "I am just tired."

He nodded, but she had the feeling that he wanted to say something else. To avoid appearing even more stupid, she looked at him and asked: "Are YOU alright?"

His eyes were bright and clear, but also thoughtful. "Yes. I am. But I am also worried."

"Me too", she answered.

He raised an eyebrow. "Why haven't you said before?"

"I… don't know", she finally said sheepishly. "I guess I am just not used to sharing my thoughts and feelings with someone else…"

It was silent for a long moment, than he chuckled and shook his head, as if laughing about himself.

"What is it?" she wanted to know, confused, curious and also a bit offended.

"If someone had told me years ago that I would be the first one speaking about feelings, I would not have believed it", he answered honestly. "At least not without a bottle of wine or enough anger", he added dryly.

That brought a tentative smile upon her face. "It seems that you are ahead of me then. I am not good at all in talking about…. You know…"

"Feelings?" he helped her and smirked.

"Yes. I only trusted father and Shianni… and Soris… enough to talk about… well, things going through my mind. Which wasn't often the case", she added thoughtfully.

Now he laughed a bit, and she looked at him in bafflement. This sound… it was even more gorgeous than his smirk. Or his lips. Well, maybe not his lips, but at least his smirk.

Shit! Actually everything about him was gorgeous, and she hated the thought that she was acting so damn girlish around him.

"Alright, thanks for giving the bath free", she quickly said and added: "I thought you never would come out of it. But I guess it takes some time to take care of your prick-lick appearance…"

He raised an eyebrow, then was handing her something he had been holding together with a towel in his hand and answered: "It is just a matter of practice. But I am willing to share: A comb is a good tool to start with." His eyes ran over her hair which was – like always – a mess. There was a reason why she was braiding it, but she had opened it to go to bed.

"Are you saying I look scruffy?" she said accusingly and pointed at him in a mixture of amusement and outrage.

"All I say is that I am quite sure that a comb is from better use than your fingers", he answered dryly, than gave her a short bow and went into the direction of his room. Her eyes followed him and went narrow when he added: "In case you need help, just let me know."


	14. Instinct

"In case you need help, just let me know."

Fenris felt her look and heard her snort when he entered his room and closed the door behind him, fighting a smile. Actually he had to fight himself from smiling a lot since he had met her and was not sure what to make out of this behavior.

Apart from the fact that she was the first woman in years he had wanted to kiss.

The first woman in years he HAD kissed.

Shaking his head he laid the towel over the chair next to his bed and prepared everything for the night: His broadsword in arms reach, two daggers under his pillow and his armor pieces directly next to the bed. He remembered that at the beginning of his escape he had not even dared sleeping without armor, but that had changed in Kirkwall. A lot had changed in Kirkwall, mainly – only – by meeting Hawke, becoming his companion, starting to trust him, earning his friendship. Once he had said this to Hawke – after they had emptied his last bottle of Aggrevio Pavalis – but Devon had only raised an eyebrow and answered: "Isn't it more the fact that I have earned YOUR friendship?"

And he had been right. The man Fenris was now, he was mainly because of Hawke. He knew that. And the truth was: There were worse things.

A load knock on his door dragged him out of his thoughts.

He stayed silent, as he always did when someone came unannounced to him, waiting for the reaction of the visitor.

"Fenris!" Cassy, and she was angry. "Don't tell me you are already asleep!"

Well, even if he had been, now he would be surely awake again.

"I don't want to burst into your evening beauty session, but…"

He opened the door, and she stopped talking, but handed him his broken comb instead. "I am sorry, it is broken!"

He raised an eyebrow and took it. "Obviously", he eventually answered and looked at her again. "How so? I don't think that your hair did this…?"

She made a face and blew a strand of her hair out of her face. It was still very… messy. "My hair has nothing to do with it. But the wall in the washroom…" Now she looked slightly embarrassed and started to move from one foot to another. "Look, I simply did not want to lie, alright? I tried to use it, it got stuck in my hair, I got angry… and threw it against the wall. That's it." Stubbornly she crossed her arms in front of her chest and obviously waited for him to reprimand her.

He was tempted to do so, if only to see the little frown appear between her brows again. This whole situation was absolutely ridiculous, and again he had to hide a smile. Not an annoyed or a sarcastic one, but a genuine smile.

"Don't smirk", she told him and then pointed accusingly into his direction. "This is all your fault."

"My fault? I wasn't aware that I should have told you beforehand how to use a comb properly…"

Her eyes became narrow. "Don't make fun of me, or…!" She stopped herself before ending the sentence.

"Or what?" he calmly asked and approached her. Slowly.

She bit her lip and followed his movements, the look into her eyes changing into what he had seen before he had kissed her. "Or I might not get so quickly a replacement for you." Her back bumped against the wall opposite of his door. "And I assume your hair care is very important for your… prick."

He could hear how her voice had become a bit irregular, and he liked then sound and the thought that he might be the reason for it. "Don't worry", he heard himself answering, "as long as you are looking for a replacement, you can simply comb it with your fingers."

Her breath got caught in her throat when he pressed his flat palms to both sides of her head against the wall. All the while he was wondering where this sudden change in his behavior came from. Here and with her he was acting like the man Mynari had described, but who had always appeared like a stranger to him. Now he seemed to come back: A man confident in his body and his soul.

He tensed as he saw her raising her hand, first hesitantly, then with a challenging look in her eyes when she approached his hair. For a long moment they looked each other in the eye, than he slightly bowed his head and allowed her to touch it.

It was a dangerous composure. His neck was vulnerable like this, and in the past he would have never allowed anyone to touch him like this…

A shudder ran down his spine when he felt her fingers move through his hair, stroking and sliding, combing it. Involuntarily he moved closer, felt her breath on his cheek and knew that he only had to move his face to the side to be able to kiss her again.

"So soft", she murmured. "I guess I have to ask you for your secret, Prick…"

"I told you" he answered huskily and moved his lips to her ear. "I don't like to be called like that."

Her breathing became quicker, as did her heartbeat. Now she was moving closer, and her breasts grazed his chest.

It was pure instinct that brought him to turn his head and press his lips against her neck, feeling Cassy shudder against him and moaning his name…

"Fenris…"

* * *

Her voice, saying his name, sounded husky and strange, but what should she do with his lips on her neck? It was as if she had completely lost control over her body and her thoughts. Never before had she been so aroused in such a short time, and it was kind of embarrassing and exhilarating at the same time.

She had not come to him for this…

Well, that was a lie. Part of her had hoped that she would see more of the starving wolf who had kissed her in the wood. What she had not expected was that she would meet a playful tomcat instead.

His mouth moved to her ear and wandered over her earlap. Oh, she loved it when she was touched there, especially with lips… A small noise escaped her lips, and she decided that she should take over control before she completely turned into a brainless doll in his arms.

So she turned her head and brought her lips to his.

He tensed, and she could see that he was watching her mouth out of half closed eyes.

"Do I get my kiss now?" she managed to whisper, and a small, intimate smile appeared on his lips.

Slowly his mouth wandered over hers, and with a sigh she closed her eyes. He carefully nipped at her upper lip, then her lower one, teasing, so damn hot. Her pulse was hammering so quickly that she could nearly hear it, and her blood seemed to burn. And he hadn't even kissed her properly…

When he finally did it, she wrapped her arms around his neck and opened her mouth to welcome him. It was different from the last time, less hungry, much more sensual. His tongue tangled with hers and pulled playfully back so that she had to follow him and opened her eyes again. He still was watching her, and this time it was her who initiated the next kiss, shoving him against the wall on the other side of the floor and pressing herself against his hard, muscular body.

A low growl erupted from his throat and vibrated through her body, making her even hotter than she already was. He was big for an elf, so she went on tiptoes to reach him better, and he grabbed her hips to support her and hold her in place while they feverishly kissed each other, not playful anymore, but deeply and passionately and without restraints.

His hands were moving from her hips to her waist and then over her back until he reached her hair and buried his fingers into it. Before he was able to bend her neck and kiss her there again, she playfully escaped his grip and lowered her lips to his markings instead, caressing them with her tongue.

They had already been glowing before, but under her intimate caress they inflamed, and heat flickered over her mouth.

Astonished she pulled back and watched the markings fascinated.

"I… I am sorry…", he suddenly said and moved to the side, creating space between their bodies.

"There is no need…", she started to say, when he added: "I shouldn't have done this. It was my fault!"

She froze and turned to look into his eyes. "What exactly was your fault?" she eventually asked, her voice no longer husky, but frozen.

"This", he answered and made a vague movement with his hand.

"THIS?" she hissed and imitated his movement. How could he call what had just happened between them THIS?

"Cassalia…"

"Oh, don't start with this again. You…" Oh, she had simply no words for this behavior! He did not even look like he was effected at all, but was simply watching her with his damn, beautiful eyes as if she was behaving like a stupid child… again.

"You don't understand…", he started to add, but she did not allow him to finish the sentence, but stormed off without another word, rushing into her room and slamming the door with so much force that it must have been heard in the whole house.

Then she went to bed… and could neither find sleep, nor stop thinking about him.

Normally Cassy was a morning person and lost her good temper during the day – at least this had been the case in the alienage when watching dumbheads like Sinus – but on the next morning she barely was able to get up. Of course she knew whom to blame: HIM! Because of the damn prick she had not slept a wink and fallen asleep only two hours before dusk.

When she went downstairs and into the kitchen, Aidan was sitting at the table and looking up to her. Through the window she could see movements outside and did not have to take a closer look to know that it was Fenris who was training. Ignoring the mage's look, she caught something to eat and sat down cross-legged on the ground.

Aidan raised an eyebrow. "No morning person?"

She simply snorted and started to eat. During all the time she felt his gaze lying on her and eventually looked up to him again. He had a small smile on his lips, and she shot him a warning glance. When he started to talk, he was wise enough not to say anything else about the topic or to ask for the reasons of her bad mood. Instead he explained: "There is something Fenris and you should know before we are heading down. I want to be fair…"

She watched him warily when she heard the hesitation and concern in his voice. In the same moment Fenris voice said: "I already had the feeling that you are hiding something, mage…"

"And I have the feeling that you think that of ALL mages", slipped the words from her lips before she was able to stop herself. In sounded accusingly, and she knew that she was behaving childish. So she simply ignored him and said to Aidan: "Tell us."

He nodded and shot a short glance to Fenris who crossed his arms in front of his chest, clearly expecting the worst.

"Before he had left, Derrik had talked with me about his friend, the mage he is looking for in this village. Both had been grown up together in the circle and promoted to fight at Ostagar because of their battle mage abilities, even though they still had been quite young. But from what I gathered, this other mage had always been…", again he looked at Fenris, then sighed and ended: "Let's say he had been … ambitious and ruthless."

The Elven warrior chuckled darkly, while Cassy was watching Aidan thoughtfully. "There is more, isn't it?"

The mage nodded. "When Derrik told me that he had heard rumors that his friend had survived as well, he seemed… concerned. I asked him why, and he told me that the two of them had been at the same place when the Darkspawn had overrun them. And he had seen his friend's wounds before he had been buried under the bodies and what the Darkspawn had done to him…"

Cassy tried to avoid shuddering, but it did not work completely. Out of the corner of her eyes she saw Fenris watching her and starting to move… to do what? He did not really think that she would allow him coming close again after how he had behaved last evening?

Obviously he had had other intentions or read her body language – who was screaming loud and clearly to stay AWAY FROM HER – because he did not come, but said instead: "Let me guess: Your mage friend thinks about HIS mage friend, that he has either used blood magic to save his life or made a pact with a demon. And that HE might be the reason why this whole village is empty and there is a hole in the ground leading into the Deep Roads."

Aidan had become pale, but nodded eventually.

"But if that was the case", Cassy asked, "why the Deep Roads? Shouldn't he hate them in case the Darkspawn had nearly killed or tortured him?"

"Sometimes what you hate most is what you cannot let go", Fenris answered, his voice calm and dark, his thoughts far away. She wondered what he was thinking about and had to fight the impulse to go to him.

"I just wanted you to know that", Aidan added. "In case…"

He did not finish the sentence, and Fenris raised an eyebrow and said sarcastically: "In case for what? In case we – I – would rather stay here?" He shook his head, clearly frustrated. "We have a pact as well, mage. I help you to find your friend – and if necessary to kill this other mage – and then you tell me where my sister is."

Aidan had watched him and relieve appeared on his face. Cassy did not blame him: The thought of going down there alone – and she was sure that he would have done it – was frightening.

When she felt his gaze on her, interrogative and patient, she understood that he was waiting for her decision as well.

"Of course I will come with you", she said. "Or do you think I will let you go alone in the darkness, only accompanied by the firefly? No way. Besides", now she was smiling at him and he returned it amused, "I still like your idea of taking care of this lyrium depot. The last templars I met have not been very nice, so I think I will help you with this as well!"

He was clearly taken aback, while Fenris was clearly NOT amused. She did neither care for the one, nor the other reaction, but simply grabbed her baggage and opened the door to leave the house.

"Alright, than let's go and get this over with!"


	15. Lost

"Alright, than let's go and get this over with!"

Cassy was walking in front of him and behind Aidan who was leading them into the deep, a burning torch in his hands. It was more than clear that she was angry: He could see it in her rigid spine and the way she avoided looking at him.

Well, she had every right to be. The way he had behaved the evening before had been more than a bit inappropriate, starting from approaching her in such a manner until burning her with his lyrium.

It had been a shock for him to see that even in such an intimate moment he still harmed and hurt. A weapon: That was what Danarius had created.

Aidan stopped in front of them, and Fenris hand went directly to the Blade of Mercy. "What is it?"

The mage had crooked his head slightly and looked at the stone next to him, then shot Cassy and him a glance. "I think this crater was created by magic. I have heard about it, although I have never seen anything like it on my own. But I can feel it."

Fenris did not comment on this speculation, and neither did Cassy. But if Aidan was right with his assumption, the possibility that Derriks' friend had done this was becoming more likely with every second.

Fenris gaze went back to Cassy. He should have found a way to keep her from coming with Aidan and him. Neither of them could say what would be waiting for them in the dark, and even so he knew that she was a skilled fighter, he was also… concerned.

It was strange: He had never felt like this back in Kirkwall, not about anybody. What that meant he could not say. Either his friends had not meant as much to him as he had thought, or… she meant more to him than he wanted to admit to himself.

He pushed the thought away, not willing to consider why he was acting so strangely when it came to her. No matter what might be the reason: Yesterdays event had clearly proven that he was not able to offer something else than his company as a warrior and – maybe – a friend.

It took them nearly half an hour to reach the ground of the stairs, and by the time they had arrived, their surrounding had changed. The stone was nerved by red shining strings which reminded him of the red lyrium out of the Deep Roads. The air smelled foully, and he could see that Cassy knuckles had become paler with every passing second.

He knew he simply should stay silent, but was not able to do so. "Maybe you should go back to the surface", he calmly told her. "Aidan and I will be able to handle this on our own…"

She froze and shot him a stubborn glance. "I am fine, just not used of crawling in the Deep Roads."

He tried to find appropriate words to convince her to LISTEN to him. "Cassal… Cassy. I know you want to help us, but…" He stopped himself when he saw appear the already familiar wrinkle between her brows and knew that whatever argument he might bring, she would not hear it.

For a few seconds they watched each other silently, than Aidans voice let them look at the mage. "Blood", he said strained. "And it is fresh!"

Cassalia went to the mage and crouched next to him, watching the trace he had found. When Fenris approached the two as well, he could smell the metallic fragrance of blood.

"A fight", he said and nodded into the direction of the next wall where a small crater could be seen, next to an area where the stone had changed to black.

"A stone fist", Aidan murmured, now sounding clearly concerned. "And fire magic…"

Fenris knew these spells: He had seen Hawke casting them many times, and they had proved to be very valuable. Even he had needed to admit this.

"Well, whoever was fighting here has been injured badly", Cassy added and stood up again. "And from the trace it looks as if someone else has dragged him away. The only question is: Was it the enemy or a friend, trying to help him…?"

Aidans look became determined. "Then we should hurry to find out, don't you think?"

She shot him a smile. "Lead on!"

* * *

They started to follow the trace which was leading them deeper into the Deep Roads. With every passing minute the tunnel they were following seemed to become more narrow and the air worse. Sometimes she had the feeling that it was hard to breathe, but she knew that it was only her imagination playing with her.

Apart from the narrowness, the light also did not really help to let her feel more comfortable. The strange red markings in the stone reflected the light from Aidan's torch and seemed to cover their skin with a spooky shimmer.

Cassy could feel her hands become wet, and her heart was hammering so hard in her chest that she had the feeling everybody could hear it.

With a deep breath she tried to calm herself. In no way she would show Fenris that he had been right and she was afraid of this place, not only because of the Darkspawn, but also because of the fact that the sky was so damn far away…

"I was in the Deep Roads before", Fenris suddenly said behind her, his voice steady and calm. "Hawke had participated in an expedition into the Deep Roads and asked me to accompany him."

His words had caught her attention, despite her decision to ignore him as best as possible. "Haven't you been afraid going there?" As soon as the silly question had left her mouth, she bit on her lower lip and cursed herself for posting it. Of course he had not been afraid. Fenris did not seem to be afraid about anything…

"I was not really aware what would expect me there", he answered; "so no, at the beginning I wasn't afraid. Darkspawn were, at least in my mind, just another enemy to fight. And they are", he added, as if to confirm to her that it wasn't so bad.

It was this moment that she realized he only had talked to calm her down. Her first reaction was to tell him that he could keep his advices to himself, but then she hesitated. With this reaction he showed that he – somehow - seemed to care for her, and he had additionally offered another piece of his past.

"They are monstrous", she heard herself answering. "Fighting without mercy, without fear."

"I know", he answered gently. "A dangerous enemy. But if there is nothing you fear to lose, you do not fight like a person who does…"

That was true indeed. She remembered all too well how fiercely and determined she had fought in this horrible night in Denerim. She would have done EVERYTHING to save her own life and that of her friends.

Well, not everything. Before allowing the Darkspawn to drag her into the ground, like she had seen in case of some other women, she would have killed herself … and also Shianni…

She had not even finished this thought, when darkness, tainted and thick, rose around the three of them, and suddenly they were surrounded by Darkspawn.

Cassy froze completely, looking into one of their deformed faces and feeling the ugliness of their presence wash over her.

"Cassy!" Fenris voice seemed to come from far away, rarely reaching her mind. "Charge!"

She finally reacted, trying to draw her daggers, but it was too late. The Darkspawn seemed to grin at her, then grabbed her… and dragged her into the ground.

"Cassy, no!"

Everything seemed to take place in slow motion, while she was being dragged in the ground, the grip of the Darkspawn nearly unbearable. She could see how Fenris' lyrium activated and allowed him to move forward with supernatural speed, hammering the Darkspawn in front of him to the ground to be able to reach her in time. His face was filled with panic…

… and then gone, while stones and darkness was surrounding her, taking away the air to breathe, leaving her helplessly and motionlessly and alone…

Seconds later she snapped for air and fell to the ground, or maybe was materializing somewhere else. Without hesitating the Darkspawn grabbed her again and pulled her with him. Finally she started to fight, screaming and kicking, but he – it – did not even flinch.

After some long seconds – or minutes – she gave up and stumbled forwards next to the creature. Even her panic was gone, and all she felt was a strange numbness. Everything seemed unreal, as if in a nightmare which would and should end anytime soon.

Get a grip on yourself, Cassy, she tried to tell herself, but failed miserably.

She did not know how long the creature dragged her through the darkness, but eventually the tunnel opened into a large cave. The red markings in the walls were here present as well, gleaming and glowing. A sea located in the middle of the cavern reflected the light, and next to it…

She blinked several times to process what she was seeing. There was a cage next to the sea, and the pale faces of young and old people were turning to her, full of despair and horror. A fireplace was there as well, and next to it sat a man, looking up to her when the Darkspawn who had captured her approached.

Well, at least he was a man at first sight. At second sight he looked… strange: His skin pale and marked by dark stains, his eyes glimmering as from within. Only bunches of dark hair had remained on his head, and when he opened his mouth to speak, she saw that he had lost teeth as well.

"Ah, my friend", he welcomed them and received a snorting sound from the Darkspawn as reply. "Another one… where is she from…?"

Of course he did not get any answer from the creature, because it could NOT SPEAK!

"Who the hell are you?" she hissed and started to fight again against the grip of the Darkspawn. As strange as it sounded, seeing other humans – even a monstrous one like him – reawakened her fighting spirit.

His frightening eyes ran over her. "Oh, this one is strong", he murmured and got up. "Not like the other's…" Following the words, he shot a glance into the direction of the cage, and one woman started to whimper when she saw it, pressing her face against the shoulder of an older man who looked full of hatred at the stranger outside of the cage.

"Let me guess", Cassy heard herself saying and looked at him again, "you are Derriks lunatic friend…?"

There was a flicker in his eyes, of anger and something she could not quite decipher, before he slowly was raising his gaze to something above her head.

"So you know this woman, old friend?"

"I have never seen her before", a voice answered, sounding strained with pain and sending a shiver down her spine, "but believe me: This girl is going to kick your ass…"

* * *

After Cassy had been dragged into the ground – after Fenris had not been FAST ENOUGH! – Aidan and he had fought against the rest of the Darkspawn.

The creatures had not stood a chance. Mainly because of Fenris: He had been so full of rage that he had come over them like a raging beast. But also, he had to admit to himself, because of Aidan, whose magic might not be offensive, but very useful: It had made them both faster and stronger, and his lightening magic had blinded the sensitive eyes of the Darkspawn, used to the dark.

Now they were standing over the corpses of the creatures and discussing what to do next.

"We have to find her!" Fenris barked for the third time and knew that he was not rational at all. On the other hand: He had heard Anders talk one time about what happened to the women down here – when they had been in the Deep Roads together with Hawke – and he would rather kill Cassy than let that happen to her!

"Fenris, calm down", Aidan said, also for the third time, and although part of him had the urge to slap the mage, he also knew that he was right. "Alright, we have no idea where she is. But fortunately you have a mage with you whose grandmother is a witch and taught him some tricks. So tell me: Do you have anything personal from her?"

"I know it does not seem like this, but we only know each other for a few days", Fenris growled.

Aidan sighed and then murmured: "Hair. Blood." His eyes ran over the ground. "Maybe we find some of her blood here…"

Fenris had frozen when he heard the words. "Do you want to use blood magic to find her…?" His voice sounded dangerous and threatening.

Slowly Aidan looked him in the eyes. "And if that would be the case? Would you rather give her up than have a good chance to find her…?"

There had been a time when Fenris would have said immediately: Yes. But now… Things had changed. With Hawke. With Cassy. Even though the former had refused blood magic, his own father had used it once and always been a good man. And Cassy… Fenris could not let her down.

"Relax", Aidan said. "Obviously you have forgotten that my grand-mother always taught me that it is dangerous and how shocked I have been when she told me that sometimes it might be useful as well." Aidan was right; this discussion had only taken place the day before. But it somehow seemed to be years ago. "It is no blood magic, just a tracking spell for which I need to use something very personal from her."

"Like hair…" Fenris commented.

"Yes, for example."

With a deep sigh he asked himself why he hadn't thought about it before and instead directly confronted Aidan with unreasonable accusations. Quickly he took the broken comb out of his baggage – he was not sure why he had kept it and not thrown it away – and gave it to the mage. Some strands of Cassys hair were between the spikes.

"Perfect", Aidan said with a relieved smile, took the hair and closed his eyes, murmuring some words. Only seconds later a small light rose from the hair and flew into the dark. "Let's follow it!"

Fenris was already on his way and Aidan quickly right behind him. He had to admit that the mage was from assistance and no handicap at all. Anders had been the same, but apart from that the apostate healer had also been too provocative and fanatic for Fenris. Aidan, on the other hand, seemed to care more for his friends than the mage's blight when he had to choose, and Fenris liked that.

"Thank you", he heard himself say without looking at the mage.

The answer followed shortly after his words: "You are welcome. So let's find Derrik and Cassy and get the hell out of here!"


	16. Savior

"I have never seen her before", a voice answered, sounding strained with pain and sending a shiver down her spine, "but believe me: This girl is going to kick your ass…"

She spun around and raised her gaze… to freeze right where she was standing. A man was crushed to the rock next to the lake, hold in place by a power she could not see, but only feel; Magic without a doubt, probably waved by the two Darkspawn standing directly below him.

The man was badly injured and without a doubt Derrik. He just looked like Cassy had imagined him to look like from Aidans description: His eyes hard and greyish-blue, his skin tanned and his shaggy brown-blond hair too long and "a mess" like Fenris would have said. Apart from that he did not seem to be very big for a human, but lean and trained.

White teeth flashed when he was smiling down at her, even though his face looked strained. "Nice ass. Want to go out for a date once we are out of here…?"

She stared at him, completely taken aback.

The lunatics sigh brought her back. "Still looking after every skirt crossing your way, isn't it so, Derrik?" It sounded bored, but also a little bit annoyed. "Don't you realize how incredible it is what I have discovered here? Don't you know how PROUD you should be that I am willing to let you participate in it?"

Derrik looked the other man into his eyes, slowly and deliberately answering: "Don't you know that you HAVE FUCKING LOST YOUR MIND, KEITH?"

Cassy couldn't help herself and chuckled, despite the ridiculous and horrible and dangerous situation. Keith's eyes became narrow, than he grabbed her arm and said: "For a man captured with Darkspawn magic to a stone wall, you risk a big lip!"

Derrik simply shrugged, as far as he was possible to do so. Then he became serious again. "Keith, look at you: You aren't even human anymore. I know, you did all of it to survive, but this… is wrong!"

"You don't understand", Keith only whispered, his voice giving Cassy the complete chill. "How could you. You don't know how it is to know that you will die, and only have the opportunity of blood and meat to survive… And then, after days, when you manage to raise, you are changed. You hear the song, but not really, only a bit. You feel the taint, but also your blood still pumping through your veins. And I just followed them… into the deep…"

"I know", Derrik said gently. "I know that you have been there for years. But why have you come back, Keith? To the place where you have been born? Only to bring all of your beloved ones here? What do you want from them?"

Keith's demeanor was changing from one instant to another and becoming angry again. "I want them to see! When I came back they thought I was crazy and ill. They wanted to chase me off. They even tried to kill me!" He shot the people in the cage an angry glance. "I thought I could live a normal live again, but then I realized that I belong here. To the dark! But still… I am neither a human nor a Darkspawn. I am something NEW!" Now his eyes were blazing fanatically. "And I will make sure not to stay the only one!"

Cassy froze. "What… what have you done?" she finally managed to whisper.

He snorted. "Unfortunately the Darkspawn have no desire to copulate with human. But in the deep I have discovered many places and old, forgotten magic…" He looked her into the eyes. "I will make you the mother of a new breed! You will become the first….!"

And that did it. She was not sure if Derrik had saved his reserves or simply lost control like she did, but they acted at one and the same moment: She escaped Keith's grab with a move she had used more than one time back in Denerim and rammed her knee in his crotch while Derrik was casting a spell who let the earth below the feet of the two Darkspawn, who held him captured, break open. They fell without a sound, and he was free again and jumped over the crater to the ground.

Cassy started to fight. She might have lost her daggers when she had been dragged into the earth, but she still had the knife in her boots and drew it while moving away from the hissing and cursing mage. In the next moment she had to face the Darkspawn who had brought her here and now was attacking her with his jagged blade.

She had no chance to fight against him with this small toothpick in her hand, so she threw herself between his legs when he was hauling off to probably split her in two pieces and cut through his Achilles heel. He growled and stumbled, and she was on her feet again and rammed the knife into the back of his neck. He fell like a stone to the ground, but when she turned, she already was facing two more Darkspawn.

Behind her she heard Derrik fighting quite verbally against his old friend, who was commenting every insult with one of his owns. If she had not been so occupied by defending herself, Cassy would have rolled her eyes due to the waste of breath. Magic flickered in the air, and she could only hope and pray that Derrik had somehow enough strength, even injured, to defeat the other mage.

In the end they found themselves back to back and bereft their power while Keith was approaching with a confident look on his face, accompanied by Darkspawn. In the background the jailed people were whimpering and crying and some of them cursing Keith.

"Sorry, Sweety", Derrik panted; "that does not look good for us…"

"Oh, how quick-witted you are", she hissed while her eyes were frantically running over the approaching Darkspawn. "Any Plan B?"

It was silent for a short moment, than he answered: "Well, yes, but you probably won't like it…"

"Does it involve breeding a new species?"

He coughed in a mixture of pain and amusement. "Well, no…"

"Then DO IT!"

"As Mylady wishes", was the last thing she heard … and then the caverns ceiling was starting to be crashing down as Derrik used his magic for a last, giant Force strike…

* * *

From one moment to another the stone walls were trembling violently around Aidan and Fenris, and without even looking at each other they started to sprint and burst into a huge cavern which ceiling was just crashing down.

It did not happen all at once, but it was obvious that it would be only a matter of time that the whole place would collapse. When entering the cavern, a cage with people was just scrunched by an immense rock, crashing Darkspawn as well and missing Cassy, who had been standing back to back with a man in the middle of the cavern, only shortly.

"Cassy!" he barked and shot forward, Aidan behind him.

The man in her back had in the meantime sunken to the ground, obviously unconscious, and the damn woman had nothing better to do than to drag him over the ground to a safer place under some rocks.

"The whole caverns will crash", Aidan cursed and threw himself to the side to avoid being crushed as well. "Shit..."

Fenris did not answer, but activated his lyrium and approached Cassy and the stranger. He seemed to have opened his eyes again, was saying something to her… and was he just patting her bossom?

Fenris growled and jumped, grabbing the stranger and ripping him away from her, more or less throwing him Aidan into the arms. Both crashed into each other and stumbled into a side arm of the cavern system which was only seconds afterwards locked by even more falling rocks.

"Are you nuts!?" Cassy welcomed him.

He did not answer, but swung her into his arms, whirled around… and jumped back as a pointed stone splitter in the length of his whole body rammed into the ground, directly in front of him.

His eyes flew over the room, but there was only crashing stones and rocks and dust left. In no way they would be able to reach any entrance in time, and even then…

The lake in the middle of the cavern captured his attention, and he started to run.

"Fenris, what are you…" Cassys words ended in a scream when he jumped with her into the water and dived.

A sharp rock hit his shoulder and ripped him away from her, ramming him to the ground of the lake. Panic rose while he tried to free himself, but part of his armor seemed to be trapped between the rock and the ground. Cassy swam to him and tried to free him, while more and more of the cavern ceiling was falling down on them and crashing into the lake. She must have seen in the meantime while he had jumped into the lake, namely an underground branch leading out of the cavern which was lighted by the red glowing lyrium, but still she refused to go.

Desperately he tried to push her away, but she simply slapped his hands to the side, pulled… and he was free again.

He had no idea how they made it, but they reached the outward flow right in time while everything was falling apart behind them.

His lungs started to burn when he was becoming short of air. But there was no place to be able to emerge from the water…

It could not end like this. He could not die here, not after all he'd been through, not after finally being free…

Strong hands grabbed his face, and suddenly soft lips pressed on his, forcefully opening his mouth so that Cassy could share her breath with him. When she let go off him, she signaled him in the red light of the lyrium markings to follow her. Only a moment later he saw what she had discovered and hectically approached with her the small cavern where they were able to grab some air.

When their heads rose out of the water, they both inhaled deeply. They had neither enough space to move, nor to get out of the water, but at least they had air.

"Are you alright?" they asked simultaneously and then stared at each other.

"What were you thinking?" she eventually hissed. "You could have died in there!"

"What were YOU thinking?" he answered WITHOUT thinking; "allowing this man to grab your ass!"

"WHAT?"

Fenris closed his eyes and tried to calm himself. "Never mind, let's just get the hell out of here", he growled and dived again before she was able to give him a smart-ass answer to his silly statement…

* * *

What were YOU thinking, allowing this man to grab your ass… ?

Cassy could not believe that Fenris had really asked this question. They had just fled out of a collapsing cavern, and he had nothing better to do than address reproaches to her?

True, she had also been taken aback when Derrik had opened his eyes again, murmured with a smirk "I knew you have a crush on me…" and patted her bottom before losing his conscious again, but he had been under shock and blood loss. On the other hand Fenris could not have known that, so actually his behavior was kind of flattering.

No, not flattering, but confusing. The whole damn man was a sole bewilderment for her!

They had been able to get out of the water half an hour ago and were following since this moment narrow tunnels and crossing dark caverns. In this part of the Deep Roads no red markings could be found, so they had to walk alongside the stone walls. It was not cold, but also not exactly warm, so their damp clothes clanged uncomfortably to their skin.

They were silent since the moment they had left the water, and Cassy had a lot of time to think about what had happened, how stupid Fenris had behaved… and how damn brave he had been.

She had heard the concern in his voice when he cried her name. And he had come to her, sprinting into a COLLAPSING cavern to save her life!

A part of her felt like a smiling princess who had just been saved by her prince.

Well, of course it was only a small part. A very small part…

When he trembled behind her, she immediately whirled around… and cursed herself for not thinking of his shoulder wound where the rock had hit him. He was glowing stronger than before, a faint shimmer of sweat on his face.

"Sit down", she said more harshly than planned and then added: "I am sorry. I haven't thought of it. But you really should stop being so damn stubborn and proud and start ASKING FOR HELP!"

"Don't yell at me", he growled warningly.

Of course he was right, so she just started to treat his wound as best as she could.

"Where's the dress when you need it", she murmured because she had no dressing material.

"I am fine. The bleeding already stopped."

"You look pale", was all she answered. "Let us rest now. It seems to be relatively save here. So far we met no Darkspawn…"

He opened his mouth – probably to argue with her – but she put her fingers on his lips, of course without thinking. "No arguing. Please." It sounded exhausted as well, and he eventually nodded.

They sat down on the ground and leaned against the stone wall behind them.

"How did you found me?" she asked after some minutes.

"Aidan was able to do a tracking spell", was all Fenris answered.

"So he might be able to find me again?"

"In case he is still alive: Yes, I guess so."

She closed her eyes. "Sounds good. I am just resting my eyes for a second… don't disturb me, Prick."

He chuckled. "From being calm? No way…"

His teasing answer was the last thing she heard before falling asleep from one moment to another. Obviously she was more exhausted than she had anticipated…

When she woke up again, she was lying on the ground, the warm body of a man in her back. Sleepily she turned around and snuggled against him, wrapping her arm around his waist and tangling her leg with his.

Mm, it felt good to wake up in a man's arms again. Warm and hard and vivid… and smelling soooo good…

That was the moment when she realized what she was doing… and with whom.


	17. Obsession

Cassy was falling asleep next to him so quickly that he had to hide a smile. Strange that even than when nobody could see him, he still had the feeling he needed to control himself.

Some minutes later her head sank down on his shoulder. He was listening to her breathing and knew without seeing her that she was sound asleep. A part of him pitied that he wasn't able to see her face and wondered what she would look like in her sleep. Would she be frowning or looking peaceful? Would she bit down her lip like she did so often when awake or not move at all…?

With a frown he pushed the thought to the side and tried to concentrate on the sounds around him instead. But it was calm, and only the soft sound of her breathing and the dropping of some water nearby could be heard…

When he caught himself by nearly falling asleep as well, he decided to lie down and gently put her to the ground, lying next to her on his back. His shoulder pulsed, and he had to choke a little moan.

Maybe he should have tried to stay awake, but he had learned that sometimes a short nap was much better than staying awake and becoming inattentively…

He was waking up when another body was snuggling against his and an arm and leg were wrapped possessively around him.

Part of him wondered why he did not panic. Why he did not get up to defend himself. Never before had he woke up like this, at least not as far as he could remember. Even back in Kirkwall, his friends had always been careful while waking him up in the morning, which had been rarely the case as he had been mostly the first one to get up.

Of course he knew who it was, wrapping herself around him like he was her own private blanket… Cassy. The scent of soap and blood rose from her hair, and for some strange reason he found both appealing.

He knew that he had to wake her up; had to get up. He also knew that even if he might pretend to still be sleeping, he was full awake, something he had learned during the years as fugitive.

Anyway: It just felt good to lie for a moment and just do nothing but savoring her presence…

He could clearly feel the moment she tensed, as clearly and loudly as he could hear her thinking. The thought let a smile appear on his lips, and without knowing why, he rolled on his back and pulled her with him, so that she was suddenly resting with her head on his chest and his arm came around her shoulder.

With closed eyes he waited what she would do and asked himself what the hell HE was doing…

Softly – carefully – he felt her fingers touch his chin. His markings were probably already glowing. By now it would have been time to end this because he did not want her to be hurt again… but it simply felt so good…

Her touch became more firm, and he could feel his markings aflame.

Without opening his eyes, he said: "I do not want to hurt you…"

It was silent for a long moment, than she answered: "I am a big girl, Fenris. I can take care of myself…"

Now he was opening his eyes at last, looking at her pale face in the duskiness around them. "Can you? I am not the one who had been captured by Darkspawn…"

"Oh, shut up!" was all she answered, her voice a mixture of annoyance, amusement and something else. "You really cannot admit that I am able to defend myself, can you? In case you have not realized: Before you came, Derrik and I had already killed half a dozen Darkspawn, all on our own…"

"Ah", he heard himself answering provocatively; "then I guess allowing him to touch you like he did was the reward for being such a good fighting partner…?"

She froze. Then she hissed and tried to get up, but he pulled her back to him… and crashed their lips together…

* * *

He did it again! He simply kissed her, and it felt so damn good that she forgot that he had been a jerk only seconds before. His lips opened hers, and then he took her mouth with his as if he had all the time in the world, deep and passionate and wet, setting her whole body on fire only with the touch of his tongue and the feeling of his lips on hers.

With a low moan she kissed him back… and then, suddenly remembering what he had said, she bit him on his lower lip.

He hissed and pulled back, looking at her confused, furious and passionate at the same time. They were now close enough to be able to see the others face.

"You cannot always kiss me when you want", she said and wished her voice would not sound so hoarse and… well, horny.

A slow smile spread on his face, and she struggled between hitting or kissing him again. "I thought you wanted me to kiss you again…?"

"That was before you made such stupid accusations…"

Immediately his face became angry. "He patted your bottom…"

"Oh", her eyebrows rose; "now you are polite again. I remember you saying something about grabbing my ass."

His eyes narrowed. "Don't tease me, Cassy!" It was clearly a warning and a challenge she could not resist.

Slowly she sank down on him, pressing her breasts to the breastplate of his armor. "Or what? Maybe you are just jealous that you did not have the opportunity to", she took his hand and laid it on her hip; "grab my ass…"

It was becoming silent while they were looking each other in the eyes, a nearly unbearable tension in the air which had nothing to do with the danger and insecurity of their situation. Cassy did hardly recognize herself; normally she was not the one who was so blunt in sexual situations, but… well, this damn prick seemed to need a knock against his stubborn head to see that she only had eyes for…

His lips were on hers again, this time soft and gentle, and the light touch immediately let her forget her anger. When she opened her mouth to his tongue, she tasted the blood on his lips from her bite and licked apologetically over the little wound. Somehow this seemed to affect him more than her body pressed to his, because his fingers closed more firmly around her hip and then, slowly and deliberately, moved lower… and closed over her backside.

She chuckled at his lips… and then she saw his face suddenly clearly, his eyes half closed and his beautiful lips playfully smirking, as a blue light appeared around the corner.

"They have to be here somewhere?" Aidans voice could be heard, followed by Derriks a little hoarse voice saying: "I certainly hope so. I have a date with the little Elven girl and her beautiful butt!"

Said butt was squeezed by the hand of a furious elf who let her go and stood up, bringing distance between them before the two mages appeared around the corner.

"Ah, you are safe!" Aidan said relieved and approached them quickly. "Are you hurt?" This question was addressed to Fenris whose shoulder plate was clearly damaged.

"It's nothing", he answered while watching Derrik out of narrow eyes.

The mage offered Cassy who was still crouching on the ground – where Fenris had left her – his hand and helped her up. "Hey, Sweety. I guess you saved my life and I have to thank you for it… well, before your friend threw me into Aidans arms…" Now his gaze went to Fenris and was sizing him up. "It looks as if I have to thank you too. But if you ever dare touching me again, we will have a serious problem, elf…"

It became calm, while Fenris markings slowly started to glow stronger and stronger. Pushing Aidan to his side, he made a step towards Derrik and said threatening: "Is that so… mage?"

* * *

The mood shifted immediately from bad to worse. It was more than obvious that Derrik was not used to subordinate, and neither was Fenris. Although Cassy was not quite sure if that was really the right word to describe the alpha wolf behavior of these two.

"Do we want to go and let the boys play, Aidan?" she turned to the only sane person left and smiled at the mage who had been looking from Fenris to Derrik and back.

His frown disappeared when she addressed him, and he smiled at her and nodded. "Sounds good."

Side by side they simply started to walk away and left the two men behind them. It only took some seconds, than they heard Fenris and Derrik follow them.

"Believe me, Sweety, no BOY would think what I think when I see your back…"

She tensed when she heard Derriks teasing words and heard Fenris growl warningly.

Aidan sighed and let himself fall back. "Let's talk, Derrik…"

The battle mage chuckled. "Oh, is Uncle Aidan now giving me a telling-off?" But he allowed the other mage to take him to the end of their little group.

While the two were talking, Fenris closed the gap to her. His silence was so reproachful that she could nearly hear it. "What?"

"Nothing…"

"Your NOTHING rings loadly and clearly in my ears…"

"You are making something up, Cassalia."

She snorted because she had learned during the few days she knew him that he was either furious or serious when he called her by her full name. "You are behaving childish", she said challenging and without looking at him.

"If I had known that you prefer blunt man, I would have…" He did not finish the sentence, but let it open.

"In case you haven't recognized", she hissed, her temper rising. "He wasn't the one I was kissing only minutes ago. Although I already ask myself if I have lost my mind. It must have been the shock!"

He growled, and out of the corner of her eyes she saw his markings glow stronger again.

"My, my", a voice from behind was commenting; "those markings of yours are really remarkable…"

Fenris did not stop, but she saw that every muscle in his body was clenching. Then he answered in a low tone: "Just come here and have a closer look, mage. Then you will see how very REMARKABLE they are…"

Derrik chuckled and laughed while Aidan said something to him, his voice annoyed.

The following hours were once in a while interrupted by Derrik saying something challenging and Fenris answering either nonchalantly or threatening, but apart from the two nothing happened. They met neither Darkspawn, nor lunatic mages, until they eventually found an old Dwarven thaig and a place where they could stay and rest.

Although Cassy had slept, she was already unbelievably tired again. Aidan gave her a gentle and reassuring smile and told her to sleep for a while while Fenris said that he would take over the first watch. None of the two mages argued because they were pale and exhausted from their use of magic and in Derriks case also the blood loss. Aidan seemed to have healed him, but still he had been injured badly.

It became silent soon, and Cassy listened to the breathing of the two men. Although she was tired, she could not find any sleep and turned around from one side to the other.

"You should try to sleep", Fenris eventually said, his deep voice calm.

"I am trying."

"Moving doesn't help."

"Maybe if you stop talking, it would help."

It became silent. Silly as it was she already was missing his voice.

Slowly she opened her eyes… and saw him staring above, his head lain in his neck, a strange expression on his face.

Alertly she followed his gaze… and froze.

They had chosen this place to rest because directly above them there was a thick vein of the stranges red markings which spent light. It had been scary first, but mainly they had been thankful. But now…. The vein seemed to glow even more intensely and covered Fenris with red light.

She rose slowly. "Fenris?"

He did not react, and a shiver ran down her spine.

"Fenris?" she repeated, this time more fiercely, and approached him.

Still no reaction, but his own markings had started to flicker. And if she had not known better – well, actually she DID not know better – she would have said that they were slowly starting to take over a faint red shimmer as well.

Slowly she placed her hand on his arm.

He whirled around and threw her to the ground, so quickly that only a small shocked gasp escaped her lips.

Her heart was hammering hard against her rips while she was looking into his face. He was cowering over her like an animal on the hunt, but did not see her. No words came over his lips, but his breathing was going heavy, and a faint shimmer of sweat was covering his face.

She did not mover, not sure how to react, but aware that every wrong movement might let him snap.

"Fenris, look at me!" she ordered.

A low growl came over his lips while his whole body seemed to tense. He was fighting; against what she could not say.

"Fenris", she tried again to reach him, but still no reaction.

"Aidan?" She had to raise her voice to make sure that the mage heard her, and Fenris became completely motionless, his eyes flickering to the two mages.

The growl which was following was completely animalistic. The next second he let her go… and charged into the direction of the two mages.

With a curse she jumped up and whirled around, only to see that Derrik was already casting a spell, and a stone first rammed into the chest of the Elven warrior and threw him back. He did not even flinch, but was already on his way back to the mage.

A cage of shimmering light surrounded and trapped him. He was snarling, then suddenly going to his knees and breathing heavily, as if trying to calm himself.

"What's happening?" she asked Aidan who had reached her in the meantime and was looking down at Fenris.

He inhaled deeply, worry in his eyes. "I have no idea…"


	18. Close

A part of Fenris heard Aidan say "I have no idea…", but this part was too small to react or answer logically. The bigger part of him – a part he had never met before – had been reduced to pure instinct, and he hated the feeling with everything he had inside of him.

He had already felt not all too well when they had set up their camp at this place, but had ascribed the feeling to his exhaustion. But then, more or less from one moment to another and directly after he had been annoyed with Cassys reaction, he simply had lost himself. First in a complete state of motionlessness, followed by a frenzy.

Cassy had not been the one who had provoked the last feeling. Actually her voice and her sight had been the only thing holding him back from simply losing it. But then he had heard Derrik move, and when he had looked at the mage, he had seen that Derrik DARED to look concerned at Cassy and furious at Fenris.

That had done it. She was HIS to protect! How could the damn mage claim to hold any rights to take over this task?

Of course part of him knew how damn irrational that thought was when he was the one towering over her. But, well…. He did not exactly think clearly at all…

And now he was trapped – in magic! He went to his knees and tried to calm himself, but realized soon that in no way he would be able to become himself again when he was TRAPPED! With a snarl he threw himself against the energy field, again and again, and could see how it started to flicker while Aidan was moving backwards, pulling Cassy with him, looking surprised and even more worried.

"Somehow he seems to be able to weaken the spell", he heard the mage say, and Derrik added: "Let him come. I let him make acquaintance with another stone fist…"

Furious he threw himself another time against the cage of magic and simply burst through it.

"Fenris, no!" was all he could hear – Cassy – when he silently and deadly came over his enemy and rammed the damn mage his fist in the chest.

Derrik choked and grabbed his wrist while someone else did the same – probably Cassy again.

"Stay away from her", he heard himself saying. "She is MINE to protect!"

"Easy…", the mage eventually managed to say and looked into his eyes. "Easy, my friend. I was simply worried to see you throwing her to the ground like a madman…"

Fenris froze and struggled between clenching the man's heart which was beating wildly in his hand or pulling back, trying to become sane again, trying to see that Derrik was right…

The mage simply waited, as did Cassy, who stood directly next to him. Then Fenris made a step back and pulled his hand out of Derriks chest.

The mage inhaled relieved and looked at him while Fenris was moving backwards. Cassys face was pale and shocked, while Aidan was watching him warily.

"You have a serious problem, my friend", Derrik said. "You know that, right?"

Fenris shook his head and answered hoarsely: "Then make sure that I don't hurt anyone and find a way to get me out of here…", he answered and added: "And I am NOT your friend…"

His back hit the stone wall behind him and he closed his eyes while he heard the two mages start arguing. Somehow he was a bit clearer than before, maybe because of freeing himself, but he could already feel how his anger starting to boil.

The scent of soap was rising into his nose, and he felt a warm body moving closer.

"Stay away!" he said without opening his eyes.

"No", was all she answered and took his hand in hers. "Come, let's get away from here. No matter what the two genius mages come up with: I know that the first thing we have to do is getting you away from this place."

Slowly he opened his eyes and nodded. "Stay close", it slipped over his lips when she went back to Derrik and Aidan.

She shot him a glance over her shoulder, and the sight of it provoked something primitive inside of him, possessive and wild. "I will", she answered. "But when this is over, you and I need to have a serious conversation!"

* * *

Fenris made sure that she stayed close at his side while they were walking, and Cassy allowed it because she somehow understood that it made him feel better. While they were wandering through the tunnels, the red light within his markings did not become stronger, but also not really weaker. It more or less stayed the same, and she worried about him.

"What is happening here?" she whispered into Aidan's direction and hoped that Derrik would just shut his mouth. Whenever the mage said something, Fenris growled and pulled her closer. Well, somehow that felt kind of nice, but on the other hand he was clearly not himself…

Or maybe he was? More than he usually was?

Oh, forget it Cassy, she told herself and tried at the same time to ignore the heat from his hand which was lying on her waist. Don't think his behavior has anything to do with real affection for you…

But that was exactly was she thought. That somehow these red markings had influenced him in a way that his TRUE feelings and desires were shown.

And she was flattered. Silly as it was she was really flattered.

She had never been the kind of girl men fought about. And she had never wanted to be that kind of girl and made fun of men who made themselves to idiots for a girl. But now…. She had to admit that it felt kind of good. It was ridiculous and pathetic to think like that when Fenris clearly suffered from the situation. But she simply could not change it.

"I am quite sure that the effect this red lyirum has on him will fade once we leave the Deep Roads", Aidan answered calmly and put his hand on her shoulder.

Fenris immediately shot him a glance and pulled her closer, pressing her body to his.

Carefully Aidan pulled his hand back and looked at her worriedly. "You don't have to allow him to touch you like that", he said and ignored Fenris warning growl. "You know that, right…?"

"I won't hurt her", Fenris hissed, but Aidan still ignored him and looked Cassy into the eyes.

"I am fine", she said and smiled at him reassuringly. "I trust him."

Aidan nodded, although not really looking convinced, and shot Fenris a glance.

"Oh, let him have some fun, Uncle Aidan", Derrik teased from behind. "This will be the only option he has to touch my girl…"

"Derrik", Aidan hissed, while Fenris froze next to Cassy.

She simply freed herself from his touch and turned to the battle mage. "You have to do more to become MY BOY than simply bully, you know…?" she said and watched him annoyed. Why the hell couldn't he simply shut up?

He smiled at her. "Oh, I like a challenge…"

She rolled her eyes and touched Fenris who had turned as well. "Don't test your luck, mage", the Elven warrior said, his voice a bit calmer than before, but Cassy heard how much effort it took him to control himself. "You can be lucky that we nearly have left the Deep Roads…"

"… and you are no Madman anymore?" Derrik ended his sentence with a challenging note to his voice.

"That's not what I meant", Fenris answered, his voice threatening. "As I said: Don't test your luck." And with these words he simply dragged her with him and approached the exit they had found minutes before.

She allowed it, at least until they were out of Derriks sight. Then she moved away from him. "Don't treat me like a puppy!"

He shot her an angry glance. "I told you: I just want to protect you!"

"And I told you that I am able to take care of myself", she answered and inhaled deeply the fresh air of the coniferous forest in which they arrived when leaving the Deep Roads. Without waiting for Fenris' answer she turned and watched their surroundings. "I guess it's no good sign that here is an entry to the Deep Roads…?" she commented.

"We can send a note to Vigils Keep and inform the Warden Commander", Aidan said from behind. "But let's find a place to rest first…. preferably far away from red lyrium."

Cassy nodded and smiled at him what let Fenris growl again. She rolled her eyes and gave Aidan an apologetic smile while allowing the Elven warrior next to her to hold her close. Derrik was finally wise enough to not irritate Fenris more, and when they found some old Avarr ruins, they decided to stay there over night.

Fenris did not say anything; he simply took her hand and dragged her with him. Cassy nodded into Aidans and Derriks direction and followed the elf behind a stone wall, where he let go off her and sat down, his head bent.

"I… am sorry", he said hoarsely. "But I need distance to them." He did not add that he wanted her to stay, but she was quite sure that that would have been his next words.

Or maybe she simply hoped for it.

While clearing her throat she sat down next to him and leaned against the old wall in her back. She could imagine how embarrassing this whole situation would be for him once over, because she would have felt the same. So she simply said: "Let's rest, Fenris. And don't worry. I met men behaving worse than you, and they have not been influenced by some strange red lyrium…"

His head immediately shot around, and she knew that telling him this might not have been the best idea…

"Who?" he snarled. "Did they hurt you?"

She stared at him and then simply shook her head, having suddenly a big lump in her throat. Never before somebody had reacted like that. Not when it came to her…

"I… let's sleep now", she managed to say and lay down, turning her back to him.

* * *

Fenris watched her back and tried to clear his mind through the fogginess surrounding it. HAD she been hurt? Was that the reason why she was not able to look at him? Or was it something else?

He could not tell, due to so many reasons: Because he was not himself right now and he knew NOTHING about feelings and relationships and closeness with another person.

But he knew that he could not allow her to stay alone right now; and neither did he want to stay alone by himself. So he carefully took of his armor off, not to hurt her, and lay down next to her.

She stiffed, and he hesitated. Could he dare touching her when she might have had bad experiences in the past? Shouldn't he try to control himself…?

In the end his instinct won, and he carefully put his arms around her and pulled her to his chest. She stayed rigid for a moment, but then became pliable and soft in his arms.

He felt relieved and pressed his face into her hair, inhaling its scent. It was a mess again, but he loved it… Liked it, he corrected himself immediately and hid a confused smile.

They were silent for a long moment, but he knew that she wasn't asleep. Eventually he asked: "Were… you hurt by someone?"

"No", she answered immediately, and he knew that she wasn't lying and relaxed. "I am fine. Try to sleep now." Her hand closed over his lying on her stomach and stroked it gently.

The touch was unexpected and pleasant, provoking several feelings in him. Not all of them he was able to identify. There was a familiarity he should not have felt for a woman he only knew for such a short time, but still it was there. And there was the passion rising again that he had felt when he had kissed her. But the strongest feeling was a feeling he had never felt before for anyone else, and he wasn't able to identify it.

"Stop thinking, Fenris", her sleepy voice reached his ears.

"I wasn't aware that you are a mind-reader…?" he answered, thankful that he was a bit clearer again.

She chuckled, suddenly taking his hand in hers… and placing a kiss on his back.

They froze simultaneously. It clearly had not been her intention to do that, but instinct. The touch of her lips let fire run through his veins, and he pressed closer to her back.

With everything he had he tried to hold back. He would never forgive himself if he touched her now, in this state, with her so vulnerable next to him, without her permission…

Her lips touched his hand again, and this time he felt the touch of her tongue.

With a low growl he closed his eyes and pressed his face into her hair, involuntarily rocking against her while he hardened. "Don't do that", he whispered.

"Don't hold back", she answered and pressed into him, her voice as hoarse as his.

"I am not myself", he managed to say and fought a moan.

She froze… and moved away. "Of course. I am sorry. I don't want to molest you…" She did not sound angry, at least not with him, but more with herself.

He knew immediately that he had made a mistake again and cursed himself. Why wasn't he ever able to find the right words?

"Cassy", he heard himself say, his voice serious and firm. "Look at me…"

She hesitated, than turned, her face betraying nothing.

"I want to be completely myself when I…. when you allow me touching you again", he managed to say while looking at her.

Her eyes widened. Had she understood? Or had he again chosen the wrong words…?

A slow smile spread on her face, telling him that he had finally been right. Then she turned, taking his hand and dragging his arm around her waist. "Alright, than let's sleep now, Prick. And don't you dare to forget your promise in the morning …"


	19. A promise

Cassy sighed contently when she woke up in the morning. Finally she had been able to really sleep, and Fenris warmth in her back had taken the chill of the night away.

What had felt strange at first, hade soon become more than a bit enjoyable. She did not know if it was due the red lyrium he still had in his system or simply his habit, but he was a possessive sleeper: Wrapped his arms around her, he had followed her every movement, snuggling into her and pressing his face into her hair.

Never had she thought that she could like such a behavior, but the truth was: Here, with him, she loved it…

When she opened her eyes and turned on her back, she saw that his eyes were still closed, but his hair damp. So he had already stood up and cleaned himself… and come back to her, despite the fact that only a faint red shimmer in his markings was left.

Slowly she rose as well and saw him blinking. It was adorable, but she would rather bit her tongue than tell him…

"I am just going to the lake", she whispered, and he let her – hesitatingly – go.

She hurried to come back to him, her heart hammering. It was so stupid…. Probably he would have gotten up in the meantime and joined the mages…

But when she came back, he was still lying where she had left him, and she lay down next to him again, turning her back to him… and waiting.

Immediately she was back in his arms and had to hide a smile. He wasn't exactly relaxed, but also not tense as a stone. Which was a good sign…

Silence, heavy and loud, was lying between them, and she closed her eyes, not knowing what to do, only realizing that she had never before in her life been so insecure and twitchy.

When he moved and let his hand travel from her wrist over her arm, she shivered. He immediately stopped, and she bit her lip. Then she stroked her hair to the side and offered him her vulnerable neck in an instinctive gesture.

A low growl came over his lips, and she felt him harden. Heat shot through her body and intensified when his lips found her neck, in a fierce, hungry caress. She also felt a hint of his teeth, followed by a stroke of his tongue, and became pliable in his arms, moving against him.

He continued caressing her skin while his hand wandered over her upper arm and then to her throat.

She closed her eyes and fought a moan when his strong fingers closed over it, in a completely possessive gesture she would have never allowed anyone else. But now… She had never been more aroused in her life, and he hadn't even really touched or kissed her yet.

Apart from his mouth on her neck, kissing and sucking, driving her mad. When she thought she could not take it anymore, she turned on her back and forcefully brought his lips to hers, melting them together.

He moaned, and then Cassys mouth was taken in a deep, wet, open-mouthed kiss. Within seconds Fenris was between her legs, and although they were both fully closed, she had the feeling she could feel him with every part of her body… especially one part of her when he was rocking rhythmically against her, his erection moving against the most intimate part of her.

Choking her moans by returning his kiss feverishly, she moved against him and felt her hunger and passion rise with every passing second. It was so damn long ago that someone else had touched her. And never before it had been done like he did it, as if he was starving and could not get enough from her…

A protesting sound came over her lips when he suddenly moved to the side, and she opened her eyes, looking at him in confusion.

Her mouth went dry when she saw his look: His eyes were half closed and following his hand which was traveling over her throat to her breasts while the other hand was tangled in her hair.

She closed her eyes again when he gently squeezed one breast through the thin material of her shirt… and then let his hand wander under the waistband of her trouser…

Her legs opened instinctively for his fingers, and then she lost herself completely in the feeling of him touching her, his caress gentle and firm, testing, teasing. She knew that he was watching her face throughout the whole time, but wasn't able to look at him, but simply FEEL. Pleasure was rising, and she knew that when it hit, she would cry….

When the orgasm crashed down on her, she grabbed his shirt and pulled him into another kiss, nearly sobbing, while rocking against his hand. He returned her kiss and stroked her gently through the tremors running through her body, until she lay sated and rested next to him.

Slowly she opened her eyes… and heard Derrik cheeringly say on the other side of the wall: "When you are ready… it's breakfast time…!"

* * *

The sound that came over his lips was full of menace and showed him that there was still a rest of red lyrium in his body influencing him. But not enough to think that what Cassy and he had just shared, might have been against his – or her – will. Actually when he had woken up next to her in the morning, he had wanted her even more than the evening before…

Anyway, it was obvious that the damn mage had been eavesdropping when he had brought Cassy to pleasure, and the thought of it drove Fenris mad. Time to make sure that Derrik finally understood not to mess with him…

He was already half way up, a louder growl on his lips, when Cassy rose, threw her arms around his neck and pulled him down on her, placing a gentle, reassuring kiss on his lips. "Shhh… let me do this…" And then she pushed him upwards, sitting on his lap and giving him a deep and proper kiss that everybody would be able to see.

"Good morning, Derrik", she commented and turned to the mage who had stopped halfway back to the fireplace and looked at them, taken aback and speechless. "I hope you also had a great night… like me…"

Aidan chuckled next to the fire and shook his head, while Derrik caught himself and shot her a wide smile. "I had. Full of pleasant dreams about you and me…"

Fenris froze under her, but Cassy simply stroked his back and said sweetly: "Well, that shows me clearly that you don't really know me at all. Otherwise your dreams about me wouldn't be PLEASANT at all…"

Now Fenris chuckled and felt her legs warningly and teasingly clench around his hips. With a slow smile he let his hands run above her lower back… and squeezed.

She flinched and bit her lower lip while Derrik simply shrugged and said: "Come! It's time to discuss what we are going to do next!"

Fenris did not really care what the mages wanted to discuss. He also did not think of his plans to find his sister. All he could think about at the moment was the woman in his arms.

He had no idea what he should think, at least feel. Yesterday he had not been himself, but when he had woken up in the morning, he had thought, that maybe – just maybe – a part of him had been VERY MUCH himself, at least when it came to Cassy. And to be honest: His complete irrational behavior the day before had been about Cassy.

He was confused. Insecure. But also tempted to discover where this might lead…

Their eyes met, and he thought to see the same insecurity in her gaze than she must see in his. "I… I am not good in these kind of things…", he heard himself say. The truth was: He had no idea about these kind of things. Although he was in the meantime remembering how it was to be intimate with a woman, he had never been in a real relationship before. Before going to Danarius he had simply enjoyed his life – and women. And then… he had not enjoyed anything at all…

"Neither am I", she answered and stood up slowly. "Let's just… not make a big thing of it, alright? Let's just see where it leads…"

He could hear the hesitation in her voice when she spoke the words and wasn't sure if she wished him to say something. Did she want to end it? Or did she want him to tell her that it WAS a big thing?

And what was it HE wanted?

Annoyed about his own confusion he got up as well, put on his armor and followed Cassy to the fireplace. Derrik welcomed them with a salacious grin Fenris wanted to slap the mage out of his face, while Aidan smiled friendly and said: "I am glad to see that you feel better."

Fenris nodded and added: "Thank you. And my apologies for my behavior."

"No need to worry, elf", Derrik answered generously. "Actually it was quite funny watching you behave like a possessive fool…"

"Derrik!" Aidan and Cassy hissed simultaneously while Fenris felt heat rise to his face, out of anger and embarrassment.

Slowly turning to the mage, he made a decision…

"No need to worry, elf", Derrik answered generously. "Actually it was quite funny watching you behave like a possessive fool…"

"Derrik!" Cassy hissed together with Aidan while she saw Fenris blush slightly and turn to the big-mouthed mage.

For a long moment he was simply watching the other man, and Derrik was slowly rising an eyebrow. Even though he tried to hide it, she had the impression that he became a bit unsettled under Fenris' staring glance.

"At least I was obsessed by lyrium while you are acting foolish every second of the day."

Cassy started to grin and could not help herself: She put her hand on Fenris leg and squeezed.

Derrik started to grin as well. "Ah…. Not only a grim demeanor, but also some wit… I haven't expected that…"

"Just keep on behaving like you do", Fenris answered and put his hand on Cassys lower back, in a – it seemed – unconscious gesture; "and you will see it even more often."

"Fair enough!" was all the mage said as reply and then turned to his breakfast.

Next to her, Cassy could feel Fenris relax a bit and leaned into his direction. "I am proud of you", she teasingly said.

He looked at her and raised an eyebrow. "Of what?"

"That you did not blow him into little bits."

"The day is young", he answered dryly, and she giggled and then made a face. Ah, she did it again… like a love-sick young girl…

A genuine smile appeared on his face while he was watching her, and she felt his thump stroke over her back. Remembering what they had shared only minutes ago, heat slowly started to rise again, and her throat was suddenly dry.

She could not believe that she had really allowed him to do that, so close to the other's… But she had simply not been able to restrain herself. The way he had kissed and touched her, the way he had LOOKED at her… Only remembering it made her pulse jump again.

Clearing her throat she looked to the side and removed her fingers from his leg.

This was… too much; too soon; too unexpected.

Too damn fantastic and exhilarating and exciting.

Fenris was frowning slightly when he saw her backing off and then removed his hand as well, turning to Aidan. "So, I guess you owe me an answer: Where is my sister?"

Aidan's answer came immediately and without playing any games or trying to bargain again. He was an honest man. "She is in our camp: A place where mages can hide."

"You mean apostates?" Fenris commented darkly.

"If you want to call them that: Yes. They – we – are apostates", Aidan confirmed calmly.

"Then show me where this place is", Fenris ordered.

Aidan hesitated for the first time, and Fenris tensed. Then he leaned into the direction of the mage and added: "You promised. Or aren't you better than any other of your kind in the end…?"

Fury, unexpected and wild, rose in Aidan's eyes, turning his face into a mask of anger. "Like MY KIND? Have I done anything within the last hours justifying your anger and hate? And what about Derrik", he pointed into the direction of the other mage who simply was following their little discussion; "he may be a fool sometimes, but he fought to FREE these people! With his life!"

"People who had been captured by one of his friends", Fenris hissed, anger radiating from every part of his body, probably fueled by the rest of the lyrium in his system. At least this was what Cassy guessed, considering his irrational behavior and the slightly flickering of his markings.

"You won't see your sister", an old voice suddenly interrupted their discussion; "at least not unless we can be sure that you won't betray us!"

* * *

Fenris went completely motionless and then slowly turned to Aidans grand-mother who had appeared between the trees, again wearing nothing but her skin, surrounded by long, grey hair.

Cassy would never learn to see the old woman like this, but Fenris simply watched her out of narrowed eyes and said: "What does that mean, witch!?"

"That you have to prove yourself first", she simply answered.

Fenris did not like what he heard. Not at all.

"And I guess "proving" myself means something I won't like", he answered and tried to calm down his temper. He had to keep a clear head.

"Grand-Mother, what are you up to?" Aidan asked and sounded suspicious as well, a fact that did not exactly calm Fenris down.

She approached and took his cape to twine it round her fragile figure. "A soul ritual."

Derrik chuckled and said: "Oh, this will be interesting…"

"If you think that I am willing to participate in some kind of magic ritual, you are mistaken, old woman", Fenris heard himself answer.

"Could someone please talk clearly?" Cassy interfered. "I have no idea what you are talking about. And to be honest: I also don't like the sound of this!" Turning to Aidan she added: "Aidan, I know that Fenris seems sometimes… a bit aggressive when it comes to mages, but I thought that you and he had a deal?"

It was strange having someone come to his assistance. Of course Hawke had been doing it throughout all those years, but… well, not after such a short time. And certainly not with the kind of anger and passion Cassy just radiated.

"You have to understand that we need to be careful", Aidan replied calmly. "There are people depending on the decisions I take, and although I'd like to, I cannot trust Fenris. Not after what I have seen…"

"But he has been influenced by this shitty lyrium", Cassy erupted and then looked at Fenris who had put his hand on her arm.

Even though he did not like what the witch was suggesting, he knew that she was right. He had indeed not behaved in a trustable way and probably would have taken the same decision.

"What do you want me to do?" he asked the old woman. He had come for a reason to Ferelden, and the reason was to find his sister.

Aidans grand-mother was watching him intensely and then slowly smiled: "Such a brave boy. You don't need to be worried: I will not touch your mind or memories or soul. Instead, I will allow you to touch MINE!"

Fenris froze, exchanging a look with Aidan who seemed to be as frustrated and confused as he felt. Derrik had leaned back as if watching an interesting play while Cassy was moving from one food to another.

"I am not sure how this should work", he eventually answered; "but I am ready."

"Good, good", the witch answered and started to busily turn to the two mages. "You", this was addressed at Derrik; "don't just sit there and look like a dumbhead! Go and fetch more wood."

Derrik looked clearly confused and then was springing dramatically to attention.

The old ladies eyes became narrow. "Don't you be sassy, boy."

"I'd never dare, Granny", he answered with a wide grin and then moved into the direction of the nearest tress. "Want to help me, Cassy?" he asked before passing them and shot the Elven woman a suggestive glance over his shoulder.

Fenris frowned and fought the growl building deep in his throat.

"The girl stays here", the old lady answered for Cassy who had been scowling at Derrik; "I need her to calm down her friend. She has a good influence on him." Turning to her grand-son she added: "You need to collect herbs – You know which ones, do you?"

Aidan nodded. "I don't like that, Granny. Doing the ritual will open your mind to the demons…"

"Oh, boy, believe me: I know the temptation of demons, and they already have offered me something in the past that was the most precious for me. But I refused, so don't worry." When she said that, the sound of her voice had changed, speaking of loss and hurt.

And for the first time Fenris worried what she might want to show him…

Cassy stared at the old witch who was preparing whatever strange ritual this might be, distributing the herbs Aidan had collected around the fireplace and humming quietly. Her Grand-Son was watching her with a frown on his face, and Derrik was carving strange symbols in one of the branches he had brought with him out of the wood.

In the meantime, Fenris was becoming next to her more rigid with every passing second.

She did not like what was happening here. She did not like that the three mages were asking Fenris to do a ritual to prove something he had already proven before: That he was trustworthy, strong and loyal. All of them knew that his irrational behavior had come from the influence of the red lyrium, and even then, instinct-driven as he had been, he had not hurt Derrik… And he would have had every reason doing that, considering how the mage had behaved.

It was not right that they forced him now to participate in something he clearly did not want to participate in. His jaw was hard like stone, and his lips pressed together. Deep in his green eyes she saw distress… and more. Something deeper: A fear and a hate he probably would never be able to overcome completely.

In the same moment in which she opened her mouth to tell all of them that they should go to hell with the ritual and Fenris and she would find a way to get to Varania, he said: "No!"

Aidan looked up, and Derrik interrupted his carving. Aidans Grand-Mother slowly rose and turned to him.

"What do you mean, son?" she asked gently, and Cassy became immediately suspicious. What was the old lady up to?

"I said no", Fenris repeated, his voice determined and calm. "You have no reason to distrust me. I fulfilled my part of the deal, and now I want that you fulfill yours." He was not looking at the old lady anymore, but at Aidan. "Decide. But know for sure: I WILL find my sister, no matter what!"

Aidan had frozen while Derrik was slowly rising. Cassy felt her stand change, becoming more tense and ready to charge if necessary.

For a long moment it was completely silent between them, and tension was lying in the air. Then Aidan sighed, nodded and answered: "You are absolutely right, Fenris. I apologize for my stupid behavior." He offered him his hand. "And I thank you for your help. You did more than simply fulfilling your oath down there – you risked your life…"

"Oh, come on…", Derrik commented and rolled his eyes, but Aidan stopped him with a rigid movement of his hand.

Cassy relaxed and intently waited for Fenris' reaction.

He took Aidans' hand and shook it, obviously firm enough to make the mage flinch. When Aidan turned to his Grand-Mother, the old woman was watching Fenris and him with a satisfied smile on her face. "Good boys. Both of you. You passed the test successfully."

The elf and the mage were frowning simultaneously and asking: "Which test?"

Derrik burst out in laughter, but it stopped when the old woman turned to him and strictly said: "You failed, son! It is time that you learn to restrain yourself!"

The mage's eyes became narrow. "I am more than able to RESTRAIN myself, old woman. But when I see something I like, I go for it." His eyes went to Cassy. "And when I see something I DON'T like, I fight it." Now he was looking at Fenris.

"What are you?" Cassy hissed. "A dog?"

"I am whatever you want me to be, Sweety", was all she received as answer.

Unnerved, she turned and saw Fenris watching her. He seemed to be relaxed again, and relieved as well.

Before she knew what she was doing, she took his face in her hands and kissed him firmly. "I am proud of you, Prick!"

He had put his hands on her hips and was slightly crooking his head when he heard what she was saying. At first she was sure that he would give her a smart-ass answer, but then he simply said: "Thanks for your help."

"I… uhm." Suddenly she was at loss for words, and it did not become better when she saw him starting to smirk and move closer, coming so near that she could feel the heat of his body. "You are welcome…"

"Alright, turtledoves," said the old hag Cassy wished far, far, faaaar away in this moment; "it's time to go and see your sister, boy."


	20. Curiosity

"Alright, turtledoves," said the old hag Cassy wished far, far, faaaar away in this moment; "it's time to go and see your sister, boy."

Cassy shot the witch an evil look who returned it with a chuckle. "Easy, girl. There will be more than enough time for the two of you to be alone once we are in the camp…"

Even without looking at Fenris, Cassy felt her cheeks coloring, grabbed her baggage and started to walk. The three men followed her and probably the witch as well. To be honest: She did not really care if the old woman was still with them. And to be even more honest: Actually it would be quite pleasant if she did not need to see this woman anymore, who preferred to appear naked between trees and talked about strange rituals to do even stranger tests.

The old witch fulfilled her wish only half an hour later by turning into a crow and flying away, telling beforehand that she would announce their arrival.

Cassys eyes followed the bird which was soon becoming smaller in the distance. "Can you change into an animal as well?" she heard herself asking and turned to Aidan.

"No." He shook his head. "I guess I am too… rational for this kind of magic. The thought of changing my form disturbs me, and this is never a good basis for learning a spell."

"I will never understand you", Derrik interfered. "You are such a strong mage, and still you prefer doing only little, magical prestidigitations…"

"Those magical prestidigitations have helped us more than one time in the past", Aidan answered dryly. "Honestly, Derrik, why can't you just shut up for a moment?"

"Wohoo", the battle mage laughed and was rising his hands in defense. "No need to get grumpy, Uncle Aidan. You are hurting my feelings…"

Aidan, Cassy and Fenris sighed all three at the same time. Derrik chuckled and Cassy had to give him that he really did not seem to care what anybody was thinking about him.

Her eyes fell on the two rings he was wearing on a shackle around his neck.

"Aren't those weddings rings?" she asked without thinking.

His smile faltered a bit. "Yep. That's right, Sweety."

She frowned. "Are you married?"

"Jealous?"

She snorted. "Not a bit. And I am afraid I am not the one who should be jealous, but your wife…"

He shrugged. "Maybe she knows what she has in me: A man always willing to… perform…"

"Will you start giving me a serious answer", Cassy interrupted the mage; "or do you prefer continuing to talk bullshit?"

Suddenly his face became completely serious… and sad.

Cassy gulped. This look… She did not have wanted to bring bad memories with her question back.

"It belonged to my wife", he eventually said, his voice quite. "She… died. I could not save her… She died in my arms, taken away by an illness I wasn't able to defeat…"

Silence washed over them. Cassy shot Aidan a short glance, but he looked surprised as well. Obviously he had also not known this story…

"I… I am sorry, Derrik…"

The mage nodded abruptly, than turned … and hesitated.

Looked back at her.

And started to smirk. "Nahhhh. Just kidding…. They simply belong to my parents who loved each other, but eventually died and that's it…."

Speechlessly she stared at him and could not believe that somebody was actually more insolently than she had ever been…

"You are such an idiot!" she eventually managed to say and made a move towards him, not really angry, but at least giving the impression as if she wanted to slap him.

He laughed, captured her hands and pulled her to him. "Oh, come on, Sweety. That was just a jo…"  
He froze when he suddenly felt her knife press against his crotch. "Ohhh… this cat has claws…"

"Welcome to my world", Fenris chuckled and then added much more darkly: "And now let go of her, mage!"

Derrik grinned and held her a moment longer pressed to him, than made a step back. "She's all yours, elf. At least for now…"

Rolling her eyes, Cassy put her knife back in her belt, and they continued their travel.

For once nothing dramatic or dangerous or crazy was happening. They were walking the whole day and enjoying the warm autumn sun. In the evening they set up a camp nearby the path they had been following and prepared for the night. Cassy was hunting, Fenris was making fire together with Aidan, and Derrik was taking a bath in the small river next to them, singing a tavern song that would have brought a blush on the face of even a whore.

They did not talk a lot, mainly because Aidan was lost in thoughts and Derrik still seemed to be exhausted from what he had experienced during the last days.

Fenris was even calmer than he usually was. When they went to bed and Aidan took over the first watch, Cassy approached him.

"Are you alright?"

He looked up to her and nodded, but she knew that he was lying. So she simply sat down next to him and waited for him to either talk or sent her away.

"I am just thinking about my sister", he eventually said.

She was not sure why, but she had expected this answer. Even though he was looking for Varania, he always seemed tense when it came to her. "What happened between the two of you?" she dared to ask.

He hesitated for a long moment and finally started to talk. "This is… hard to explain. I did not remember her for quite some time. The ritual which gave me my markings also took my memory from me. So for years I was only my master's bodyguard. Then something happened and I could escape. I was on the flight until I came to Kirkwall, met Hawke… and in the end he helped me to kill my master who eventually found me to bring me back…"

Again he was silent, and she waited patiently for him to continue. It was obvious that it was hard for him to tell her this, and she had the feeling that she could feel honored that he did after such a short time of knowing each other.

"Anyway", he ended, his voice sounding suddenly hart; "I also met Varania again, but I chased her off. I had my reasons, at least I thought so. But now… There are things I need to know, need to find out. "

Cassy knew that he did not tell her everything, but that was fine. Within the last few minutes she had learned more about him than she had hoped for.

She was searching for something she could say to him, but found no words. So she simply stayed silent and sat next to him, looking into the night. After some long minutes, tension started to rise between them, and she started to get up. "I… uhm… will go to bed now."

He did not hold her back. It was stupid to hope that he would ask her to stay, especially when he was so obviously lost to his memories and worries. But still she could not forget how it had felt to sleep next to him, to be hold and…

"You could stay."

She froze and hesitantly turned to him. "You don't have to…"

But he was already lying down and giving her some room. Quickly she fetched her blanket and was putting herself to sleep next to him.

It took her some time to find sleep. He was near enough that she could feel the heat of his body, but just the same he seemed to be far away, lost in his thoughts. Eventually she took his hand in hers and gently squeezed it, than let go of it and turned, finally falling asleep.

She woke within the night when he was turning to her in his sleep and snuggled into her. Only minutes afterwards she was laying again in his arms, pressed to his chest, his embrace as possessive as in the last night.

With a smile she put her hand on his and fell asleep again.

On the next morning she was waking up by his careful attempt to free himself from her grip. Without opening her eyes she said: "So, you are not only a snuggler when you are under the influence of red lyrium, but in general…"

Fenris first reaction was to simply deny this statement. It was ridiculous to even THINK about him in such a way. On the other hand: When he had been woken up, his legs had been tangled with hers, his arm wrapped around her waist and his face pressed into her hair. So there were no real options for him to call her a liar.

"Have you lost your voice?" she added teasingly.

A smile was forming on his face, and without thinking he was pulling her closer again. "No", he answered. "I guess I am just surprised about myself."

She chuckled. "Oh come on. Don't tell me that I am the first woman you are treating like this…"

He knew that she could feel him freeze, because she was suddenly tensing herself. How could he explain that she was in fact the first woman since he had lost his memories he was allowing so close? That he did not remember clearly how it had been before, even though he at least recalled a bit? His lack of experience when it came to this kind of relationships had never worried him, because it had been safer being alone. But now, with her, with coming to Ferelden and being on his own for the first time in years, things had changed.

"Did I say something stupid…?" he heard her ask, and even though she tried to sound calm, he thought to hear insecurity as well.

"No", he answered hastily. "It's just…" Embarrassing? Odd? He did not know what to say and how to explain, so he simply stayed silent.

Slowly she was turning on her back and looking at him. "As I said, Fenris: We don't need to make a big thing of what has happened between us. I certainly don't want you to marry me or something like that. And if you think this is no good idea, tell me right away…"

He muffled her last words by kissing her, seeing no other way to show her that he WANTED what was growing between them, but simply did not know how to deal with it.

She returned his kiss, but then suddenly pushed him away. "You cannot kiss me whenever you are at loss for words!" she said in a mixture of amusement, anger and passion.

All he could do was to shrug, and she watched his face intently and then sighed. "You are really strange, Prick."

He frowned. "I told you…"

"… you don't like to be called like that. Yeah, I got it!" Now she was smiling again and briefly stroking about his cheek. "Alright, let's get up and discuss this later…"

Relieved he nodded and followed her to the fireplace. Aidan was still sound-asleep, and Derrik sitting with the back to them and staring into the distance.

A sudden thought came to Fenris mind, and he asked with a frown: "Why haven't you woken us to take over your watch…?"

"You two lovebirds have looked so peacefully", the mage answered without turning; "so I did not dare to disturb you…"

Fenris glanced into Cassys direction and saw her blush slightly in a mixture of anger and embarrassment.

"So you thought it would be better to risk to fall asleep?" she asked.

Now Derrik was looking at her over his shoulder, grinning suggestively. "Don't worry, Sweetie. I have made me A LOT of warm thoughts to stay awake…"

Groaning she turned away and woke up Aidan, while Fenris caught Derriks glance. The mage was questioningly raising an eyebrow. "What?"

"I don't want to repeat myself, but obviously it is necessary: Keep your distance!" His voice sounded calm, but threatening.

"Ah… I see…" A slow smile was appearing on Derriks face. "I wasn't aware that it is already so deep…"

Fenris frowned. "I don't know what you mean…"

Derriks smile changed into a grin. "Your crush on her…"

Cassy froze when she heard Derrik address the words at Fenris. Glancing at Aidan who was just rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, she saw that he was ignoring the two men although she was quite sure that he had heard Derrik's words as well.

"I don't see why this should be any of your business?" Fenris just replied, and Cassy could not interpret the sound of his voice.

Not that it mattered. Speaking about a crush was ridiculous after such a short time…

"Let's go", Aidan said and stood up. "It's not far from here."

None of them disagreed, and some minutes later they were on the road again.

After one hour they left the path and were stepping into the wood. Surrounded by the voices of birds and the soft rustling of leaves they were walking. It was peaceful, and for the first time Cassy had the feeling she could really relax.

When Aidan raised his hands to his mouth to imitate the song of a bird, they paused. There was no interruption in the sound of the bird's voices, but one seemed to becoming loader. A second later a slender form was jumping from one of the trees nearby to the ground and landing catlike on her feet.

Fenris tensed, as did Cassy, but they both relaxed when they saw that neither Aidan, nor Derrik seemed to be wary.

"I already thought you would never come. But I guess it's the AGE that makes you so slow."

The voice belonged to a young girl, around eighteen years old, who had short, black hair and even darker, almond-shaped eyes. She was wearing a leather trouser, boots and a loosely falling linen shirt that was clamped to her body by a belt.

"Ayumi", Aidan welcomed her, ignoring her teasing words. "May I introduce Cassalia and Fenris to you?"

"Cassy!" she immediately corrected him and nodded into the direction of the young girl.

Ayumi gave her a genuine smile and then watched Fenris curiously. "Esther said that you are looking for Varania?"

Fenris nodded, suddenly tense, while Cassy was inwardly grinning about the name of Aidans Grand-Mother. Esther… She had expected something else. Maybe Zenobia. Or Lucretia. At least something sounding a bit more… haggishly.

Shaking her head about her silly thoughts, she followed Ayumi and was thereby grazing Fenris' hand with hers. He shot her a glance and smiled tightly.

"She is with the other women at the river", Ayumi just explained. "Doing the laundry."

"Ah… your favorite occupation…", Derrik said mockingly, and she shot him an angry glance.

"I have other talents."

"Indeed", he answered. "Mainly getting on our nerves…" Looking at Fenris and Cassy and ignoring Ayumis scowl, he explained: "This girl should have been better be born as a boy. She is a complete cub when it comes to all the women stuff, and from what I have gathered, she has in general not the interests other women have. At least according to the pubescent boys in the camp…"

"Oh, shut up!" the girl was erupting in anger. "Only because I don't see it as my life-goal to tidy up behind a man, doesn't mean that I am not interested in them… Ah, forget it. Why am I even talking to you!?"

And off she was, disappearing between the trees.

Derrik followed her with a chuckle and murmured that it seemed to be THAT time of the month for her. Fenris did not say anything at all, and Aidan… was looking troubled into the direction where the young woman had disappeared.

Guilty.

And Cassys curiosity was piqued.


	21. Siblings

Fenris heard the voices of women when they were approaching their target, as well as the laughter of children and the sound of water. Deep within he felt his agitation rise with every passing second and asked himself, not for the first time, what had been his REAL reason to go searching for his sister.

He had nearly killed her when he had learned of her betrayal. Only Hawke's and Varric's words had stopped him at this day in the Hanged Man. And afterwards he had not even one time thought about finding her. On the contrary: In his dreams and his anger he had sometimes regretted that he had NOT killed her, that he had NOT simply removed this last, hurtful, traitorous piece of his past.

But then, within the following weeks, he had felt that this could not be the end. The journey to Tevinter had been Hawkes idea, but the travel to Fereldan had been only HIS decision.

But now… What should he say to her? What did he WANT from her?

His steps were slowing down, and suddenly he was stopping, directly before the clearance they were about to accede. He felt Aidan look at him and Derrik as well, but ignored them. They eventually left him, and only Cassy stayed at his side, keeping her distance and saying nothing.

"She betrayed me", he heard himself tell her. "She had told my master where he could find me and lured me into a trap."

For a long moment it was silent, than Cassy hissed: "What?"

She sounded as angry as he had been on this day, and her reaction made two things clear to him: That he wasn't angry anymore, at least not as angry as he had been… and that this woman cared for him in a complete other way than anyone had cared for him before.

Without saying a word, he approached her, took her face into his palms, taking care that he did not hurt her with his gauntlets, and pressed a gentle kiss to her lips. "I will tell you everything", he said calmly when he let go of her again. "I know you are angry now, Cassy, but please: Don't scratch her eyes out…"

She was clearly furious, but also confused. "How could I NOT do it? She betrayed you!"

Such loyalty… He had no idea what he had done within the short time they were knowing each other to deserve it. Kissing her again, much deeper and more passionately then the last time, he was trying to show her how much her reaction meant to him. When his lips left hers, her face was not only flushed by anger anymore, but also arousal. "Please, do that for me, Cassalia. This is only about her and me…"

She nodded, hesitantly and clearly not exited. Slowly he was smiling at her, then turned and passed the trees to step into the sunlight.

He spotted his sister immediately. Her hair was shining deep red while she was just handing wet shirt to another woman and laughed about something she said. She was not wearing her Tevinter robes anymore, but simple Fereldan clothing.

She seemed to be… happy. Relaxed. The fear and terror, the guilt and anger were washed away from her face. Here she could have also been a normal Elven woman from an alienage, and not a former wannabe apprentice of a Tevinter magister who had been his master.

She was looking up, as if she had felt him watching her… and froze when she recognized him.

He saw her eyes widen while several emotions were wandering over her face: Shock, hope, sadness… fear. Then something strange was happening: Her gaze was twitching to the group of young children standing with their legs downstream into the river and sprinkling themselves with water. One of them, the boy Aidan had described to Cassy and him, was waving a hand at her and grinning wildly.

"Varania, look!"

Her gaze shot back to Fenris, and suddenly he found himself walking into the direction of this young one who had managed to somehow bring such a protectiveness into his sister's eyes.

Protectiveness she certainly had not felt for HIM the last time they had met.

An ice wall suddenly burst out of the ground in front of him and made him stop and grab his sword. Then Varania's voice hissed: "Don't you DARE to touch him… BROTHER!"

Fenris had tensed and gripped the knob of his sword while Cassy did the same with her daggers. What exactly was Varania thinking? That her brother would do something to the boy or hurt him? She couldn't be serious about that!

Her anger was rising with every second, while Varania and Fenris were simply looking each other into the eyes. SHE had betrayed HIM! How could she dare to threaten him now…?

"What is going on here?" The question had been asked by a woman with light, blond hair who was holding an infant on her hips and approaching them with a scowl. "Varania? Who is this man…?"

Varania was taking a step back and pushing Micah, who had reached her in the meantime, behind her back. "He is my brother."

The pale grey eyes of the woman widened. "Your brother? You haven't mentioned that you have a brother…" Her eyes became narrow. "What have you done to her that she is so afraid of you…?"

"What I have done?" Fenris words were so quiet that he could hardly be heard, sounding somehow lost.

That was the last straw for Cassy. She might have promised Fenris to not scratch out Varanias eyes, but that did not mean that she had to shut her mouth, right?

"I can't believe that!" she hissed and made a step towards Varania whose eyes widened when she recognized her. "Yeah, it's me. And it seems that I have been right about you from the beginning. You are nothing else but an opportunistic, traitorous bit…."

"STOP IT!"

She froze and turned her head. Aidan just made a step between the two women and the two elves.

"Fenris and Cassalia are our guests, sister", he explained, looking at the blond woman. Now that he was standing in front of her, the similarity between the two of them was obvious: The same eyes, the same hair color, the same tall figure.

"Varania!" Slowly the Elven woman was taking her eyes from Fenris, looking at the mage. "He is not here to cause harm to you or anybody else. He came here to find you and brought himself in extreme danger to get to you. I want ALL of you to calm down – NOW!"

It was silent for a short moment, than his sister started to speak. "Aidan, I don't know if this is a good I…"

"Elle", he interrupted her, suddenly sounding angry. "Do you really think I would have brought him here if I did not trust him?"

The infant on her hip started to whine while she was scowling at her brother, but not arguing anymore.

Turning again to Varania, Aidan added: "And if I see you using magic to harm or threaten another person again without reason, you and I will have a serious problem. We have clear rules here! Understood?"

Cassys jaw was dropping down. Who had thought that calm Aidan could have such a bidding tone…?

A low chuckle let her look to the side. Derrik had appeared next to her and said: "Ah, once back, Uncle Aidan is taken to it like a duck to water. He likes to be bossy sometimes…" Gazing at the young woman who was standing at his side, hardly reaching his shoulder, he added mischievously: "Isn't that so, Ayumi?"

The dark eyes of the girl narrowed, but she did not answer. Instead she was watching Fenris who was completely motionless, his face betraying nothing. Still Ayumi seemed to be afraid that he might lose it anytime, like did Cassy, because the woman's dark gaze looked worried.

"I can show the two of you the place where you can stay", Ayumi suggested.

Cassy was nodding quickly and shot the other woman a thankful smile. Turning to the Elven warrior, she asked: "Fenris?"

He did not say anything, but turned and left the clearance, neither looking at Varania, nor the others. His lips were pressed together and his markings slightly pulsating.

Well, he might not want to look at his sister at the moment, but Cassy had no problems with throwing a last, dark glance at Varania. Then she followed him quickly to the apostate's camp, wondering what she could do to make him feel better… and did not involve scratching Varanias eyes out…

After all she made a promise…

Inwardly grinning, she let her eyes ran over the mage's camp when she saw the first wagons appear between the trees. It was like she had anticipated from the view things Aidan had told: They were travelling people and merchants, bringing their good from one place to another and probably selling them on markets and the road. Their wagons had been parked in a semicircle on another clearance, and large sheets of canvas hung by ropes for shade between the wagons and trees. Apart from that there were several tents, bigger and smaller ones, and ropes on which the women pegged out washing. Horses and oxens were grazing aside in a small paddock, and goats as well as chicken were held in another one.

It was hard to tell how many people lived here, but Cassy would guess that it could be two dozen. Probably not all of them were mages, but in the end it did not matter: These people had decided to live with the constant danger to be spotted by templers who would immediately bring the mages into the next circle and punish those who had helped them to hide.

Cassy's gaze went back to Fenris. Still she had no political opinion regarding the mage's blight. All that was mattering to her had always been the question if the people she met were good or bad. That wasn't probably the most eloquent and far-reaching way of thinking, but, well… at least she was thinking at all about things like that…

"Ah, you finally arrived!"

Cassy flinched when she heard Esther's voice to her left and slowly turned to the old woman. When Aidan's Grand-Mother saw her face, she chuckled and added: "Afraid to see me naked again, girl?"

Taken aback Cassy stared at the witch and then could not help herself and laughed.

Her reaction let the other woman smirk and then look at Fenris. "Ah, I see… your first meeting with your sister did not turn out the way you have imagined, boy?"

Fenris' face did not betray anything. "I had no expectations at all, old lady. But… it could have been better…"

"Varania welcomed him with ice magic", Ayumi added with dry voice. "And Aidan already made clear to her that he does not approve her behavior…" When she mentioned the mage's name, her voice sounded a bit strange to Cassy, and she shot the young woman a side glance. It was becoming more obvious with every passing second that something had happened between those two, something both weren't satisfied with at all.

Esther seemed to think the same – slowly Cassy got the feeling and fear that the old witch could read minds – but did not comment Ayumis words, but simply said: "Show the two of them where they can sleep!"

When Ayumi nodded and approached a plane which had been strained between two wagons, Esthers voice let her pause. "Don't tell me you want to offer our guests a place to rest which isn't a bit more private…"?

With a frown Ayumi turned to the witch. "We have no free tent left."

"There is yours, girl! You can stay some more nights in the children tent…"

"What? I…" Ayumi did not be happy at all, and Cassy hurried to say: "That's not necessary! Fenris and I have no problem sleeping outside…"

"No!" Esther decided strictly and said to Ayumi: "Go and pick your stuff! You can get your own tent once these two have left us again!" Turning to Cassy and grazing Fenris – who was completely lost in brooding thoughts again – with her eyes, she added: "Believe me, girl. A bit of privacy will be the best for the two of you…"

Fighting her blush, Cassy forced herself to thank the old woman and ignored her chuckled: "You are welcome!"

One hour later she had cleaned herself in the river, washed her hair and came back to the tent Fenris and she shared. He had not said anything, simply but his baggage on the ground and then left, murmuring that he needed to be alone.

When she entered the tent, he was sitting on his sleeping berth, dressed in a dark, sleeveless shirt and dark trousers, and was still brooding silently.

Her eyes became narrow, and she simply watched him. When he still did not react, she approached him, crouched in front of him… and shoved him so hard against his chest that he was taken by surprise and falling on his back. Then she was bestriding him, placed her hands on both sides of his head and said calmly: "Stop brooding. Now!"


	22. Control

**NSFW – Have fun ;-)**

He was lying flat on his back while a determined looking Elven woman was straddling and telling him: "Stop brooding. Now!"

Another man probably would have found the whole situation enticing, but he wasn't ANOTHER man. He was simply himself, and right now he was furious and BROODING because he had every right to be!

First and foremost, he should not have allowed Hawke to persuade him to go to Tevinter and look for Varania. Then he should not have allowed HIMSELF to follow her trail to Fereldan. He should have listened to his inner voice, warning him that he would only find frustration when he followed this path, but still he had ignored it and hoped that it would be proven wrong.

But everything had turned out just the way it had always turned out when it came to his hopes: Disappointment.

There was nothing for him here.

He was alone.

Only when he heard Cassys next words, he realized that he had spoken the last words out aloud. "You are aware that there is just a woman straddling your lap, right? So talking about being alone isn't exactly what should come to your mind right now…" She sounded amused, furious and frustrated, at the same time and in equal measure.

A mixture of shame and anger washed over him. "I have not asked you to sit on my lap", he hissed and immediately flinched when he heard the offending words leave his mouth. Cassy was the last person in Thedas who had deserved his anger, especially after the loyalty she had shown him during the last hours.

Her eyes narrowed, but apart from that she did not move or withdraw. Instead, she leaned down, bringing their faces closer, and asked: "So you want me to go?"

She did not seem to be unsettled at all, or afraid about his answer, but he somehow knew that this wasn't the case. Declining her now would change the things between them in a way he certainly did not want them to change, despite his anger about her Cassys words. He had every right to BROOD!

"Oh, are we getting even grumpier… Prick?" Cassy said with a mocking, challenging tone to her voice.

A low growl erupted from his throat, than he tensed his muscles to throw her onto her back.

She did not allow it and was pressing herself more firmly against him to keep him down. Somehow it was… enticing that she was able to do so, even though he knew that he could have her on her back if he really had wished to see her there.

Her next words brought her his full attention again.

"No", she said while her damp strands were stroking over his shoulder; "this time we do it in MY way!"

He slowly raised an eyebrow, feeling his mood change into a completely other direction. "I did not have the feeling that MY way had been unwelcome the last time we touched…" His voice sounded slightly different as well, not so angry anymore, but teasing and a bit husky.

Her cheeks were blushing. "Don't let it go to your head, Prick. I am only willing to do you a favor…"

The thoughts about his sister were more and more leaving his mind, at least for the moment, while this difficult, challenging, brazen Elven woman was sitting on his lap and looking him into the eyes, a smile on her full lips and a mischievous, sensual sparkle in her eyes.

Then she slowly was straightening up and pulling on his shirt. "Off!"

Cassy could see Fenris mood shift while his hands closed around her waist. She had to hide a small smile: He simply could not allow her to take over control, at least not completely.

Rising an eyebrow she looked down at his dark shirt. "You are still wearing it…"

Slowly he was pushing himself up, bringing their upper bodies so close that her breasts touched his chest. "Willing to help me?"

She smirked, then rolled dramatically her eyes, pushed him down again and let her hands slide under his shirt and over his skin. Under her fingers she felt his muscles flex and slowly pushed the material upwards.

Inch by inch of tanned, lyrium touched skin appeared. Leaning down she pressed her lips to the skin where his neck met his shoulders.

A small sound escaped his lips, and she smiled against his skin while pushing the shirt over his head, feeling himself lift his shoulder blades and back from the blanket to help her.

Never in her life had she felt so sexually brazen. She wasn't shy when it came to sex, but it had always been a quick business, focusing on bringing relief to both sides. She had not wanted anything else, and when she had realized that she might have a partner with other expectations, she had ended the relationship.

Being with Fenris, trying to seduce and comfort him at the same time… it was something she had never done before.

Fear and doubts were suddenly rising, but she pushed the feelings aside, not wanting to ruin the moment, but simply FEEL. Without looking him into the eyes, she started to caress his skin, enjoying its taste and warmth and smoothness, while her fingers were roaming over his body. His lyrium markings were slightly compiled, and she traced them with her fingers and felt them come alive under her touch.

His fingers were suddenly in her hair, stroking it to the side. "You have to promise me to stop before they hurt you", he said hoarsely.

Slowly she was looking into his eyes, a smart-ass comment on her lips which died when she saw his gaze: Passionate, but also concerned, and somehow vulnerable.

_

Fenris wasn't sure what Cassy was thinking when she looked up to him, but suddenly her gaze was turning soft, and then she answered: "Don't worry, Prick. As I said: I am a big girl. And now shut up and relax."

And with these words she pressed her lips to the lyrium markings at his throat and caressed them with her tongue, while her fingers were stroking over his stomach.

The sensation of the touch made him shiver, and he fought a moan. He might remember some intimate scenes of his past, but this was definitely new: Having his markings caressed. While he had been Danarius bodyguard, he had allowed nobody close, and certainly not in his time as a fugitive.

Her mouth started to follow his lyrium markings, her lips soft and careful, her tongue gentle and warm, but becoming more boldly when she found out that he liked to be caressed more firmly. She had probably no idea what she was doing to him, but she was clearly enjoying it, watching him out of half lidded eyes, looking more sensual than ever, feminine and soft in the dimmed light within the tent.

Passion rocked through his body when her mouth suddenly and unexpectedly closed around his nipple, at the same time as her hand was traveling below the waistband of his trouser and closing around his hardened flesh. Involuntarily he moved, pressing himself into her grip, a strangled moan escaping his lips.

This was… too soon. Too much. His markings were pulsating and burning, not painful, but so intensive that his blood seemed to be drumming from within…

"Shhh…" Suddenly her lips caressed his face, and the touch of her fingers around his erection became gentler. "Just relax. Just enjoy. " Her thumb stroked over its tip, and then she started to caress him again, in a light, smooth speed.

He was opening his eyes and saw her looking at him, words of apology on his lips, feeling embarrassed and stupid… The feeling disappeared when he saw the flushed and passionate look on her face and felt her caress become firmer again.

"Stop brooding, Fenris", she whispered. "Or I swear, I will do the same tonight, so that everyone will be able to see you outside of the tent… especially Derrik…"

A surprised laugh escaped his lips, feeling unexpected and strange and GOOD in this intimate situation, and she smiled genuinely and winked at him.

He couldn't completely let go. Maybe he would never be able to do so. But he allowed himself and her this pleasure, felt her move restlessly against him while she was stroking him, heard her breathing quicken with his' and understood that this was as thrilling for her as for him….

Well, maybe not completely, was the last clear thought he had before the orgasm washed over him, heavy and strong, while he was trying to stay as calm as possible. She helped him by pressing her lips to his and then continued kissing him. He returned the kiss, gently and lazily stroking through her hair while he tried to find his breath again.

She softly laughed at his lips. "I think we both should go to the river again, don't you think?"

A smirk appeared in the corner of his mouth, but instead of answering her, he simply pulled her down on him, holding her close and enjoying the moment because he knew that the next drama would come soon enough.


	23. Brother

Cassy was smiling when Fenris and she left the tent one hour later. They had simply lain together and not spoken, which was probably for the best. The chances that one of them would say something stupid were quite high, so staying silent after what they had done had been a good idea.

She could still felt the heat of his body and his smell, could still feel how his hand had stroked her hair throughout the whole time while his heartbeat had slowed down under her ear.

The things she had felt while lying in his arms… They were dangerous and it was probably better not to talk and think about THEM as well.

They weren't holding hands when walking into the river's direction – the thought alone was kind of ridiculous – but they were walking close enough to touch sometimes. She did not look at him, but had the feeling that he was smiling. One time she dared to glance at him out of the corner of her eyes, in exactly the same moment in which he did the same.

They both blushed and looked away, behaving like some stupid, love-sick kids.

Which they weren't. Of course not. Neither kids, and definitely not love-sick.

Just confused. Or maybe both so sex-starved that only a simple look provoked the strangest reactions in them.

She knew why this was the case with her – she had been a long time without man – but had no idea why he seemed to also have been for quite some time without a woman. She clearly remembered how he had nearly lost control when she had touched him for the first time intimately. Not in the way that he had been about to orgasm, but still he had seemed to be for a moment completely lost in the sensation of her touch. In these seconds she had simply reacted and tried to calm him down. And been very flattered that she had been able to provoke such a reaction in the stoic Elven warrior.

The voices of a man and a woman let them stop before arriving at the river. Cassy knew that the man was Aidan, his deep voice already familiar.

"I had my reasons to act like I did!" Well, this was Varania. Her voice was familiar as well and let Cassy make a face.

Fenris froze next to her.

"And I told you right from the beginning that we have rules here!" Aidan answered, his voice not as calm as Cassy was used to, but still much calmer than Varanias. "Anyway: I have never experienced you so… uncontrolled. Will you tell me what happened between the two of you?"

It was silent for a long moment and only the sound of the river water could be heard. Cassy used the time to sneak closer and ignored Fenris attempts to hold her back. Eventually he followed her, giving her a grumpy look she returned with a raised eyebrow.

It was time to find out what was going on here. And it wasn't really eavesdropping when Aidan and Varania were talking in the wilderness and not in a more private place, right?

Varania was standing in front of Aidan with crossed arms, a mixture of annoyance and something else on her face. If Cassy had not known better, she would have described it as vulnerability.

Well, actually she KNEW that it was vulnerability. She had seen the same look on Fenris' face only one hour ago, and the similarity between the two of them was in this moment undeniable.

"Varania!" Aidans voice had softened, and he made a small step towards the Elven woman. His figure seemed to be big and strong next to her fragile shape, but somehow he managed to look protective and not threatening at all.

Slowly Varania relaxed, than blinked and moved, turning her back to him. "I… I betrayed him. My own brother. But I had no other chance." She inhaled deeply while Aidan was waiting patiently for her next words. "Leto would have understood why I acted like I did. But this man – this stranger – can't…"

Cassy shot Fenris a short glance. Leto…? He was looking at Varania, his stance tensed, his attention completely at what his sister was saying. Obviously he hadn't any problems with eavesdropping anymore.

"What happened?" Aidan asked gently, not condemning or judging her, but simply wanting to understand.

"Fenris had left mother and me to become Danarius bodyguard. I guess he did not know what that meant, and neither did we. The last time I have seen him was on the day he said good bye to us, promising that everything would be better soon. And then, some weeks later, our master told us that we were free to go wherever we wanted." She sighed. "But freedom wasn't what we always had expected it to be. Although we had received money, we soon found out that it did not mean anything in a place where most elves were nothing but slaves. And we were too afraid to leave. When mother became ill, we found a place to stay, and I was looking after her. In this time I also started to feel something change inside of me." She looked at Aidan again. "Today I know that it was my magic, starting to awake."

"This most have been difficult", he said.

Varania laughed harshly. "Difficult? You have no idea! I did not know any other elf with magic, and I certainly did not want to become a magistra. After mother had died, I went to Quarinus and found a servant position at the court of Magister Ahriman." She inhaled deeply. "He was a well educated man and did not seem to be cruel to his slaves. I thought he was a bit like the master Leto and I had grown up with. Sometimes I watched him cast spells and tried to adapt what he did when I was on my own. And I started to hope…." She shook her head. "I was so stupid, but I started to think that maybe he could teach me."

She was silent again, for a long moment, and eventually said, her voice hard: "But then the day came when I learned that in Tevinter, and Elf counts NOTHING, even an elf with magic. Ahriman had guests and presented them his new apprentice, a beautiful young Elven boy. He said that he had found him by coincidence and thought he was quite special. And then... he sacrificed him in a blood ritual, tell him - while he was dying - that he could not have really thought that HE, a Tevinter Magister, would allow HIM to become powerful…" Her voice was now full of hatred. "Afterwards I simply tried to choke the power growing inside of me, but it was becoming stronger with every day. I hated it, because I knew it was there, and once someone would find out about it, I would be probably killed as well. But still I wasn't able to STOP it. So I lived in the constant fear of being detected for what I am: An Elven servant with magic, but without any real power… and without any rights."

"But in the end, you became an apprentice…", Aidan eventually said when she was silent for some long minutes.

"Yes", she whispered. "At least I was on my way of becoming one. I had not known that Leto had escaped Danarius. I had not even known that he WANTED to escape. Some days after I had received my brother's letter, asking for me, Danarius had been a guest in Ahrimans household. In the evening, when I brought him something to drink, he told me that he knew who I was. In the end I think that he had always kept track on me and just waited for Leto to get in contact with me. And then one thing lead to another. He asked me if I knew where Leto was. I said no. He did not believe me and showed me the power of blood magic right away: He forced me to tell the truth, and I gave him the letter. And then he said that it would be perfect to have both of us with him again: Me as his apprentice and Fenris as his bodyguard…"

"But then you did not really betray him", Aidan commented.

She shrugged, her face calm, betraying nothing. "Is that so, Aidan? Shouldn't I have fight him more? And if he had NOT used blood magic on me, but still offered me to become his apprentice: Would I really have said no? He is a half-elf himself, did you know that? I am sure that he would not have done anything to me… I don't know", she ended bitterly. "I simply know that I did not try to warn Leto when he came into this tavern. In the moment he entered the room, he did not really feel like my brother anymore…"

Cassy's gaze went to Fenris, concerned about his reaction, but he stayed calm. Then he slowly started to move backwards, leaving the scene, and she understood him. What he had just learned might show Varania in a completely new light to him. Certainly not a good one – she personally was still not thinking the best of the other woman – but at least he had some answers now.

Fenris' eyes met hers, and he signaled her to come with him.

"Ah, look whose there…"

They both tensed when they heard Derriks voice, but then realized that the mage had spoken to Aidan and Varania, appearing between the trees.

"Did you give her a talking-off, Uncle Aidan?"

Aidan grimaced, but otherwise ignored the battle mage and said instead to the Elven woman: "Thanks for telling me all this, Varania. Maybe meeting each other again is a chance for a new beginning between your brother and you. He was looking for you, and it is clearly not his intention to harm you."

She did not seem convinced, showing a look on her face which was as stubborn as Fenris' when he did not like what he heard. Cassy shot the Elven warrior a glance and had to hide a smile when she saw that he had been coming back again.

"Yes, Ice Princess", Derrik agreed mockingly. "Your brother is a real sweetheart…"

Varanias eyes narrowed at the mage, as did Aidans, Cassys and Fenris', even though he could not see theirs.

Chuckling Aidan raised his hands. "Don't look like that, Ice Princess. I only want to show my willingness to defend you in case it might become necessary…"

"I am perfectly capable of defending myself", she answered pressed.

He was slowly raising his eyebrows. "Well, we will see that once we start our training sessions again."

"I wasn't the one who decided to interrupt them and left to chase off his lunatic mage friend", she answered and crossed her arms in front of her chest. "Esther told us what happened in the Deep Roads."

"Oh… jeez!" Now Derriks hands touched the place over is heart. "Do I detect a note of concern in your voice, Ice Princess?"

"Don't be ridiculous", was all he got as answer, followed by: "And stop calling me like this. Why do you call me Ice Princess anyway? If you have not recognized: My hair is bright red, like fire!"

"But you behavior is not", he answered. "And neither is your soul… at least not yet." Now he smiled charmingly. "But if you like I can help you with this. Unfortunately my latest option of a new girlfriend ran off with your brother, so I can give you my complete attention…."

"Derrik", Aidan rumbled warningly while Varania simply stared at the battle mage, her mouth slightly opened in bewilderment: Either because Derrik was really so brazen to tell her that she was his second choice, or maybe also because it had been Cassy he had be interested in.

Anyway: Cassy felt slightly amused.

Fenris obviously was it not.

Not at all.

And therefore he started to glow.

Fenris had enough of hearing the damn mage insult and make others look like fools. This time the activation of his lyrium did not happen involuntarily, but on purpose, and he started to move.

Cassys hand closed around his wrist while she was saying: "Wait and see!"

Scowling at her, he looked at the three mages again… and saw Derrik stumble back, hit by a mind blast which had not been casted by Varania, but Aidan.

For the first time since he had met him, Fenris saw Derrik being speechless, blinking at Aidan stunned.

"I don't know what is wrong with you, Derrik", the other mage said; "but STOP INSULTING my people!"

Derrik still stared at his friend, than his eyes narrowed. "What about your own rule of not casting spells against other people you haven't understood, Uncle Aidan…?"

"Want to have a little pounding, Derrik?" was all Aidan answered, sounding – oddly enough – less furious, but nearly friendly.

Derrik slowly started to grin. "Think you can take me on…?

Now Varania reacted. "You can't be serious…"

She did not even finish the sentence, when the two men already charged… and started to fight. Not with magic, but sparring against each other in a good, old fist fight.

Cleary taken aback, Fenris gave Cassy a glance, while all she could do was starting to grin. This whole scene remembered her so much of Soris and herself, much younger in the alienage, whenever they had needed to blow off some steam.

Of course she had always won. Soris had never been so much of a fighter, at least not with his fists…

The sound of the two men fighting and insulting each other – well, actually it was only Derrik who insulted Aidan, while the other mage stayed calm and concentrated – let other camp habitants approach, and soon a crowd was surrounding both, cheering and laughing. Varania had made some steps back and looked as if she could not understand at all why the two were doing what they were doing.

Ayumi appeared next to Cassy and grinned at her. "They always end up doing this eventually. It's the only way to let Derrik shut up!"

Nodding at the two of them, the young woman also stepped into the crowd, and Cassy took Fenris hand and pulled him with her. He followed her hesitantly and shot Varania a sight glance. His sister froze when she saw the two of them appear between the trees, but did not leave.

Derrik crashed to her feet, looking slightly dizzy and blinking a few times. Then he said "You are right: Your hair really HAS the color of fire!", got up again and kicked Aidan from his feet.

Panting, the two men fell to the side and lay on their backs, looking up into the crowns of the trees and grinning widely.

"If you think that I will heal one of you", Esther's dry voice could be heard; "then you are mistaken. Stupid boys…"

Derrik turned on his stomach and looked up at her out of doe eyes.

"No chance, boy", she chuckled. "And due to the fact that you managed to mess up with all available healers in the camp, I guess you have to live with this scratch on your cheek…"

He scowled and touched the little wound he had received while scratching over the forest floor. His eyes went wide. "Jeez! My pretty face…."

The crowd laughed and then was dissolving. Aidan got up and offered Derrik his hand which the battle mage took and got up as well.

"Now, that was a fight", he stated pleased.

Aidan chuckled. "Will it calm you down for at least one night…?"

"Aidan…" Ayumi sighed, and he scowled down at her.

"What?"

"You know that this is a perfect base for him to answer something filthy again, do you?"

While Aidan was looking irritated at the young woman in front of him, Derrik immediately took his chance. "Indeed. So, ladies: Who wants to make sure that I REALLY get tired tonight…"

Cassy, Varania and Ayumi rolled their eyes like one person, turned… and froze.

A boy crashed through the trees, his face covered with dirt and tears and his arms scratched, sobbing one word that let Varania – actually all of them – freeze immediately.

"Micah…"


End file.
